All usual disclaimers apply, I don't own the rights, I don't get money and this is for entertainment only. This is a silly little short story. I hope you enjoy it.

The Writer By Starsky's Strut

"Hey! There's one of 'em now! Pull over, Starsk!" Hutch hollered.

The Torino screeched to a halt next to a woman with a backpack slung over one shoulder. Starsky and Hutch piled out of the car. They were pissed.

"You're one of THEM, ain't ya?" Starsky snapped as he and Hutch confronted the woman.

"One of who?" The woman goggled up at the angry detectives. A look of fear, confusion and oddly enough, excitement on her face.

"One of those WRITERS" Hutch snarled as he snatched her backpack off her shoulder and started rifling through it.

"Well, I just started, I only have a few chapters of a story written so far- "

"Well STOP it!" You don't have to go that route!" Starsky pleaded.

"I don't know if I can. It's kinda addicting" She smiled sheepishly up at them.

"That's why we want you to STOP. For God's sake! Stop now before it's too late!" Hutch said pleadingly. "I've been through something like this before! Trust me, it's not pleasant!"

"Yeah, we are sick to death of being hurt!"

"Or sick, shot, stabbed, kidnapped, tortured, killed off, whatever... We're friends, partners, we don't want to see each other that way! So why do you do it?! Huh? What kind of sicko are you?"

"Well, I haven't written anything like that, well, not yet anyway. Just working on a fun little thing about a skunk-"

"THAT WAS YOU?!" Starsky was incensed. "I couldn't get a date for a month after that"

"Oh, sorry! Gosh, I really didn't think..."

"Exactly! Gets ya inta trouble every time!" Starsky turned to Hutch "what's she got in that bag?"

"The usual stuff, pens, pencils, notebooks, purse and ..." Hutch rolled his eyes "A romance novel"

"A little harmless mind candy" The woman mumbled, red faced.

Starsky shook his head, rolling his eyes. "What's in that notebook? Anything interesting?"

"I'll say! Here's a section on some story ideas... Lady, this one is not at all original, boring, this one's too sappy, WHAT THE HELL?!!! That one is just plain SICK! Good God woman! You need therapy! A lot of therapy!"

"Hey! Lemme see!" Starsky grabbed the notebook from Hutch "Here's a little dictionary of terms... hmmm, let's see..." Starsky started to read. "'H/C -Hurt/Comfort Where one of the guys gets hurt, the other comforts him.'" He shook his head "What a bunch of nuts! And here I thought that we were just caring guys"

"Oh, you are! That's why we like to write about you!" The lady chirped.

Starsky ignored her continued "'Mary Sue- Where a writer inserts a female character that
falls in love with either H or S, she has super woman qualities (super smart,
beautiful, ESP, etc.) has Flashing eyes of some unusual color, has Flowing
Tresses, not normal hair. The "Mary Sue" is often a fantasy projection of
what the author's desire to adored by her fav. character.'" He looked at Hutch as he flipped the notebook closed. "So, that's were all your crazy girlfriends come from"

"Ha, Ha, Some of yours too, Starsk!"

"No offence lady, but you are no Mary Sue, sorry"

"Whew, I was worried for a minute there!" She wiped at her brow and grinned.

Starsky rolled his eyes and shoved her stuff back into the backpack and handed it to her.

"Wow! I am NEVER washing this!" She said, stroking the backpack.

Starsky and Hutch shook their heads 'what a lunatic' their eyes said.

Hutch then turned to the lady and shook his right index finger in her face "Stop writing this crap! NOW!"

Her eyes rounded "WOW! The Infamous Hutchinson Warning Finger! Awsome!" She raised her left index finger and moved as if to touch Hutch's finger.

He jerked his hand back and looked at her as though she were crazy. He then looked around and noticed a crowd forming. He glanced at Starsky.

They found themselves surrounded by women. A whole bunch of them, their ages ranged from twenty and up. All sizes, shapes and forms. All staring silently. At them.

"What the HELL is going on here?" Starsky asked in a nervous tone.

The women turned as one and silently pointed up at the Hotel that the Torino was stopped in front of. There was a large sign that read "WELCOME to the STARSKY AND HUTCH FANFIC Authors, Poets and Artists Convention!"

Starsky and Hutch gulped simultaneously. Their mouths suddenly dry.

"RUN STARSKY!" Hutch bellowed.

They bolted to the car and Starsky hit the gas, the Torino fishtailed away from the curb leaving nothing but a trail of skid marks and the smell of burned rubber in the air.

"I wonder..." Starsky rubbed his jaw.

"What?" Hutch maintained a death grip on the Torino's door handle, quite shaken by the recent events.

"I wonder..." Starsky rubbed his jaw again "who that lady's favorite character is?"

"Oh, I don't believe this! Who cares? She's a LOONY, just like the rest of those STEPFORD fan fiction writers back there! Now, shut up and drive!"

The END Please don't take any offence guys! It's all in fun!