A/N: Just a little plot-monkey that danced around my head. Not even sure if this is written that well, but figured I haven't seen anything like it show up before, when this sort of ending seems to make SO MUCH SENSE...at least to me. Please review!
Lolita
"All reports point to these coordinates. Whatever Cerberus is doing, it is not good. The priority is to shut it down. If you can gather intel, do that, but that is secondary to the main mission."
"Got it." Jack nodded. When the signal cut, she turned to her squad. "Alright kids, let's show these bitches how to die."
The shuttle swerved as everyone flared their biotics. Jack turned her head, enjoying the cracking of her neck as she popped the vertebrae. Ten years since the Reapers, five years since the galaxy got its act together and adapted to the absence of the mass relays, and still nothing gets her going quite like taking down Cerberus projects. Shepard would no doubt have been annoyed that her efforts wound up leading to this; Cerberus had not stayed down for long, and once the Reaper threat was over, it was not long before some hotshot picked up the Illusive Man's mantle as if that were something to be proud of. Of course, the new Cerberus was not the only thing that reared its head; petty politics resumed after the galaxy realized they no longer had to be united against a common threat. Once the Reapers were gone, everyone seemed to take this as a cue to go down Stupid Lane.
All the more fun for someone like Jack.
"Alright peeps, we're landing," The pilot called out, and the shuttle hovered momentarily above ground to land. As soon as the hatch opened, Jack leaped out, leading her biotic squad toward the stunned Cerberus guards. Blue light blazed and she sent one man flying into the air before any of them had the time to aim their pathetic excuse for weapons.
"Let'em have it, boys and girls!" Jack laughed, and dove in to the field of bloodshed and battlelust.
Her team was good, and though they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Jack was pretty sure she was not just being biased. These kids were good kids, and though not all of them could do what Jack does, they had the heart and they had the spirit. They were her students, and as she told Shepard long ago, if anyone hurt them, there were many things Jack had picked up in her life that would allow her to address them in the most suitable manner. What was even better was that she knew these kids would do no less for her sake. They were all human biotics, they were all sticking by each other, and together they were invincible.
Shepard had given her that. People she could trust, could count on. The Commander had been the first person Jack ever encountered in her life who stuck by her and gave her as much as Jack had given back. More. It figured that someone like Shepard would be taken away from the galaxy; the good ones never last, but then going out the way she did sort of proved just how great Shepard was, specifically because the good ones never last.
Cerberus did not stand a chance. Jack would not be surprised if half of them did not even know how to use a gun before picking one up. Blood smeared the walls as the biotics crushed the guards, knocking them through consoles that spit out flashes of electric sparks. Jack's head hummed with the thrill of battle, and battle rushed through her veins. Even when there were no more enemies, she was still high with its energies.
"Not a bad day's work," She brushed off her hands.
"Hell yeah," Two of her squadmates high-fived each other.
A blast of blue biotics suddenly knocked down three of her students in the hall.
"Shit!"
Jack ignored the young man, gathering energies in her right fist as she dashed to the hall. You wanna know how to fuck, bitch? She thought venomously, ready to show that agent just what being a biotic meant, but then—
The blaze of blue dimmed slightly, enough to reveal that the user was small, no more than a child. Thin like a stick, the girl was a waif of a thing, hair cropped in a military haircut. Small jaw, small mouth, small nose, and small face, but the eyes and eyebrows were terribly familiar.
"Shit!" Jack exclaimed, and let down her guard, but the child did not attack, and after a moment, both released their hold on their powers, as if reaching a silent agreement of sorts.
"Uh, Teach?" One of her squadmates remarked, baffled by how Jack was not killing everything around her.
"Shut up Neil," Jack barked back, mind spinning at the sight. It can't be...but Cerberus had done more unbelievable things before. "Shit. Everyone hold it! Shit, shit, shit!"
You have to see this, Jack had written, I'm not shitting you, you have to see this. In person. It's not safe to tell you on the extranet. Just fucking get your asses over here.
She had mass emailed everyone. Notably, anyone who had fought with Shepard over the three years leading up to the Reapers.
"What do you think?" Liara asked, for what must have been the fiftieth time since they embarked on the journey.
"I don't know," Ashley said quietly.
