This is actually a story I wrote some time ago. I have read a story by She's a star (Lamentations of a Starry Eyed Twit) and it was from her I got the idea. It's not a secual or anything like that. It's my own story with my own ideas. The only thing she inspired me with was the diary-form writing. (Perhaps I stole the thing about Snape having Shakespear's whole work, but that's about it). I've been writing Snape/Sinistra stories for a while now. Anyway, hope you enjoy.

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Chapter 1

August 20th

The arrival

Saturday:

The summer vacation is over, and so the school begins once again. It's god to be back. It may sound funny, but I've missed the astronomy tower. It's kind of sad, really, especially if you think about what I've been doing all summer. Nothing! Pathetic. Well, there was this night (July 5th to be accurate) when I meet this wonderful guy named Garry. If it only hadn't turned out he was gay and had a boyfriend.

Then it was the day Melinda came to see me. She told me about her handsome husband and how good he was with everything.

"He is sooo wonderful. He's an amazing chef, he is so romantic and in the bed... Oh, he's a tiger, tjihi..."

Slut!

Anyways, I've been doing a lot of thinking. About you-know-who (not he-who-must-not-bee-mentioned, but you know, you-know-who). We haven't spoken all summer (which actually would be rather weird if we had), but I have seen him. A couple of times. Order meetings. I'm not as important to the order as he is, but still, I'm there once or twice. In the meetings that is. I wonder if he has been thinking about me. I bet he has...

August 21st

Staff meeting

Sunday:

Today we were called in for the first staff meeting this year. I sat in between Sibyl (who foretold I was going to die within the year and that I was going to find my long lost love very soon) and Minerva (who was quite tan). Dumbledore started as usual by introducing the new Defence Against Dark Arts teacher. (I forgot to tell you, he was there too. You-know-who. Right next to Dumbledore.)

The new teachers name was Celestine Norctem. Or so I think. I wasn't really paying attention. I was... cough busy with someone... I mean, something else. And it had absolutely nothing to do with him. Because he is still a bastard, and I don't like him.

So, the new teacher was woman. And a very beautiful one too. Long red hair, green eyes and a cute smile with bright shining white teeth. Well, she wasn't all that beautiful I think. She was very well-spoken. Former Slytherin. And she was very kind and loving. (I wonder why she was a Slytherin and not a Ravenclaw.) The other teachers loved her. Even he did. Well, at least that was the way it seemed. He didn't come with sarcastic comments like usual. Still, he didn't smile or anything. I bet he doesn't like her, after all. Who does he like? Except me... I'm not completely sure, but I think he likes me, he just wont admit it. One thing is certain, I don't like him. Who can like a snarky old git who can play the piano and the entire work of Shakespeare? Well not me, that's for sure. He is a bastard. He's an old bat that loves to punish people. I should know, cause I've seen the faces to the first years after their first potion lesson.

August 22nd

First lesson

Monday:

The first years this year was very cute. Even the Slytherins. There was this one girl, Moesha MacMillon, who answered all my questions correctly. A Ravenclaw. She was adorable. I see a lot of myself in her. She will go far in this life.

I decided to go to breakfast this morning. A woman has got to eat you know. And I sat at my ordinary seat next to Severus. But it had nothing to do with that snake. And the new teacher, Celestine, was sitting on his other side. Not that Severus seemed to care. Not that I care what he thinks or anything.

We didn't talk at all during the breakfast. I was talking to Filius who had much to tell me about his summer vacation. It was rather interesting to hear about his discovering in Egypt. Did you know that in the afterlife, the old Egyptians wanted to attain was thought of as a bigger and better version of the earthly Egypt? Severus was talking to Celestine about some dark art things. I think Severus knows more about the dark art that Celestine, but Albus won't let him have the job. He applies for it every year you know.

August 24th

Snowflake formal

Wednesday:

December 11th there will be arranged a prom called the Snowflake formal. Victoria's idea. Albus thought it was a wonderful idea. A break from all the exams. I like it too. I love the romance. Flowers in white and red and candle lights. If only there was a handsome and kind male teacher at this school. Cause we don't have one you know. Filius is very kind, but he's a dwarf. And Albus is too old. And not to mention Severus! There is nothing kind about him. Not that his is handsome or anything. Cause he's not. There is nothing attractive about him! And the new DADA teacher is a woman. I really need a boyfriend. I did have one for not so long ago. Okay, so it was five years ago, but still. He was so perfect. Handsome, kind and generous. I can't remember why it didn't work out. It might have something to do with me always talking about what a bastard Snape was. No I don't think so.

