Author's Note: I know I'm working on Turtle Dove, but this little plot bunny wouldn't go away. This was inspired in-part by CJthestoryteller's story "Fractured Trust", based on the episode "Broken Foot", only I decided to write an extended talk between Leo and April, the latter calling him out on his crap involving Karai. Well, anyway, enjoy this drabble!

The atmosphere outside the dojo was enough to make anyone scream and pound their fists in frustration. That certainly proved to be the case with Leonardo right now. The leader-could he even call himself that now-sat on the steps leading into their sanctuary for meditation and training to await the news on his unconscious brother. Well, there was another, personal reason he wasn't in the dojo hovering over Donatello's prone body: he didn't exactly feel welcome in there. Not by his still-conscious brothers, not by April, not even by his father. After what transpired tonight, he couldn't blame them.

Why did he even agree to start his crusade? It wasn't his crusade, he remembered, it was Karai and that Shinigami girl's vendetta spree against the now-absent Shredder. He thought it wouldn't get actual people hurt. All it involved would be destroying chemical factories, burning illegal accumulations of cash, and perhaps blowing up a Foot Bot factory. Sure, property damage was always a factor, but no person got hurt, right? Tonight, he found himself shaken out of his foolish delusions when someone DID get hurt, and it wasn't just any random person feeling the burn of Karai's lust for revenge.

It was Donnie.

Leo didn't realize his brothers used the T-Phones to track him to Auman Chemicals, and he didn't realize they made their way inside right before the bombs went off. The only indication he got came when he saw Raphael and Michelangelo carrying their unmoving brother to the Party Wagon. He left Karai and Shinigami behind to see what happened, and right away things went even worse.

"What are you guys doing here!?"

He remembered his question all-too-well, and how inappropriate it was. He knew he should've asked, "Will Donnie be okay?" instead of insinuating, "Why are you intruding on my plans?". In other words, he felt more concerned about the guys ratting him out to Master Splinter (no pun intended) instead of the well-being of his brother. He knew now every rational thought went out the window when it came to Karai. Just the sound of her voice made him morph into a different person; a split-personality, almost. Truthfully, after he started helping Karai with her so-called crusade to spite her former father, he found himself getting an addictive thrill from it; a drug he needed more and more of to feel satiated. Just knowing he was disobeying his father, keeping secrets from his brothers and friends, causing a little mayhem...it gave him a dangerous high. As with all drugs, given enough time, he would escalate in his methods to obtain his quick fix, not matter who got hurt in the process. This wasn't supposed to be him.

"Leo, what were you thinking?"

The shamed leader turned his head and found April standing outside the dojo doors. The shock and worry on her face from before disappeared to make room for the anger and disappointment in her features. The now-kunoichi actually planted a seed of intimidation in his mind because he knew that she was almost as protective of Donnie as they were, if not more so. Actually, he knew not to mess with her when she was about to literally stab Shinigami in the back during their second confrontation; it made him question why she kept that Soul Star shard. When April took a step down, Leo opened his mouth to give some sort of excuse, but the redhead halted his attempts.

"I could've told you teaming up with those two was a bad idea!" April chastised, glaring down at the lead turtle.

The now-kunoichi took the moment to fully take in Leo's appearance…and this certainly wasn't the Leo she knew. The ocean-blue eyes framed by a black mask felt so foreign to her, as though he became a mere shadow of her friend. The Leo she knew wouldn't dress in black armor and a black mask, as though he himself were a Foot ninja. The Leo she knew wouldn't keep secrets from his family, especially when those secrets caused damage all over New York. The Leo she knew wouldn't recklessly put the lives of his brothers and friends in danger. The Leo she knew wasn't a rebel without rational thought. This turtle that had Leo's face and voice and name…she didn't know him.

"…I don't know." The voice coming from the once-confident leader seemed so unsure, and so scared. "I guess…I guess I thought I could control the situation." He knew that was the lamest excuse he could come up with, but he couldn't think of anything else that could possibly lessen April's anger. What could he come up with that wasn't a weak apology? "April, I…"

"You still don't get it, do you?" April asked sharply, moving herself so that she stood towering over Leo. "Karai's going to do what she wants. You're supposed to be OUR leader; you don't just abandon your team like that."

Leo suddenly stood to his feet, frustration consuming him and allowing him to snap. "I didn't abandon you guys! I was just trying to keep an eye on her! I wanted to make sure she didn't get herself hurt, April! I know she's going to keep on after revenge, and she won't stop until either Shredder's dead or she's dead! I don't want it to be the latter!"

April's features hardened, and Leo found himself irritated that he couldn't read her. Finally, the redhead spoke softly, "…What's happened to you, Leo? After the invasion, and whenever Karai's involved, you've turned into a completely different person…and that person literally scares me. Lately, you care more about trying to impress her and trying to be the big hero that it's like…like we don't matter."

Leo's jaw hung open at April's somber accusation. "What…of course you guys matter! You guys matter more to me than Karai or her quest for revenge!"

"…Then prove it." April challenged, fists clenched tightly. "Prove we matter. For once, stop acting like we're just extra baggage, especially Donnie. Prove to us that you trust us…that we matter more than some stupid crush you have."

The pride inside Leo refused to let him back down, however. "Donnie did plenty of stupid things over YOU. Why does he get a free pass and why do I get all the grief?"

With narrowed eyes, April answered with one sentence, "Donnie actually learned from it." She turned on her heels to fully face Leo and stepped threateningly closer to him. "Donnie grew up. Donnie gave me space to let me make my own decisions. Donnie doesn't risk the lives of his brothers just to impress me. Donnie doesn't try to play the big hero game because he thinks he's the only one worthy."

Leo wanted to fight back with another argument, but found his tongue unable to throw anything out. Why couldn't he find anything to say back? The answer was simple: April was right. He became a different person when the former Foot Princess came into play; he turned into a carbon-copy of Karai. Instead of treating his brothers like brothers, he treated them like his personal soldiers. He started expecting Splinter to constantly shower him with praise, give him the golden child treatment, and when he got chastised like he did tonight, he wallowed in self-pity. In fact, when his father wanted to move quickly to heal Donatello, he stalled him in doing so because he worried too much about himself than his brother.

In the amount of time since they were in space and came back home, he became the rebel. Raph and Donnie became the leaders when he stopped fulfilling his role. He literally became a textbook case of Jekyll and Hyde with his recent actions. All because he wanted a girl to see him as her savior.

Seeing Leo clam up, April sighed and headed back for the dojo. "Leo…you have a lot to think about. Whatever you do next, just remember your priorities."

When April disappeared back into the dojo to see Donnie's progress, Leo collapsed back onto the steps and kept his head down. Her accusations played over and over in his head like a broken record, his reckless actions followed suit, and then the times he pushed Donnie so much when he didn't put in any effort. His head rested in his gloved palm, and he could feel moisture gather up in the fabric of his black mask.

He no longer deserved the role of leader.

He no longer deserved the role of brother.

He found himself a much-more-deserving title.

A lost cause...just like Karai.

What did you guys think? Do you guys think Leo got off too easy, or was April spot-on?