Ten years since the Reapers, five years since the galaxy fully reunited after the disappearance of the Mass Relays. Commander Shepard of the Normandy had been a hero for all of maybe a year or two before she passed into irrelevance, as all things do with time. Known as a legend, with statues made in her name, but people no longer quite grasped just how mighty she had been, and some things she left behind did not remain. Alliances forged under her name wobbled or broke down entirely. There were some main differences she had made; the krogan and the turians got along marginally better than they had before the Reapers, with the krogan breeding like insects and Wrex leading their fold. Geth had helped the quarians adjust to lives outside their suits within three years of the Reapers' downfall, allowing Tali to wear a dress and makeup for the first time in her life. Humans were held in high regard now; one of their own had helped the galaxy accomplish what no other cycle had ever done. The galaxy had changed, and Shepard helped shape it all, and that was, perhaps, what anyone could hope for. Yetthere were changes that did not stay. Aria T'Loak and her mercenaries went back to terrorizing what was left of Omega. Politics abounded again, with the salarians resentful of the krogan and turians. Most of all, everyone from Shepard's personal team moved on and went their separate ways. Liara had worked to use her Shadow Broker forces to reunite the galaxy instead of weed out secrets for money, though she had been unable to attain information about the new Cerberus and whatever they might be up to, beyond the fact that they were up to something involving biotics; hence informing the Alliance and sending Jack and her team that way in the first place. Tali helped build a home on Rannoch while Garrus trained to be a Spectre; Ashley sometimes saw him in her work, but usually they rarely crossed ways. Wrex led Tuchanka and reined in the clans with Bakara. Jack delved into training biotics for the Alliance, and Miranda worked to help build technology that eventually substituted the mass relays and reunited the galaxy. Jacob, Grunt, Joker, EDI, James, Chakwas, Kelly, others...everyone simply gave each other some contact info so they would know who died, but other than that, no one really kept in touch. Too much to rebuild, too much to do, and the thread that tied them together had perished with the Reapers.
"I just don't get it," Liara shook her head, smoothing her at her fringe. "Why would she contact everyone like this? It has to do with Shepard. I know it. I just can't fathom what."
"We'll know when we get there," Ashley told her, voice reassuring, but in truth, her heart was thudding in her throat.
Everyone knew that there was a new Cerberus. Everyone also knew that Cerberus was responsible for Shepard's return after two years of being declared dead. The galaxy at large did not necessarily know the details of her resurrection, but everyone Jack had contacted knew, knew that once upon a time, Cerberus had been able to do what everyone declared impossible.
You have to see this, She had said, In person.
"What if..." Liara began.
"We'll know when we get there," Ashley repeated, even as she wondered the same thing.
Miranda knelt. "What's your name?" She asked.
The girl merely stared back with Shepard's eyes and said nothing.
"Yeah, I tried that," Jack sneered, "She hasn't spoken since we first met. You're welcome to keep trying, though. You know what they say about fuckers who try the same thing and expect different results."
"Language," Miranda blurted before she could think better of it. Jack's eyes widened, but the woman had the sense to look a little chagrined.
"Well f—oh forget it." The biotic sighed, turning around and grabbing at the ponytail streaming from the top of her head.
Little-Shepard, as Miranda was starting to label the girl, viewed the whole exchange with a blankness that was frankly frightening, especially if this child was supposed to be Shepard's clone. The Commander had never been so...indifferent. Tough, stubborn, sometimes unyielding, but she had always been a woman of spirit, and it was her spirit that drew others to her.
"Are you going to run some tests?" Jack asked, "Make sure she's for real? I haven't notified anyone about this. Bastards in the Alliance...there are good people, but I'm not a fucking retard."
"I can run some in my lab," Miranda looked back at Little Shepard. She was the first person out of those Jack had contacted to arrive, much to the other biotic's chagrin. They were hardly best friends, though both of their temperaments had smoothed down over the years, enough to have civil conversations. "Who else is coming?"
"Everyone."
"Everyone?"
"Everyone."
"Even Tali and Garrus?"
"I did fucking say 'everyone', didn't I?" When Miranda gave her a reproachful look, Jack swore again. "Well fuck me. Not like that kid hasn't heard the fucking terms elsewhere."
The child reached back and rubbed her neck, looking weary and almost listless. Jack had procured a set of t-shirt and jeans along with socks and sneakers. Miranda had seen Shepard's remains after the first Normandy was attacked, but she had never seen Shepard look so small. There was a frailty about her that was absent in her adult form. Even before her brain showed signs of neural activity during the Lazarus Project, the Commander had been a figure to behold.