August 27th

Gilderoy Lockhart posters

Saturday:

I wish Dumbledore could hire a new handsome teacher. The posters of Gilderoy Lockhart I had hanging in my office isn't as much of a comfort anymore. I decided to take them down after Severus came to visit me last night.

"Rather pathetic isn't it? Having posters of a mad man in you office?".

So, fearless as I am, I answered:

"Its a much better decoration that jars full of dead animals, don't you think?".

Of course Severus didn't agree. We never agree on anything. Except that Sibyl is completely mad perhaps. Long lost love... Next she will be telling me Severus is the love I was looking for. And that is very unlikely. Cause he's a bastard, and I don't like bastards. Besides, he is nothing like Gilderoy, my prince charming. He is wonderful (Gilderoy, not Snape). Don't you think? What am I doing? Of course you don't think. You're just a notebook. This is hopeless.

September 1st

Three broomsticks

Thursday:

The first Hogmeade weekend is over. Albus thought it would be a good idea if Severus escorted me to the Tree Broomsticks. Both Severus and I objected, but for no good. He is powerful man, that Dumbledore.

We didn't speak much. I think he's still angry about the little accidence we had last year (I sort of walked in on him while he was... Eh... Still in his boxer shorts. It was very early. They were black, by the way. The boxer shorts. Not that I starred at them or anything. I barely even noticed. I have no interest of knowing what kind of boxer shorts he wears. He is a lot skinnier that I had though. Not that I was looking at his body. Because I wasn't. Well, only for a few seconds). It was a long walk in silence. I tried to make contact, but he refused to answer me. I was only trying to be nice, and do you know what he said to me?

"Do you ever shut up, you bloody pathetic little four-eyes?"

Bastard!

"You know, Severus, I have apologized for not knocking on your door a long time ago. It's in the past, why don't you just forget it?"

"Shut up", he just sneered at me and continued to walk.

Its just an act. I know he still loves me. Not that I want him to. What am I doing? I don't have to explain myself to a notebook.

It went fine, for a while. After we had seated ourselves (which took an eternity since Snape insisted on leaving. His job was to escort me and had for filled it.), we started talking. It was quite nice in the beginning.

"I'm so thirsty. Aren't you, Severus?"

"No"

"Aren't you going to order something to drink?"

"No"

"How about if I pay for it?"

"Goddamnit woman, I said NO!"

"Fine, suit yourself."

"Thank you."

I was only trying to be nice. Some people just don't appreciate hospitality. Like bastards. I should have known. Blood-sucking bat.

"What do you think about Celestine Norctem?"

Silence

"Severus?"

"What now?"

"What do you think about the new teacher? Celestine Norctem?"

"She's better than the ones we've had the last few years."

"Better than Lockhart?"

"Yes, professor Sinistra, better than Lockhart."

"Severus, I've told you a million times. Just call me Quintessa."

"And I've told you a million times that I prefer to call you professor Sinistra."

"Stubborn old bat"

"At least it's better than an old wench that acts like a foolish teenager."

"I don't act like a foolish teenager!"

"Oh no? Do you not have posters of Gilderoy Lockhart hanging in you office? Do you not have all the books he has ever written? And do you not kiss the note with his autograph on every night before you go to sleep?"

"For your information, I don't have posters of him hanging in my office anymore. And at least I have an idol that is alive. Shakespeare died a long time ago you know!" (What am I saying? I love Shakespeare!)

"Shakespeare is a respected writer. And he is much greater than Gilderoy Lockhart will ever be. He might be dead, but his career, unlike others is not based on the way he looks."

(Well he's a lot better looking that you will ever be! Not that he is good-looking. Severus, not Gilderoy.)

"Good day, professor" I said and left. It wasn't until later I discovered I had walked out there without paying. Severus got stuck with the bill. It didn't actually help on your relationship. Not that we have one! Because we don't. I'd rather have a love-affair with Moody. Not that I and Severus have a love-affair. And perhaps not with Moody... Urgh... Never mind, you know what I mean.

