The Last Night
A/N: This is a song fic, based on the song "The Last Night", by Skillet. I was listening to it in math class this morning and it occured to me how totally Asch Luke this song is, so I am officially dubbing this song Asch's requiem to Luke ^^
Spoiler warning: Umm if you don't know how Asch and Luke are connected, and haven't gotten up to something big happening in Akzeriuth, then it's a spoiler ^^
Belle: Disclaimer time!
Asch: Haven't you forgotten to do a disclaimer like... every single time?
B: Shh! This one makes up for it!
Luke: ...And weren't you supposed to be doing math, instead of thinking up fanfic ideas...?
B: Ahh, what a heckeva math class ^^... hey! Disclaimer, please?
Luke: (sigh) xxBellatrix doesn't own Tales of the Abyss, or this horribly emo Skillet song.
Asch: Damn good thing, too.
"What have you done?"
"I.. I'm sorry.."
"There's no way you can make up for this."
"I'm sorry, Luke... but not even I can side with you this time."
"No Guy, not you too!"
"You're covered in the blood of the innocent... I can't even stand to look at you."
"Tear! Please don't leave me!"
"Get out of my sight."
"STOOOP!" Luke bolted upright in bed, drenched in sweat, haunted by the voices in his nightmare. "A.. a dream?" the young noble flopped back down on his bed in relief. "Just a dream... thank Lorelei..."
But then suddenly, cold dread iced through his veins. No... no, not a dream. All the memories rushed back to him, knocking the breath from his lungs and bringing searing tears to his eyes. Several days must have passed, since... He closed his eyes and ran through the memories in his mind. His beloved instructor betraying him... causing the collapse of an entire city and the deaths of countless people... his friends turning on him... the empty feeling of knowing he could never undo what he had done...
"I can't stay here," Luke said outloud. For the first time that morning, the young noble took in his surroundings. A hotel..? Are we still in... No, no it doesn't matter where we are, because I won't be staying. I won't force my presence upon them, they... they don't want me.
But where can I go? Luke closed his eyes again. I just want to be somewhere people won't ostracize me... I... I can't stand to see their faces.
The idea sprang fully formed into his head. "Home. I'll go home."
Luke immediately bounded up from the hotel bed, gathered his pack and made for the door, before spotting the blue cheagle sleeping on his nightstand. After a moment of thought, he silently crept up to the cheagle and made to stroke it, but thought better of it. I don't want to wake him.
"Goodbye, Mieu," Luke whispered to the sleeping cheagle. "I'm sorry I was such a jerk to you... thanks for everything. I'm going home."
Luke moved through the hotel like a phantom, stealing out through the front door, sparing a last thought only for the cheagle who had stood by him, when everyone else had shut him out.
He never noticed that the little cheagle had opened his eyes.
***
Asch the Bloody marched through the Malkuth capital, pretending not to notice that people cleared the streets when he walked by, or that women screamed and shielded their children from him. Asch sighed.
Noticing a group of children pointing at him curiously before their petrified parents whisked them away, Asch stopped to take a better look at himself in a store window (again pretending not to notice that a "Closed" sign was mysteriously thrust into the window).
Catching sight of himself for the first time in days, the God-general laughed out loud. No wonder people are reacting more to me today than usual, I'm covered in blood! Asch scrutinized the flecks of dried blood sticking to his crimson hair. It must be from that pack of monsters I fought just outside the Malkuth border... Damn it, I need a bath. Guess I'll head for the inn...
Pausing to give himself one more thorough once-over in the window, he caught the reflections of a very familiar group of would-be-heroes walking behind him. He whirled around.
"Hey, where's the dreck?" Asch demanded, puzzled when he didn't see his replica with his usual group of losers.
"Who cares!" Anise stuck her tongue out at him.
"He left us." Tear provided shortly, when Asch's inquisitive glare landed on her.
"That doesn't sound like him," Asch crossed his arms. "He's too stupid to get by on his own, why would he leave you?"
Anise sighed noisily. "I repeat, who cares! Maybe he went to go drown himself in Akzeriuth's miasma or something, we'd be all the better off if he did!"
"Anise," Guy softly reprimanded her. Asch noticed that his former servant hadn't said a word up to then, and wasn't meeting his eyes. Asch took a few deliberate steps forward.
"What happened." It wasn't a question.
Guy steeled himself and met Asch's glare unflinchingly. "He was responsible for the fall of Akzeriuth. I expect that once we found out what he'd done, he left us in shame."
Asch's eyebrows rose in surprise. This was the last thing he expected to hear. Akzeriuth..? But Van told us about that, he manipulated the replica every step of the way, that wasn't his fault... But I guess his "friends" don't know that.
"Heh," Asch re-crossed his arms after having let them fall, and smirked at the group assembled before him. "I don't care much for that dreck, but not even me or the God-generals treat each other that way. We don't turn on each other like animals... You're all filth. You don't even know what happened and you shove all the blame on the only one who won't defend himself. I'd expect more from you, Necromancer."
Jade, and the rest of the group's eyes dropped.
