The new Normandy was strange to Shepard, she felt aware that she was being deceived into working with Cerberus. It was all very subtle and very well done, Shepard thought. Bringing Joker and Dr. Chakwas, making every aspect of the ship to resemble the original which Shepard felt so much affection for, and yet there were slight upgrades here and there to make the commander feel that this was a step forward. They really should have hidden the bugs a bit better though if she were to truly fall for it.

Shepard was also not going to mistake the Cerberus outfits (which were ghastly) for the Alliance blues which were usually dotted about her ship, unless Miranda had added a few upgrades to her eyes as well.

There was also a very different feel to this ship; the original Normandy had been full of people complaining about aliens onboard but there was a feeling of gentle harmony now - probably because at this moment the entire crew was human. However, given that Cerberus was a pro human terrorist group she couldn't help but wonder just how they would all work together once she started her recruitment missions. She wouldn't tolerate working alongside racists and xenophobes but Shepard had been taken aback when she actually spoke with the crew. They were not the phantoms that the Alliance made out, at least on a more human level.

Jacob had been more pleasant in their initial introduction and seemed ready and willing to help in any way possible when she went to chat with him in the armoury. In truth, he seemed both intimidated and in awe. He was nice enough and clearly a good soldier but the last thing she wanted was an attachment or a distraction. This mission needed to be completed quickly and Shepard was feeling somewhat trapped.

Miranda had been responsible for bringing her back from death but their introductions had been less than smooth. Miranda had saved Shepard's life by yelling orders at her but as soon as they were on an equal footing Miranda couldn't hide her distrust. Shepard felt no resentment towards this and despite Lawson's aloof demeanour Shepard had found herself intrigued by this bold operative. It was quite refreshing to not have someone in awe of her as soon as she met them. Miranda was downright sceptical of her abilities and Shepard felt that it would be a fun challenge just to prove her wrong.

Miranda was so composed with every movement she made, so refined, and Shepard fought like a bull in a china shop. Shepard thought they might make a good pairing in command, if Lawson ever softened towards her or Shepard could resist winding her up. Shepard felt that Miranda's eyes often glinted with an unspoken challenge for her and it wound her up something rotten.

Shepard was confident that with time they would learn to work with her, or at least respect her command. She made a gifted leader because of her perhaps childish characteristic of never being unable to accept any limitation and still, in her heart, believing that anything was truly possible. It's what had enable her to take down Saren after all.

She also recognised why she was able to attract a good team; she was so open and inviting with everyone. She did not believe that a leader should be separate because that was not a good way to gain trust. It was strange that she so often found herself chosen for certain duties when the idea of being a leader did not sit well with her; she often just saw herself as one of the team but that's also why those around her trusted her for she would not forget the value of their lives.

However, while she could count many friends (or at least she still hoped so) they would often be left wondering just who Shepard was. Her pride often got in the way of certain connections as she would confide in no one, hating the idea that she seemed weak or should be a burden to someone else.

Shepard pulled at her chin slightly where one of her scars were- in truth, they'd already started to face after just one mission and she was confident that within a week or so Chakwas would be giving her the all clear but it was still strange. Apart from a few red scars, Shepard looked exactly as she had done two years ago and she figured she should be grateful to have missed out on ageing. Her long thick, dark red hair went past her shoulders and she had a long but chopped fringe which had a few years ago, attracted ridicule as she so looked the part of a wild soldier and sometimes acted it on the battlefield but now the gazes which followed her were often of admiration and her natural beauty was seen as charismatic. Her skin was pale, she was slim and slender but not skinny and also stoically toned. Her muscles were clear from under her uniform, even her toned thighs, but she was not larger for them, her body perfect for agility and stealth but also capable in hand to hand combat. There were only two physical features which Shepard took pride in: her hands which were slightly large but with very slim fingers which were so adept when she played the piano back when she was a child, and her deep green eyes that were like marble but so often had a twinkle to them.

Cerberus had rebuilt her to be used against this new threat the reapers posed, but there was an overwhelming sense of guilt. Nobody else had four billion spent on them to bring them back from the dead. She didn't even have a family while over twenty other sets of families and friends mourned those who were lost in the attack on the Normandy.

She was also, perhaps childishly, rather put out by the Alliance and the lack of interest from her so called friends and both of which seemed to be doing almost nothing about the reapers- from what The Illusive Man said. Illusive Man...really, what fool calls themselves that?

She was surrounded by this new group where she had only ever heard bad things...and sometimes come across their operations which can gone catastrophically wrong. Tali hadn't even seemed that pleased she was alive, but maybe now Tali thought of her as a racist. Would Wrex, Garrus and Liara feel the same?