"Hey," Miranda said softly, looking the child in the eyes, "It's going to be alright."
The girl said nothing.
"Do you think she remembers anything?" Miranda asked, even when in her head she instantly refuted the idea. Memories did not work like that. Otherwise, Miranda would have simply been a female version of her father.
"Don't know," Jack remarked, "But something made her stop attacking me. Maybe she does know me, at least a little." The woman glanced down. "Fuck." She shook her head. "It's been how many days and I still can't get over it."
"I'll draw some blood samples...we'll know for sure once I run the tests." Miranda looked at the girl. "Hey," She tried again, "Please...talk to us. Tell us...we're here to help. Please."
In her hour of need, Shepard had never failed her. The Commander had always been there for her crew, every member, for any thing, whether it was ingredients for Gardner, or Serrice Ice Brandy for Chakwas, going out of her way to help Jacob, helping Liara, everything and anything that anyone had approached her with, Shepard had done her best to help, to aid. For Miranda, asking for Shepard's help with Oriana had been an act of desperation that put her pride and trust in humanity on the line. The Commander had responded with the kindness everyone close to her came to expect. Shepard never denied anyone anything. If she could help, she would.
So when Little-Shepard met Miranda's gaze for a moment only to look aside, silent as ever, Miranda could not tell if this was because at heart, the child was not really Shepard after all, or if perhaps, for some reason, she could not respond the way she use to.
Both thoughts sent a chill through her spine.
"She is one hundred percent Shepard, genetically." Miranda told them. "Dr. Chakwas ran some physicals, she comprehends commands and there's nothing physically wrong with her. She doesn't have anything wrong with her vocal cords, but she just doesn't talk. I don't know."
Liara stared through the one-way window. It had felt like cold water got dunked over her when Jack and Miranda first told everyone that Cerberus had cloned Shepard. She could not imagine how Garrus was feeling, or Tali. Ten years...
"Keelah..." Tali whispered. "She has Shepard's eyes."
"I guess she had to start off somewhere," Wrex murmured, eyeing the child with wary skepticism. "Scrawny little thing though. Not like the Commander at all."
"Those bastards," James shook his head, "Couldn't leave the dead in peace, have to go ahead and do this—there comes a point where this stops being a good thing and just becomes downright disrespectful. However we all wished Lola to have survived, she deserved a chance to rest in peace. Damn them."
"There's nothing to suggest that she's Shepard up here," Miranda gestured to her own temple, "Just because she is genetically identical doesn't mean she is Shepard. Shepard is a product of a lifetime of unique experience, working with what people she worked with and growing in what environment she grew in. Those cannot be replicated."
"So who is that in there?"
"More like her daughter," Liara said quietly, walking up to the window. The child was sitting on her bed, staring at the distant wall. "Just as Miranda was her father's daughter. This child is Shepard's."
Garrus walked up next to Liara, his eyes inscrutable.
"I want to see her," He said at last.
"She might not remember you," Dr. Chakwas warned.
The turian's talons were balled into fists. "If she's Shepard's daughter, she's not required to remember me. I want to talk to her."
Liara glanced at Tali. The quarian was quite beautiful; all of their species ended up being resplendent once out of their suits, perhaps even more so than the asari. She was solemn now, pale eyes glistening as she watched her husband and mate stare at this remnant of his past love.
Shepard's death had hurt them both. Tali had always regarded her as a sister, and when news came of her demise, the quarian had been unable to help with reconstruction due to her grief. "She was the first friend I had on my Pilgrimage," She had sobbed to Liara, "She is the reason I became who I am. She is the reason I am anyone at all. And she's dead, so I can build a life on Rannoch. It's not fair. It shouldn't have been her. It's not fair."
Garrus had mourned Shepard for five long years, and Liara knew that part of him still mourned. One thing everyone shared was that they all grew to who they were because of Shepard. They were loyal to her not only because she was a great individual, but because she in turn made each of them great as well. Yet none of them had been quite as close to her as Garrus was in the end. When she died, Garrus fell violently ill and almost did not survive long after her. It was through Tali that he eventually found reason to live again, because Tali was a sweetheart and was as close to understanding what Garrus was going through as anyone could be. Together, they managed to overcome their grief and move on, always honoring their beloved commander, but recognizing there was more to life than her ghost. Garrus allowed himself to fall in love with another, someone quite different from Shepard, but still carrying some of her essence, and Tali found a husband and friend in place of the sister she had lost.
