One of the many MANY joys of sleep deprivation

by Hn.Fool

This is a "thought it was witty at the time and was moved to post it" drabble. I hope you enjoy it. It amused me for a good couple of hours. Definitely not meant to be taken seriously, though I'd like to flatter myself into believing that I've captured the essence of RDJ's comic genius in this, it might just be the sleep deprivation. I own nothing. It's called "FAN-fiction"...-.-

Note: Author obviously doesn't own Sherlock Holmes or any of its characters. Furthermore, author doesn't own NyQuil or Dr. Pepper. I own copies of the books, movies, posters, a pack of NyQuil and a bottle of Dr. Pepper. Actually, the latter was my sister's. We have a barter system... .

This story is rated for suggested drug use. I'm not sure if the mixture of NyQuil and Dr. Pepper constitutes a drug, but I am both drowsy and energized at the moment. Safe to assume, bad idea. Enjoy the side-effects.

WATSON! Why aren't you awake to hear my genius rewrites?! WATSON!

I've created something that greatly surpasses the formaldehyde and my 7% solution, old boy. It is a combination of "NyQuil": the most innovative invention of the past hapless century of dwindling human intelligence, and a drink they call "Dr. Pepper."

I wish for you to do battle with this doctor, Doctor. He claims to have combined 23 flavors into the same drink, highly improbable, it tastes suspiciously like the water from the Thames...even has the same texture and density. Quite preplexingly, it also sustains a similar hue...hmm.

I propose we examine it with arduous scrutiny!

I have reason to believe Nanny is behind this poison...that "Dr. Pepper" is merely an alias of hers. It would explain her strange comings and goings. AHA! I have foiled your plans, *growls* Nanny. Mycroft may have also had a hand in this. One of the tastes I detect is that of his favorite potted shrimp from the Diogenes Club, though I do not consider him a likely suspect in the identity of this "Pepper" person. He's far too lazy to come up with an alias. Then again, NyQuil causes drowsiness...hmm. Coincidence, you say? HA! I do not believe in such illogical unlinked chains of events! It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data, after all. One may begin to twist facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts. Therefore, I have tested this concoction on myself...and Gladstone...*dog whines and falls over*...he doesn't mind.

The End?