Scared
Written by: Adventure-Seeking-Juliet
When: Listening to the song, Scared, by Three Days Grace.
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars, Three Days Grace, or their song Scared. *Violin plays* dosen't it break your heart?
A/N Short, One-Shot. A week after the events on Bespin Luke let's out his inner turmult about Vader's revalation, while working on his new X-wing. Not a songfic, but based off of the song Scared by Three Days Grace...Please read and review:)
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Luke shivered. Every night it felt it, the creeping, disturbing feeling of the dark side...and the truth.
His dreams were no longer filled with happy images of things he wished for, they had become nightmares. Fear induced nightmares, at that. Jedi's weren't supposed to feel fear, and that was what scared Luke even more.
Luke could feel the change inside himself from Vader's revalation, from their confrontation; he was different. But he shouldn't be.
Lies, he thought bitterly, all lies. Everything he'd been told, and everything he had believed in. How could he even pretend to be the same care- free, naive boy he'd been before! Would he ever even be able to feel completely safe and unafraid again?
Luke began to re-wire the stabalizer in his X-wing without thinking, his inner turmult gripping his mind like Vader's hand gripped the throat of so many innocent victims.
I wish he'd never told me, Luke's mind spat in a surge of anger, I wish I'd never known! I could have gone on being...being...me.
Oh how Luke had taken for granted the bliss of his prior ignorance!
He woke up screaming now every night, with memories he would never forget, vivid memories of all the people he'd cared for who were dead thanks to the Empire, thanks to Vader.
It seemed like a life time ago that he'd left the farm to return to his aunt and uncle's burned remains, when Ben had been struck down by Vader, when Biggs had been blown to pieces...
Murdered all of them, by the Empire.
Luke pounded the tool in his hand on the side of the X-wing, wincing at the dent it made. It was just something else he would have to fix, like his...father, Han, the god damned galaxy, and his own...soul.
I'm so tired of waking up screaming, Luke's mind shouted, It's all beacause of you Vader, you!
Luke could hear the voices of everyone in his head, they were all depending on him...What if he let them down? What if he fell into Vader's trap? Luke put his head in his hand's...So real were these voices in his head!
He can feel the darkside now, can almost hear it move as though it were a slithering snake, couldn't it just leave him alone? He'd never felt like this before, so...dark, and alone.
"It's all beacuse of you," Luke whispered to no one.
He couldn't be scared, or lonely. He was a Jedi Kight, a commadar in the Rebel Fleet he couldn't be.
Then why was he?
It was all beacuse of Vader, if he'd never told Luke, if Luke had never known...but it didn't matter because he DID know.
No matter if Luke wished it hadn't happened; it had. He would wake up screaming now until he learned to deal with it.
To cope with the fear Vader had caused to erupt in Luke.
I will not be scared and lonely, Luke ordered to himself, I can't or everyone will suffer. I have to make the right decision or the darkness will consume me like it did, Anakin, my father. I will not allow it to.
He didn't.
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