Seeing Shepard's clone must be striking them so hard.
"We can all see her," Liara suggested, "Just...let Garrus go in first. If she talks at all, maybe she will talk to Garrus. Who knows, maybe some part of her remembers him."
"Which part?" Joker huffed. "That kid's like ten years old. We all know what Shep and her turian did in their downtime. Would be kind of awkward if that's what she remembers."
No one laughed.
"Do you still want to go in?" Miranda asked.
Garrus's mandibles fluttered, but he straightened, resolute.
"Yeah," He said.
The girl inside the room seemed nervous when the turian walked in. Garrus, for his part, seemed calm and collected, though by this point Tali recognized the various signs that showed just how tense he was. The set of his shoulders, his mandibles, the way he slowly extended his talons a little so they would not make the fists they had made outside.
When Shepard was alive, Garrus had been unequivocally hers. It was hard to imagine that Tali might actually know Garrus now better than Shepard ever did. It was not fair, of course. Tali had ten years to really get to know him. Shepard really only had one, before she was taken from them all.
Like a candle in the wind, Traynor had said. Burnt out, long before her legend ever will.
"Archangel," The child spoke, startling Tali out of her reverie.
"Well, I guess she talks," Joker murmured.
Tali found herself unsurprised. If anyone could get Shepard to talk, it would be Garrus.
"You know me," Her husband murmured.
"I know everyone." The child's voice was so young, but it held a familiar tone, one that resurrected the image of the Shepard Tali knew long ago. A leader. A sister. "I have seen accounts. Videos. Reports."
"Do you remember anything yourself?"
A pregnant pause.
"Some."
Silence fell for a time.
"Shit," Joker murmured, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. Tali mentally cursed in her own language. She could tell how much this was hurting Garrus because this was hurting her too.
We had finally moved on. It was so hard to move on, and you just...but it was wrong for her to blame the child. Shepard never asked to be cloned.
Shepard never asked for anything. She always gave, gave, gave, and all she ever got in return was doubt, mistrust, and some accolades that would never matter to a dead person, because the dead had no use for them. A statue, here and there. Her name written in school texts. What use was that? Shepard never got to live to see the galaxy saved, and all these things were more to comfort her allies and friends. Shepard could not care less for these sort of things back when she was alive; being dead would hardly make them more meaningful.
Garrus maintained that outside composure.
"What do you remember?"
The child paused again. "Not really sure. You just feel familiar. Mostly impressions."
Her voice is so young. Once upon a time Tali would have given anything to see what Shepard looked like as a child. She never had the opportunity to ask. Shepard always...asked about other people instead. Allowed them to confide in her.
Garrus must have been the only one she had confided to back.
"What is your name?" Garrus asked.
The child hugged her knees. "Shepard."
"What is your first name?"
She shrugged. "They always just called me 'Shepard'."
"Your caretakers?"
The girl nodded.
Garrus appeared to take in her form. "They treat you alright?"
The girl did not respond.
"You can tell me."
But Garrus seemed to have hit a sore point, and the girl stopped talking to him.
"That's not Shepard."
"How do you know? She's only what, ten years old at the most?"
"I know Shepard, and that's not her."
"No shit," Jack drawled, "Shepard's dead. Clone was never the same thing, or else Miss Cheerleader here would cheer her old man."
Miranda's face contorted a little, but she did not comment.
"The question's if she's enough of Shepard, up here," Jack gestured up to her temple. "And what we're supposed to do with her. We can't just throw her away."
Garrus looked aghast.
"That is out of the question," Said Dr. Chakwas. "This child did nothing wrong. We have to ensure that she is taken care of."
"She mentioned videos," EDI decided then to speak up, "This places her exact memories in question."
"Well memories or not, we still need to make sure she's taken care of."
"Well first of all we need to make sure there is no time bomb in her brain or something that turns her into a killing machine against aliens, or something!"
"Yeah I have intel," Jack scowled, "First thing my squad did after we found her was try to find clues. Science shit didn't make any sense to me, but we still gathered everything so Miss Cheerleader can have a run at it."
