Memories of having a connection
I'm sitting in the pub with a glass of Bollinger. I miss you. I'm remembering everything we had together. Why hadn't you come in the pub with me? I wanted you here Gene but you just sent me in here to pub heaven. On my own.
I remember when I first met you Gene. I'd just found myself in this world, I didn't know what I was doing here. I was dressed as a prostitute. Red dress, Gold necklaces, black stockings, red heels and a fur coat. There was the sound of engines. There in front of me was this gleaming red Quattro shining in the sun. Those boots. Those brownie coloured snakeskin boots and there was you Gene Hunt! With your black suit, perfect hair and your gorgeous eyes. I fainted and woke up to find myself outside the police station, your cleverly built little world. You picked me up with your soft gentle hands and carried me into the station, I leant my neck into the crook of your neck.
You were a stubborn, obnoxious bastard at times but somehow your presence made everyone feel safe. Every night you'd go to Luigi's after a long day's work and I'd come along with you. When you weren't looking and nor was anybody else I'd look into your eyes. Our eyes never locked properly though did they Gene? There might've been a glimpse at times, a glimpse of hope but you wouldn't let me in would you?
It was the day of the royal wedding and you were still too tied into your job to even just stop work for one day. I nearly got blown up in Danny Moore's car! Would you have cared Gene? Even if you did you wouldn't have shown it. I remember you distinctively telling me that you wanted to stamp my arse, I was dead set against it wasn't I? I gave in though, I did it for you Gene and yet you still treated me like shit!
There was that rape case wasn't there? You didn't believe Trixie just because she was a "Sex Worker" I believe her though didn't I? Because that's what proper coppers do! I made up a lie didn't I? Saying I was once a prostitute and for a few seconds you believed me. I quote you saying after I told you the truth about how your preconceptions inform your judgement about others. "I would rather go with one of them" and you pointed directly at the prostitutes. You continued, "Than waste my money on some bitter, twisted, messed up, clenched arsed, toffee nosed bitch like you!" It showed what you really thought of me didn't it! I'd had enough of you and your stupid ways. My hand reached out and gave you a hard slap around the face. And if you STILL hadn't had sense knocked into you, you said "You feel better now?" I answered you with a punch in the chin, being the childish man you were at times you didn't speak to me until we got to Luigi's that night. You deserved it.
Remember I slept with that "Thatcherite wanker"? You'd told me to go to bed alone but I didn't listen did I? I woke up the next morning feeling so rough and you called me into your office and we had a full on row didn't we? I didn't want to argue with you Gene, I really didn't.
Oh yeah and then there was the vault incident wasn't there? I wouldn't have ended up in there if it wasn't for you in the first place. You wanted to go into the vault to get a document and me being me I came with you. And when I accidently locked us in there you started shouting at me didn't you. I was surprised how Sam Tyler had put up with you for so long. We sat there boiling didn't we? You took your shirt off; I took my pink blouse off. I thought I was going to die in an underground vault with you. What a way to die eh. I felt like crying but I didn't show it so instead I said to you, "I can't die, can I?" you just looked at me with your gorgeous eyes, I asked again "Can I?" you just continued to look at me; held your arm out. I leaned on you; your hand rested on my shoulder; my hand lay on your chest, I then looked up deep into your eyes. We had a connection. I could see it. I could tell. Then I closed my eyes.
How could I forget the fridge? Chas and Joan Cale. Remember earlier on that day you'd thrown me off the team just because I'd gone and got some evidence for YOUR stupid case. I'd gone to find Chas Cale about the bloke called Billy who'd been murdered. Joan had hit me over the head with a pan, I fell to the floor and I couldn't move. She and Chas had then tied me up and Joan dragged me into the freezer. I kept screaming. I needed you Gene, I really did. I thought you weren't going to come for me but you did! I could see a clown but then I see you. My vision was slightly blurry and a single tear fell down my face before I lost consciousness. I remember waking up and seeing you towering above me. I gently cupped your face. I could see it we had a connection.
The TV in my flat. The clown. He spoke to me. He told me he was going to take someone. I thought it was going to be you Gene, I really did. You did that interview for me on the TV you was dead set against doing it but you gave in. That bloke Gil Hollis, the charity worker. He had a gun didn't he, he came for you. We were just coming out of Luigi's and were walking up those concrete steps. We got to the top and I was talking to you Gene, do you remember what we were saying? "Are you waiting for a grovelling apology to serve your wounded male ego? I said to you, you replied with, "If you'd care to drop to your knees in front of me, I will not object." I just looked at you. You held your bottle of champagne up and there was a gunshot, I thought it had hit you. Fortunately it hadn't it had hit your bottle. You shouted at everyone to get back inside, I flinched as I ran down the stairs as there was another gunshot. I jumped on the floor and you jumped on top of me as if you were trying to protect me from harm. The only thing was I didn't imagine that when you were lying on top of me we were going to be here. You wanted to go outside and see what Gil wanted; being the hard man you think you were. I didn't want you to go I was so terrified it was going to be you who were going to die. I grabbed your arm as you went to leave, and you said to me "I'm not dying in a trattoria" You pulled your arm away and I held your hand, You pulled away and went outside, I couldn't leave you on your own if you was going to die so I followed you outside. We talked to Gil together didn't we? As a proper team, we had a connection. Gil chucked the gun towards you but he didn't pull the trigger, you might've had a slight knock when the gun knocked you but it was better than being shot wasn't it? I couldn't have been happier but I didn't show my emotions. Gil ran off and Shaz followed him. It was her wasn't it! NO! Gil stabbed her by accident when we finally got to them. I tried to revive her, I thought she was dead but she wasn't. She breathed. But you being you, you let Chris kick 10 types of shit out of poor Gil. He didn't deserve that Gene! You tried to take me home but I pushed you away.
It came to the day that it was the day my parents were supposed to die. Even then we were arguing over different things. You were having Lord Scarman come to visit your station and you wanted it spic and span. I kept my distance from the station as much as I could and on the way accidently injured Ray. You were far from impressed. I came back to the station and was writing on the white board about the car bomb that was going to happen. Lord Scarman asked me what I was doing and I told him about the car bomb that hadn't even gone off yet. You went mad at me when we got in the office. I arrested my parents didn't I? To try and save their lives but oh no. Do you remember what you did? You let them go! You were a stupid man. You'd basically just killed them. Now they were going to be blown up! And it's your fault your bastard! I wanted to hate you but I couldn't bring myself to. You were too important and crucial to my escape out of this world. I needed to at least try and stop this happening though. Someone had to. You drove me to where the bomb was going to go off. It happened though. There was a loud bang and the car was in flames with my parents inside. I fell to the floor and just screamed. You'd ran up the hill and taken the little girls hand, all that time I thought it was her godfathers hand. It wasn't. It was you. You took that little girls hand. You took my hand.
Hope you like it so far. I'm trying to get chapter 2 together and there should be a chapter 3 hopefully within the next few months. I'm not sure when I'll be uploading them though because I've got GCSE's coming up. I know before I've said I'm going to put chapters up and I haven't. I promise I will try and get these up as soon as possible. But for now please R&R. peace&love GeneHuntsGirl.