SONG TITLE: "Welcome to Sunnydale"
EPISODE: 1.01 "Welcome to the Hellmouth"
AUTHOR: Doctor Strangelove (strangelove317@hotmail.com)
A/N: Okay, I've got way too many Buffy songs flying around my head. This is the
third musical fic. What if all the episodes had been musicals? This is the first
part of that answer. For purposes of this fic, assume that singing and dancing
is normal behavior.
[We open on the Welcome to Sunnydale sign. A group of about four people come out, dressed similarly and an upbeat tune starts playing.]
TOWNSFOLK
Sure, there's San Francisco.
Sacramento and L.A.
But if you're looking for something more,
Well, it's your lucky day!
Welcome to Sunnydale!
Sunnydale, U.S.A.!
You'll love Sunnydale!
You know you'll wanna stay!
[Suddenly the scenery changes and we're at Sunnydale High. The four townsfolk are walking along the halls singing and occasionally the student body joins in.]
Why there's so much to do!
[Four thug looking students pop out from behind a locker, beating up Jonathon.]
KYLE, TOR, HEIDI, RHONDA
We love the zoo!
TOWNSFOLK
Our normalcy will hit ya!
Our cheerleaders will bewitch ya!
CHEERLEADERS
Come see the mighty Razorbacks!
We swear no one's under attack!
Ignore our dwindling population.
NATALIE FRENCH
And the man and insect copulation!
PRINCIPAL FLUTIE
But if you're really smart,
Stay indoors after dark!
The people here are amazin',
Even if they're strictly Caucasian!
TOWNSFOLK
We deny all reports of puppets,
Or killer Internet robots!
Better buy a home before they're gone!
We've never heard of the Annointed One!
We've got our fair share or bars and pubs,
The Bronze is quite an awesome club!
Tell ya, the homes are going faster!
Hmm? What's that? The Master?
Yes, we've heard the strange reports,
And to them, well, we retort,
There's no place like us around!
Sunnydale! Sunnydale!
[We pan up and the entire population starts singing.]
EVERYONE
It's a hell of a town!