"I will take a look," EDI nodded at the biotic, "Maybe they will give us some insights into what we're dealing with."
Garrus turned away from everyone, one hand grasping his fringe. Tali laid a hand on his arm, but neither said anything.
"It appears Cerberus wanted to clone Shepard in order to preserve her genes," EDI reported after analyzing the data. "Since the Commander had died with no offspring, her genetic line also died with her. Cerberus managed to procure genetic samples of her and used them to generate a living embryo."
"Where the hell did they get the genetic samples?" Ashley asked.
"The Lazarus Project conducted by the old Cerberus had left sufficient specimens to work with. The procedure would have been much simpler than the project itself had been. Shepard was born and raised by the Cerberus scientists and trained to mimic the abilities her original counterpart had."
"Figures," Said James.
"From reports," EDI went on, "Shepard has no direct memories of her original form. She was shown videos and logs to trick her mind into believing she knew us. Though Shepard did demonstrate a certain level of familiarity with certain figures, it appears her familiarity is more akin to instinct rather than actual memory, perhaps due to deriving genes from her nervous system, or something similar. She had a good relationship with her Cerberus caretakers, who appeared to have taken...good care of her."
Jack spat a curse under her breath. No one else spoke.
"Must have been terrified when you were storming in there," Jacob said to her, "Probably stopped talking because of the trauma."
"Shut up."
"She was pretty resilient though," Said Kelly. "Still, someone should talk to her."
"Why did she only talk to me?" Garrus asked quietly. "Why did she only talk to me, if she does not actually remember anything?"
"I cannot tell you from the data," EDI said apologetically. "I can tell you that her cognitive development is precocious; she is very advanced for her age, which may be due to her upbringing as well as her genes. Her biotic skills are also more advanced than the Commander's, for no reason the Cerberus scientists were able to fathom."
"She's even stronger than the Commander?" Jeff exclaimed.
"According to the reports, that is very likely."
"Has to make up for the scrawniness somehow," Wrex shouldered Grunt, and the two laughed mirthlessly.
"If these Cerberus goons actually treat her well, no wonder she was defending them," James looked at Jack.
"Yeah, but she must have recognized me and decided to stop. Though she might not have seen the point by then. Tore all of the bastards apart way before she arrived on the scene."
Garrus sighed, bowing his head, while Tali touched his arm again.
"She is not Shepard," EDI said, "She is only Shepard's clone."
"She is the only thing we have of Shepard," The turian said solemnly.
Silence fell at this.
"Huh," James remarked, "Ten years after Lola dies, we find that there's a Lolita."
Everyone looked at him.
"What?" He remarked, "Not like I'm wrong."
Towards the end, it was the final showdown. No more opportunities to relax, no more opportunities to rest. They had a chance to voice their love for each other, and Shepard had told him that he would never be alone, even if she was gone and he was not. It was like she knew she would not survive this last stand, but everything had been so uncertain, the situation so dire, that Garrus had never picked up on it. Part of him also believed, somehow, that she would actually survive even if the rest of them did not. After all, she had actually died and came back, more determined than ever. If Death itself could not keep her down, how could a bunch of old machines?
But she was gone, and in the remains of their victory, the galaxy wandered, lost and confused. By all accounts, it was a sudden end; all the Reapers were gone, the Mass Relays were gone, and no one knew what was going on. Shepard had been the one to fully unite the galaxy, and in a way everyone was hoping she might help clean everything up now that the Reapers had gone.
She could not, however. She was no longer here to do so. Destroying the Reapers had been her last gift to the galaxy. She had nothing more to give.
It took five long years for Garrus to come to terms with it, for him to realize that this had been for the best. What more could Shepard do? Her moment of glory had come and gone. Shepard was a soldier, and soldiers thrive only in war. Perhaps if she had still been alive, the galaxy might have held itself together better than it is, but this was still nothing compared to when the galaxy itself had been in danger, rather than just disquieted. The Reapers were the highlight of her career, the climax of her life. Someone like Shepard was never destined to live the quiet life; soldiers as great as she was could never be satisfied with it. Their dreams of a future after the Reapers had been idealistic, naive. Over the years, Garrus had watched individuals descend from being the most important person in the world to becoming nothing, and after five years he had realized that this was exactly the fate Shepard had been spared. She would never know what it means to be unwanted, irrelevant, fallen from the heights she had reached when the Reapers loomed at the their doorstep, and that would be precisely what would have happened had she survived; after all, what could top saving the galaxy from a galactic threat? Even with all the petty bickering that arose when the dust settled, the new troubles, the stirring of new criminal organizations and new conflicts, nothing could compare to when Shepard had forged so many intergalactic alliances and led everyone to victory. It was not so much that the galaxy did not need her; they always needed people like Shepard. It was more that Shepard no longer needed the galaxy. She could obtain nothing more from it, and so she left. She had died gloriously, the most important person in the whole galaxy, the hero, the uniter, the greatest legend ever known in history, revered by all races across all systems. A warrior's death.