"Now," Asch's gaze became deadly again. "Which one of you can tell me which way my replica went?"
"I know where my Master is!" squeaked the tiniest member of the group, his ears flapping excitedly with the prospect of being able to offer useful information, to help his Master no less!
"Good," Asch strode purposefully forward, grabbing Mieu by the ears and making off with him. "Then you're coming with me."
***
Luke stood in front of his manor, reveling in the sight of its familiarity. Surely, here where he is most comfortable, no one will judge him.
His brilliant hair flying behind him, the young noble crossed the grounds to his home. They accepted me when they found out I'm a replica. They won't judge me here.
"Master Luke!" a voice called out behind him.
"Pere!" Luke cried. He ran over to his favorite groundskeeper and offered a heartfelt hug. "I've missed you!"
"As have I, young master," Pere smiled up at Luke. "But what brings you home, and alone too...?"
"They uh... couldn't come," Luke's smile faltered, but if the groundskeeper noticed, he pretended not to. "But do you know if my parents are home..?"
"You seek the Duke and Lady?" Pere's gaze lowered. "I'm not sure if I would... advise that..."
"C'mon, Pere!" Luke slapped his old friend on the back and shifted him an easy grin. "They're my parents, they'll be glad to see I'm home, safe and sound!"
"Of course," Pere slapped a transparent smile to his face. "Right this way, Luke.."
Luke spotted his father walking down the master hall, and immediately called out. "Father!"
The Duke slowly turned, fixing his gaze on Luke. "And what do you mean by this?"
Luke stopped in his tracks, and his eyes widened. "What... what do you mean?"
"I couldn't have been plainer. Just what do you mean by coming to my mansion, replica?"
Luke fell to his knees. "I... I'm your son."
"No," the Duke strode forward, fire in his eyes. "Learning your true identity was a harsh blow, I won't pretend, but it didn't change how we felt about you. You were still Luke fon Fabre. But this incident has opened my eyes to the truth. My son would never have done what you did. My son was responsible, and he cared about people. He wouldn't have destroyed a city. He wouldn't have killed thousands of people. Luke fon Fabre is not a murderer. I don't know who you are."
Luke screamed, which brought the Lady of the house running to find out what the commotion was about.
"Dear...? Luke! What are you doing here?" the Lady stopped beside her husband.
"I'm your son... I'm your son..." Luke cried from his spot on the floor.
"I..." the Lady knelt down beside the perfect copy of her son, with tears in her eyes. "You've done something very bad, something people may never forgive you for. Someone can't go through something like you just did without changing... You are someone I care about very much. But.. you aren't our son."
Just like that, the valve that had come loose inside Luke, spilling all his emotions forth and crushing him with their weight, shut closed. He no longer felt anything, he was numb. He knew only one thing: I don't belong here.
The false son of the Kimlascan nobility rose and walked out the door, oblivious to Susanne's anguished cries behind him, and to the Duke's cold silence. He walked past Pere, as if in a trance, and only when he was well past the mansion did he allow himself to feel again.
Seeking only a reprieve from his torment, he ran headlong into the forest. A group of monsters spotted him from a distance, and Luke immediately charged at them. He swung his sword recklessly, taking every opportunity presented to him without bothering to guard his flanks.
They don't care about me. Clang. My family. Clang. My friends. After somehow clearing the immediate area of monsters, Luke saw something that would have made any grown man's blood run cold. A full-grown war dragon, undoubtedly outclassing him by yards, stomped out of the forest's shade and glared at Luke, daring him to move. They don't care if I live or die. Luke held his sword in front of him. Well guess what. And charged. Neither do I.
***
"Those fools," Asch grumbled to himself, running from the manor he'd once called home. "That entire Kimlascan noble family, the Necromancer, the servant, every last one of them. I can't even imagine the state that replica must be in right now... who knows what he'd do."
"Mieeeuu... Is Master going to be OK?" Mieu asked, hanging onto Asch's cape for dear life as the God-general ran at top speed into the forest just outside the castle grounds.
"He god damn well better be, after all the effort I just put into tracking the dreck down." Asch muttered, more for himself than for the annoying ball of blue fluff. But the cheagle had proved himself useful, so Asch kept him around. For now.
"Mieeeuuu." Mieu's ears drooped down in worry for his Master.
"Shut up! I think I hear him," Asch stooped down low, searching through the forest floor. "Dreck? Is that you?" Hearing a groan slightly east, Asch rushed to the sound.
He was prepared for the worst, but this was something else.
"Mieu," Asch whispered, unable to take his eyes off his replica, lying broken on the forest floor. "Go over there and stand guard, OK? Let me know if anything comes."
Sensing that Asch wanted to be alone with Luke, Mieu did as he was told.
"Asch..." Luke lifted his tattered arm to try to reach out to his original. Asch noted that there were so many cuts the dominant color of his arm was red. Asch sincerely hoped that the cuts were caused by the monsters, and not... something else. Luke lacked the strength to maintain the effort of keeping his arm up, and it hit the ground with a disturbing thud. He tried to repress the tears that sprang to his eyes from the pain. "Don't worry.. it's not as bad as it looks."
