Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me. All rights go to JK Rowling/Warner Bros. I do not profit in any way.

The Darkest Night

Lily was the one who woke Severus from his daze.

The redheaded teenager walked over to him quickly, smiling, and looking straight into his deep black eyes.

"Li...lily?" He gasped, looking round behind him, to see no-one there. "You're speaking to me?"

"Severus," she sighed, lowering her green eyes to the floor, much to his dismay. "I'm sorry... I... overreacted. Do you want to be friends again?"

Snape smiled the first true smile since his great mistake; and his eyes widened. "Really!" He squeaked, cringing at how desperate he sounded. "I'm so sorry, Lily. I didn't mean to say... what I did... it was the biggest mistake of my life." Severus surprised himself at his forthright honesty; he was usually a lot more reserved.

Lily grinned again, her green almond-shaped eyes sparkling happily. "I'm sure. I forgive you, Severus."

Severus gasped, and opened his black eyes. Where was he? Why were there tears in his eyes? He was fine now; everything was fantastic, actually... Lily had finally forgiven him. They were back to being best friends, and everything was great.

Then Severus realised that he was lying in a bed. And memories from the last few weeks flooded back to him. His elation dissolved into grief, and the sparkle faded from his eyes into the deep, seemingly emotionless pits that Harry Potter knew several years later.

Lily Potter was dead. Dead. Gone. She would never get the chance to forgive him. He'd never see her expressive eyes smile at him again, even when her mouth remained motionless. And it was his fault that the girl he had loved since he was eleven was gone. His fault.

She was buried beside her husband in Godric's Hollow.

Severus turned into his pillow to try to quieten the heart-retching sobs that were impossible to prevent. He didn't want to wake the Slytherin students sleeping below.

Slytherin. Why was he sorted into Slytherin? Maybe if he had been sorted into Gryffindor, none of this would have happened. She would still be alive. Why had he listened to that prophecy? Why.

Severus questioned himself deep into the night; going over in his brain everything that he could have done to prevent this outcome. Tears ran like streams through the newly-formed lines on his face.

What was he going to do? How could he live without her? In his darkest night, many possibilities ran through his mind. One of the options he considered most was joining Lily. Why not? He had nothing else to live for.

As the sky lightened, Severus wearily got out of bed and looked in the mirror. The sunken space below his dark eyes was even more prominent, and the whites of them were bloodshot. He took a deep breath, and cleared his mind. His eyes hardened, he concealed every hint of emotion from the rest of the world. Dumbledore's words ringing in his head, he slipped on his robes, and made his way down to the Great Hall. He would carry on. He would protect the boy; the only thing the love of his life left behind. He would protect Harry Potter, and no-one would know.

Snape always was a great occlumens.