The only death Shepard had deserved.
The galaxy was ever-changing, however, and if two years had been all it took for people to start forgetting her, then there was no telling when Shepard would merely be another name scrawled on ancient ruins, a face no one recognized, a simple statue that represented things future generations would never fully comprehend. That was the sad truth of all things; they all eventually die, even those like Shepard. Five years, and Garrus knew Shepard had died the happiest she probably ever will be, knowing that she had given the galaxy an eternity to blossom and grow, never having to fear the ending of another cycle, and able to write their fates as they wish. Ten years, and Garrus knew that even if Shepard's name would be known by all, she would only be a historical figure, a name among all the other names that people had to memorize for classes and homework and exams. Shepard left only her deeds behind, not of herself.
Well ironically, thanks to Cerberus, that is not true.
Lolita, as everyone had started calling the girl, was not Shepard, and yet she was. She could not possibly have Shepard's wisdom or worldliness because she spent all her life in a Cerberus facility, but she had what anyone would expect from Shepard's daughter; her spirit. She did not even smell like Shepard, and Garrus knew when she grew up, even if she were the splitting image of the Commander, she would still not look exactly like Shepard.
But she was Shepard's flesh and blood.
She was the only thing Shepard had left behind, of herself.
"We can take her in," Tali insisted, "We can adopt her. I mean..."
"You two are both dextro," Miranda insisted, "And just because the Commander was not allergic to Garrus does not mean Lolita is not. The immune system is heavily based on physiology, not genetics."
"What," Jack scoffed, "You think you can do better than Garrus?"
Miranda made a face, but suddenly blurted out, "Yes. I think I can do better than Garrus. I am human, she is human. I am a clone, she is a clone. I might not be the perfect mother, but I always wanted a child, and despite what you lot think, Shepard meant a lot to me, and I would care for her daughter no less."
"She meant a lot to all of us," Jack spat, "She was the first real friend I ever had. She was Tali's sister. She was Garrus's lover. What makes you think you have the right to that kid any more than we do?"
"Garrus is a Spectre," Miranda lashed out, "He's going to go on dangerous missions all the time, and he makes dangerous enemies all the time. Remember Thane? Remember Kolyat? I live on the new Citadel. I live a civilian life, and if there is anything Shepard's daughter deserves, it is a life where people would not want to kill her all the time, either because of her or because of her father."
"You...you boshtet!" Tali suddenly cried, while Garrus fought to restrain the urge to tear the woman apart, "Garrus would never put us in danger!"
"You all suck," Grunt declared, the phrase sounding somewhat comical coming from him, "She should live with the krogan, be trained to resemble the warrior that she was, or at least as close to it as possible."
Wrex laughed at this. "Though judging from how she looks now, she won't last a week."
"I want to go with Miranda."
Silence fell abruptly. Lolita stood, calm and collected and outside her room. Garrus was not sure how long she had been listening to the conversation. Her face was blank, and her hands were folded in front of her.
"Hey," Jacob said to the girl. For the first time, the child smiled shyly, and it was at Jacob only.
"Hey," The girl lowered her eyes, and the smile faded.
Garrus stared. Not Shepard. Shepard never lowered her eyes like that. At least not when he knew her. Maybe she did as a child.
it was so confusing. Heartwrenching.
I'll be looking down. You'll never be alone.
"I want to go with Miranda," Lolita said again.
Silence descended for a moment.
"Well," Traynor murmured, "I guess that's that."
They disbanded momentarily to clear their thoughts. The child went up to Garrus, who was looking at the shuttle he came in on, thinking about all the times he and Shepard had sat in one of those, side by side, not speaking because they were tense for a mission or exhausted after one.
"She loved you, a lot."
