This is the war that has perplexed us longer than, World War I, World War II, Vietnam War, and even the Earth vs. Covenant War, this war has lasted for centuries, a never ending power struggle, this isn't for World Domination, or liberation, this is just for control of the flag, this is Red against Blue, this is Capture The Flag.......

Random Blue Guy: When will the madness end, when I ask, when when when!

Winston: How about now.....

A Sniper shot was clearly heard throughout the whole Sidewinder outpost as another Blue Marine was dropped from his feet..

Winston: My sniper skill just perplexes me.

Scotch: Uhhh dude, not to mention the fact that you were standing directly behind him.....

Winston: Dude will you shut the fuck up? Why do you always have to ruin my glory.

Scotch: Because I hate your guts?

Winston: If you hate me so much then why don't you just put me out of my misery right here right now.

Scotch: If you're dead, who else can I make fun of?

Winston: There's Zero over there.

Scotch: Nah, he hasn't been the same ever since that, dun dun dun dun, Battle Creek incident.

Winston: Dude don't bring that up around me, flashbacks man, flashbacks.

Scotch: Oh sorry, anyways, when are we going to go over to the Blue Outpost and take there flag?

Winston: Will you stop your bitching about getting their flag, there's only about 7 Red Soldiers remaining, we need immediate back up.

Scotch: You just didn't say that out loud did you? Dude there could be blue spies all around here.

(Winston immediately began looking around.)

Winston: Nope don't see any.

Scotch: How do you know I'm not one.......

Winston: Because me and you both shipped to the Sidewinder outpost the same day???

Scotch: So....I could have been possessed.

Winston: Yeah.....anyways, we've received direct orders to camp at the Red Outpost to make sure our flag isn't captured until reinforcements arrived.

Scotch: Good thing this isn't the PC Sidewinder planet.

Winston: Oh yeah totally, the Red team not only have to stop the Blues from coming in from the front, but the Blue bastards can also go through the portals, sucks for them.

Scotch: Yeah, they totally got screwed. What's so important about these flags anyways?

Winston: I'm not sure, but the commander once told me that whatever color controlled all the flags, they would be the ones to actually control the future of mankind.

Scotch: You've actually had a conversation with the commander?

Winston: Yeah....so?

Scotch: I totally hate you now.

Winston: Like you didn't already?

Scotch: Why can't I have the conversation with the commander?

Winston: No offense Scotch, but I seriously doubt that the commanders definition of a conversation would involve porn and smut.

Scotch: That was just low man, funny, but low. Anyways we should head back inside, I'm freezing my ass off out here.

(Scotch and Winston both headed back into the Red Team base as they awaited for back up.)

Meanwhile Back At The Blue Base

(4 Blue Marines come running into the blue base yelling and shouting as they stop in front of the blue flag and infront of Nutz.)

Nutz:........What the fuck is this........You guys said you were going to hurrah, rant, rave, whatever all the way to the Red base, and return with their flag.

Marine 1:Well, we did yell and run.

Nutz: Let me guess......they fucked you up?

Marine 1: Well no not.....

Nutz: Oh yes I forgot, lamemans terms, they basically killed off most of you before you got there....

Marine 2: Yeah pretty much.

Nutz: Idiots....... did I not tell you, that you guys would get mowed down by their defense before you even got half way out there? For Christ sake, it's a blizzard out there, and you fools were actually dumb enough to attempt to run all the way over there in this weather....

(Bishop came down the Sidewinder ladder poking Nutz.)

Nutz: I'm probably going to regret asking this, but why in the hell are you poking me?

Bishop: I just wanted to let you know that I was scouting around and noticed that only 4 of the 16 Marines....

(He was then cut off by Nutz.)

Nutz: Let me guess, only 4 of the 16 Marines happened to return flagless.

Bishop: Wow, you're sidekick.

Nutz: It's not sidekick it's psychic you nubtard.

Bishop: That's what I said dumbass.

Nutz:........anyways, no I'm not psychic, it just so happens that these Marines think they can return to our base like this empty handed even though they promised us a flag.

Bishop: What should we do to them.

Nutz: Well, I think 4 soldiers are about to go homes to their families in body bags.....

4 Marines: WHAT!?!?!?

Nutz: Only kidding guys.

Bishop: Damn.....

Nutz: But next time you guys should listen to me since I am higher in rank than you nubs.

Bishop: Technically you only got to your position for kissing the Sarges ass.

Nutz: I didn't kiss his ass, I may have kissed around his ass like on his thigh, but I not once kissed his ass.

Bishop: Wait, so you actually did kiss his ass?

Nutz: Never tell anyone that.

Bishop: I won't, but I can't promise that these other 4 Marines won't. Marines you tell every other blue marine that you come in contact with what you just heard.

Marine 1: I don't know that sounds pretty mean.

Bishop: If you don't. I will KEEL YOU!!!!!!!!

All 4 Marines: Right away sir.

(The Marines scatter throughout the outpost.)

Nutz: Dude you suck....

Bishop: Was my KEEL YOU voice a little too over the top?

Nutz: No not at all.

(Zipper then entered the Blue Outpost.)

Zipper: Hey guys guess what I got.

Nutz: What is it?

Zipper: Guess idiot.

Nutz: Zipper you fucking piece of nubtard, what the fuck is it?

Zipper: Awwww you take all the fun out of everything. Just follow me.

(Nutz, Zipper, and Bishop all exited the outpost.)

WHAT DOES ZIPPER HAVE THAT IS SO IMPORTANT TO INTERUPT THE UNIMPORTANT DIALOGUE BETWEEN BISHOP AND NUTZ, ALSO, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE FOR THE RED TEAM TO RECEIVE BISHOP, AND FINALLY, WHAT THE FUCK IS A NUBTARD???

Nutz: Shut up nubtard.

OH SORRY, ANYWAYS, FIND OUT IN EPISODE TWO OF CAPTURE THE FLAG.