September 4th

Macbeth

Sunday:

A play? How delighted. And not any play, but "Macbeth". It is to be preformed on the night of the snowflake formal for the students. And I have already been given a character. One of the three witches. How exciting. Victoria and Sibyl are also witches. Everybody got a part. Even Severus. You can imagine what part he will be playing. Macbeth! He didn't want to. Hmm... He said it like something like this:

"I've got more important things to do than being a part of a play."

"But Severus, I would be delighted if joined us. You do, after all, know more about Shakespeare than anybody else in this room." (Albus)

"Sneer" (Severus, how original of you!)

We will be practicing every Sunday until the snowflake formal. Sir Nicholas is the instructor. He was almost touched to tears when Albus told him. (Which is completely impossible, since he can't cry. He is after all a ghost). Celestine is playing the role as Lady Macbeth. Snapes wife. Interesting... I'm glad I didn't get that part! Hagrid is playing Duncan, the king of Scotland, and Argus (our beloved, yeah right, caretaker) plays Banquo, Macbeths close friend. Last but not least, Albus plays the old man (who is an important character to the theme that Macbeth is an example of royalist propaganda).

September 5th

Kiss

Monday:

I've read through the manuscript. Celestine and Severus (or Macbeth and his wife) has a kissing scene. It surprises me that Severus didn't object to it when he knew what part he was going to play. After all, he has read every piece Shakespeare has ever written. And Macbeth is not exception. Maybe he has forgotten about it. Even I forget things now and then. Its not like he wants to kiss her... Is it? Of course not! She's a young, beautiful, red-headed woman with an amazing white smile and burns for defence against dark art subjects... Heh... When I think about it, I guess that says it all.

But why didn't she object? I mean, I would never in my life kiss that snake! I'd rather kiss Argus. Come to think about it, I have kissed both of them, and I rather kiss that mean bastard than Argus again. It has only happened once. Someone had put alcohol in my drink on the Yule ball, and I might have taken just a little too much. It was disgusting. (Argus, not Snape). Not that Snape wasn't disgusting either. Yuck...

September 8th

Confrontation of the seductress

Thursday:

She didn't know. But she does now! I told her. She was quite surprised. Let's see, it went something like this:

"Celestine, could I borrow you for a moment? It's about the play."

"Sure, Quintessa"

"I read through the manuscript some nights ago, and I wondered if you have done the same?"

"Unfortunately I have not had the pleasure to read through the script yet."

"You see, there is a scene when your character and Macbeth himself get intimate, and I thought I'd just let you know before you accept the role you have been given. If you want we could shift?"

"Intimate in what way?"

"Well, kissing and that sort of things."

"Oh, I don't mind. It's only a play after all. But thank you for being so considerate. It's very kind of you, Quintessa."

"You do understand that it means you have to kiss Severus?"

"Yes"

"I've done it before; it wouldn't be a problem for me to do it again. When the damage is already done…Well you know what I mean."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you two had a relationship."

"Relationship? Me and Severus? No, no, no! There is nothing between the two of us, except cruel comments and insults."

"Then why do you want the part?"

"I don't want it. God no! I'm only thinking of your situation as the new teacher. Kissing one of the other teachers already... Albus is asking very much of you."

"I think I can handle Severus. But thanks again for your concern."

"Are you sure? Well, okay then. You're welcome."

It seems to me as she wants to kiss him. Who would want to kiss that... that... bloodsucking-bat? Well, she is new, and apparently she doesn't know what he's like. And when she finds out, Ill be there waiting to step in.

I wonder if she fancies him... What am I saying? Celestine fancies Severus? Not very likely... Just as unlikely as myself liking him! Which is unthinkable... Okay, maybe unthinkable isn't quite the word. I know I'm very desperate to get a boyfriend, but never will I try to seduce Snape!

September 9th

None

Friday:

Bastard!

September 11th

An actor within

Sunday:

Practice day. It was very fun. It amazed me how good Severus is at acting. It was so natural for him. He has read the script, but unlike everybody else, he doesn't need it to read his lines. He already knows them. I really didn't think he was such a great fan of Shakespeare. To know the whole play by heart, well you've got to respect that. It's really annoying when he gets like that. When he does things that makes me respect him. I don't want to respect a bastard! But, I do...