Garrus looked down at the girl. "I know," He said quietly.
"I would have gone with you. I know you loved her too."
Garrus looked away from her. Then why pick Miranda?
"But I'm not the Commander," The girl went on, "I knew this when I realized I didn't like all the training. Didn't like fighting. Didn't like killing."
Shepard did not enjoy killing either. "Your...mother, tended to avoid conflict whenever possible. She...was probably better at negotiating than any politician."
"I know."
Of course you do, but you think seeing some videos and reading logs would mean that you know her?
"I want a normal life," Lolita went on, "One with parents who aren't soldiers, spectres, Shadow Brokers, krogan," she shrugged.
"What about Traynor, or Kelly?"
Lolita shrugged again. "Miranda's wanted a kid for a long time. I've seen her Shadow Broker dossier. I think she's the only one who would understand me. I'm not Commander Shepard. Mom is dead. I never knew her, but everyone expects me to be like her somehow, and I'm not." Tears welled up in her eyes. "I tried hard to be, but I don't want to try anymore. I want to be myself. Mom hated Cerberus, but if it weren't for Cerberus, I wouldn't be here."
Garrus felt a swell of pity. It was a miracle the child was willing to talk to them at all. Maybe her upbringing had made her value the old Normandy crew enough to forgive them, but still, he could imagine how terrified the girl had been when Jack led her squad in to destroy the facility.
"We weren't close," Lolita went on, "But I didn't hate them. I was afraid Jack was going to kill me too. I don't know why she didn't."
"She recognized you," Garrus said quietly. He was going to have to talk to Kelly Chambers, maybe the psychologist could help the child. There must be some form of trauma, even if the girl was not really showing it.
How hard it must have been, to grow up being told to emulate someone long dead. Possess the genes, possess the traits, possess the face and voice, but the heart is different. The heart is always different. That is why no clone is the same. Different souls, different identities, different fates. Still, he saw Shepard's strength in the child, her resilience and tenacity. There was never any question that the girl was simply unusual.
"Everyone's moved on," Lolita then said, "Miranda's the best of the best, and she's worked on Mom before. She knows what to expect, and she's a clone herself. She knows what I can do and what I can't do. I can't be Mom, even if I try. I don't think anyone else would understand." She looked up at Garrus with Shepard's eyes. "You've moved on too. You're with Tali now. I don't want to get in the way of that."
Garrus crouched down in front of her. "You would never get in the way. Don't ever think that. Tali and I loved your mother dearly, nothing could possibly make us happier than taking care of her daughter."
But Lolita shook her head. "It's not fair to Tali. She's living in Mom's shadow enough as it is."
"Tali would not mind."
"I know, but it still wouldn't be fair to her. Tali did a lot for you, helped you come to terms. It's not fair to her for you to drag Mom's ghost back to your lives when you've worked so hard to move on. She's already having to deal with the fact that there's always someone else in your heart." The girl ducked her head. "When you go to Heaven, would you look for Mom first, or Tali?"
Garrus was silent.
Ten years old...and as wise as the Commander. Garrus had honestly not even thought of his wife, with his feelings all jumbled together in light of these new developments. He knew Tali loved him, but it never crossed his mind just how brave the quarian had been to do so.
"Mom loved you."
"I know."
"She was happy when she died."
The turian was quiet for a while. "How do you know?"
Lolita replied with a straight face, showing that she was just Shepard enough that the Commander would never truly die. "Because she knew she had saved the people she loved. And she fucking kicked epic ass."
Twenty-five years after defeating the Reapers, Garrus was on his way out of the Council chambers with Ashley and James when he came across Shepard Lawson.
"Dr. Lawson," He pulled to a stop.
"Hi Garrus, Ashley, James. What were you doing in there?"
"Consulting." Both of them were too old to continue being spectres, but they were both heroes of the war against Reapers, and for that the Council extended the honor of keeping them as advisors.
"Can't tell me what about?"
"Nope," Ashley folded her arms, "You know how it works, kid."
"Aw," Shepard laughed.
"What are you doing here?"
"Meeting Miranda." Even as she spoke, Miranda veered around the corner. Strands of white now speckled through her hair, which was tied in a loose bun. She was wearing a long frock and a jacket, rather becoming of a woman her age.
"We're going out for lunch," Shepard said to Garrus. "Is Tali also here?"
"She's here."
"How are the kids?"