"You come to me with scars on your wrist
You tell me 'This will be the last night feeling like this
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine'
But I know it's a lie."
"Luke... lie still, and don't try anything," Asch closed his eyes, and spread his hands out over Luke, preparing to release all the seventh fonons he could spare to try to heal his replica.
"Heh, you called me Luke," Asch half-heartedly laughed, before coughing up blood. "Asch.."
"Can't you see I'm busy trying to heal you, you ungrateful dreck?" When no response came from his reflection on the ground, the God-general opened his eyes, seeing tears threatening to spill from Luke's eyes. "What's wrong?" he asked gently.
"They don't care about me. Moth- the Lady, or the Duke... they think that what I did makes me someone different, and now they only see a replica when they look at me... if they'd even look at me. And Guy... Ion... Tear," his voice broke. "I just had to leave. You didn't see... you weren't there... the things they said to me.."
Luke was crying so hard by then that it was impossible for Asch to understand him. "They didn't hear what I heard, from Van himself no less. I know what happened, Luke, it wasn't your fault. They did something terrible to you for something that you tried your hardest to prevent," Asch didn't know what he could do for his replica, but he wanted to, he wanted to so badly. "Come on, please... Just breathe."
"They all say everything is your fault
But they don't know you like I know you
They don't know you at all."
Asch waited, keeping up his healing all the while, and slowly Luke's breathing began to slow.
"I don't see how things will ever get better," Luke whispered in a broken voice. "The Lady said that I can never undo what I did... I can't make up for it. Tear said I'm covered with the blood of the innocent... I can't do anything for the people that I killed! Father's right, I'm a murderer! Things will always be like this... I don't know what to do..."
It was Luke's quiet whispering that got to Asch the most, that made it all the more real. He'd become so used to Luke's outbursts that this quiet whisper downright alarmed him. He grasped onto Luke's hand. "Don't say that. Things always get better. I understand how you don't believe me now, but I'm telling you the truth. Be strong, I'm here."
"The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand
I will help you hold on."
Luke didn't seem to hear him, his thoughts were somewhere else. Asch didn't like where his thoughts might take him, but didn't know how better to get his attention.
"I woke up alone this morning," Luke began softly. "Usually Guy sleeps in the bed next to me, when we stay in inns... but he couldn't stand to be around me so much that he'd rather share a room with Jade, or a girl. I..." Luke fell silent once he heard his own words. Guy would rather have slept near a girl. That really puts a perspective on things.
Asch tried to hide his shock at hearing exactly how much Luke's friends had abandoned him. "Stop it. Listen to me, you aren't listening," he paused to see if he had his replica's full attention. He didn't, so he tried a different tactic.
Asch rose, and moved closer to Luke, resting his hand on his replica's cheek, to softly tilt his head to face him, and emerald eyes locked onto emerald eyes. "Whether they are or aren't your friends isn't the important thing. What you need to know is that they aren't here right now, I am. I'm trying my damn best to drag you back from death and all you can go on about is your "friends"."
Looking into his reflection's eyes, Asch saw tears threatening to flow over again. Asch wrapped his arms around his replica. "I crossed the world to find you," he said softly. "and I'd do it again. If someone took you from me right now, I'd cross back to get you. If you're going to dwell on anything, dwell on that. I'm not going to let go of you. You're safe with me. Breathe."
"This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything you need me to be."
A smile graced the light redhead's face. "Thank you," suddenly he frowned. "Asch, don't wear yourself out with your healing... this isn't anything my body can't fix on its own."
Asch held his breath to keep himself from saying that had he arrived any later, Luke would surely have died. "Don't worry about it, this is me you're talking about. Endless reservoir of energy, remember?"
"But Asch," Luke's voice became more insistent. "There's a war dragon around here, a huge one. My life isn't worth yours. You have to get out of here before it realizes I'm still alive and comes back to finish me off."
When Asch looked like he was going to argue, Luke cut him off.
"Please," he whispered into his originals shoulder, still holding onto him. "You've done enough for me. If you keep this up, you'll be too weak to fight your way out of the forest. Let me go."
"Idiot," Asch whispered brokenly. "Don't you get it? I just almost lost you, I'm not letting go of you again for anything. If you're entertaining any thoughts of 'what do i have to live for', then let me cut you off right there. You can live for me. Try, Luke. I can't heal you on my own. Don't do this for your family, for your friends, for those who abandoned you. Do this for me, because I'm fighting for you."
"I won't let you say goodbye
And I'll be your reason why
This is the last night you'll spend away
Away from me."
Luke gripped Asch tighter, and let go of the barrier he'd put up when he fled his manor. He let his fonons flow free in a way that he hadn't since Akzeriuth, because he trusted Asch to guide him. I understand now. Luke smiled. He felt his past fall away from him, and the feeling of his original's embrace was becoming all the more real.
"Luke... If you need something to hold onto, hold onto me."