She sighed, this was life now and it was a very confusing one to make sense of and she didn't know if there was anybody besides Joker and Chakwas she could trust yet.

She could feel Kelly keep glancing at her from where she stood at her terminal. Chambers had been immediately warm and friendly, but perhaps too much so. She liked that Cerberus had put enough thought into the fact that they might need somebody to talk to but she was also aware that anything that was said was probably going to go in a report. This was the issue- Cerberus was doing everything right on paper but there wasn't any trust.

Shepard logged off and made her way down to the next floor and to the door she was dreading going through, but realising that she was supposed to be a fearless spectre she brushed her wild red hair out of her eyes and decided to suck it up and just get on with it.

"Miranda, have you got a minute?"

"Of course, I'm sure you have a lot of questions." She responded in a voice must gentler than Shepard was expecting.

She couldn't especially blame Miranda for her attitude back on the station. Her team had been pretty much decimated all for Shepard. She was also well aware of the fact that despite her own love for getting to know everyone and everything, not everybody shared that particular characteristic and Miranda had no reason to act like they were best of friends.

Shepard listened carefully to Miranda's somewhat romanticised version of Cerberus. It made her deeply uneasy to know just how much power the Illusive Man wielded with nobody to keep him in line. He had incredible resources and committed fighters at his disposal by the sounds of things so if he ever directly threatened the Alliance or the galaxy he would make for a formidable opponent.

Miranda was also quite unexpectedly forthright in revealing just how much genetic modification she had received, which Shepard was rather taken aback by.

"...even my looks, they were all designed to give me an edge..." Miranda trailed off.

Shepard burst into giggles and to her mortification found she couldn't stop.

"Are you laughing at me?" Miranda cut across sharply.

"No, not really...not you..." Shepard desperately tried to regain control, "...it's just...I'm sorry, I'm just picturing this absurd rich white guy sitting in this boardroom with pie charts surrounded by advisors all debating the proportions of your chin or how knobbly your knees should be..."

Shepard did descend into hysterics this time and Miranda stared at her for one moment before allowing a shadow of a smile to trace her lips.

"I think he was more interested in giving me good strength in case anybody got out of line..." She quipped.

"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you." Shepard was sincere even though mirth was still threatening to overwhelm her.

"No...it's nice. He was absurd. The man was completely ego maniacal. Just one more reason I had to get away from him." Miranda spat each syllable with disgust at having to think about him.

"And you did. You're free now..."

"Yes, and doing vital work for Cerberus."

Miranda was quickly back on the offensive again, trying to get Shepard to believe in the cause.

"I don't like Cerberus...at least what I've seen. They've lacked any sort of moral restraint but I'm also under no illusions about the Alliance. They've failed to act many times, committed crimes of their own, have a distrust of aliens and now are doing little against the reapers. The one thing I expect to be able to count on is this ship and the people inside it. They're what matter to me, the rest is politics which can quite frankly go to hell as the reapers are a much more important topic which demand our focus."

For the first time Shepard sensed some respect start to come through in Miranda's eyes. She was beginning to understand that Shepard would respect her and fully work with her for the sake of the mission, and would not judge or undermine the relationship with Cerberus. However, she was also making it very clear that she expected the same from Lawson.

"I'm sorry about your team on the Lazarus station. I wish I had been able to help more."

Miranda seemed surprised by this.

"Shepard, they knew the risks. It was my fault, Wilson was a traitor. I suspected as much for a while but I couldn't do anything until you were in a position to be woken up."

"So you kept him there?"

Miranda hesitated for a second, as though trying to work out how best to express something.

"The mission, which we all volunteered for, was clear - we had to bring you back."

Great, Shepard thought bitterly, yet more people have lost their lives while I was deemed worthy of protection.

"One last thing..." Shepard mused, "why did you tell me about your genetic modification?"

"You have a right to know what each member of your squad can bring to the team and I'm here to serve you, Cerberus and humanity however you see fit."

Shepard reflexively bit her tongue. She did not like the idea at all of her squad being used for her. She wanted people along on missions because they fully wanted to be. She observed Miranda for a few seconds. She was tough to figure out; she was clearly dedicated to humanity which was admirable. Few others would take on this fight - look at Tali's reaction, and how her old friends had disappeared- but Miranda didn't seem to view herself as an autonomous being. She seemed fiercely independent and yet seemed to lack any true belief in herself; the only time she had allowed herself any credit was when talking about the genetic manipulations her father had given her.

Shepard gave Miranda a final nod of dismissal and left, wondering if this team was ever going to feel as strong a family as the last one did.