Garrus nodded. "Good."
"Same," Ashley nodded as well.
"Annoying the shit out of everyone," James chuckled, "But guess we wouldn't have it any other way."
"Garrus and Ashley," Miranda made a show of looking annoyed, "James. What are you three doing here?"
"Miranda," Ashley growled out, but gave Miranda a quick hug. "It's been ages. How have you been?"
"Dealing with beauracratic crap, as always when it comes to research."
Shepard chuckled.
"We're heading out to lunch," Miranda said, "Do you two want to join us? Is Tali here? Michael? Jane?"
"I'm leaving the Citadel in half an hour, sorry," Ashley shook her head, "Mike's not on the Citadel, he's still at home. I need to catch the flight back."
"Yeah, Jane's not here either," James said, "I have to run too, catching the shuttle in forty-five minutes."
"Tali and I have an appointment already," Garrus said apologetically. "Otherwise we would totally join you."
"Oh well," Said Miranda, "We should catch up sometime. Expect an invitation in the near future."
"Miranda!" Shepard looked aghast.
"What invitation?" Ashley asked.
"You'll see, "Shepard gave Miranda an annoyed look.
Twenty-five years old, a doctor. Garrus had an idea of what this invitation might entail. "Who's the lucky man?"
"Ah ah," Shepard waved a finger at him, "You'll know what the invitation is for when you get it."
"Please, former spectre, former spectre, and...former spectre." Ashley had caught on as well, "But if you want to hide it, that's fine. We'll wait for the invitation."
They laughed, while young Shepard blushed.
They talked a little more, before Ashley had to leave to find her ship. Garrus was also missing Tali.
"We better get going as well," Miranda said apologetically, "I'm starving."
"We'll see you around," Shepard waved.
Ashley, James, and Garrus watched as the two walked away. Shepard had grown into the splitting image of her mother, which was no surprise. Some people recognized the resemblance, some did not. It was easier than one would think to hide the fact that she was a clone. She did not have the Commander's military swagger, nor did she have the same sense of power and authority. She was a medical doctor, however, and had her own accomplishments that were worthy of respect.
She was what Commander Shepard would have been as a civilian.
One would argue that all that strength had gone to waste. The biotics, the training in her childhood...but somehow, it seemed appropriate that Commander Shepard would leave behind a healer in her wake. Shepard Lawson was living the life the Commander would have wanted for a daughter. It was not as exciting, but it was meaningful and...peaceful, in a way the original Shepard might not have been able to enjoy.
"She's still alive," Said Ashley.
"Freaking insane," James shook his head, "She's nothing like Lola, and yet she is. Think it's the genes, or the vids?"
"It's Shepard," Garrus replied, and they all knew which Shepard he was referring to. "She was always a force that even death couldn't handle."
They watched as the two women disappeared into the crowd before going their separate ways, with Garrus messaging Tali to locate her.
Commander Shepard of the Normandy, so inspiring that ultimately the galaxy could not allow her to die without living something behind. Something that would last, longer than the legend itself. Twenty-five years after her death, and her daughter is getting married, to pass on her strength and spirit. It definitely did not come to be the way Shepard would have planned; the Commander would never have imagined cloning herself, for one thing, or for Miranda Lawson to be the one to raise the clone, but looking back, Miranda had been the best one out of the old crew to raise Lolita. She had known Shepard's capabilities, she had known what it is like to be someone and yet not, to be a product of engineering rather than love, and she had loved the girl as much as she would her own biological child. Despite what people might say, Lolita was more like her mother than she thought. Shepard had always been one of the wisest, most foresighted people Garrus had ever known, and it seemed her daughter inherited this virtue.
Twenty-five years after Shepard's glorious death, Shepard lives on.
"Garrus!" Tali waved, brushing her hair back with her other hand.
Garrus's mandibles flared in a smile. Shepard had gotten exactly what she deserved. It was an honor to have known her, to have loved her and be loved by her, but Shepard had gotten what she deserved and he got Tali afterwards, which makes him the luckiest man in the galaxy.
"You boshtet," Tali joked when he went up to her, "What took you so long?"
"Just ran into Shepard," He told her, "She's having lunch with Miranda though."
"Oh, I missed them?" His wife sounded disappointed.
"Don't worry," He remarked, "We'll be seeing them soon enough. Miranda told me to expect an invitation."