GANBATTE, KAKASHI-SENSEI!
Part One: Team Pervert
They're a quiet bunch, even the Inuzuka. Kakashi suspects Kiba needs to smell a challenge before barking. Hopefully the Aburame could be goaded into it eventually. The Hyuuga girl looks everywhere but at another person, as though the gaze of another human would shoot through her brains like lasers. The ways she sits makes it seem like her hobby is collecting nervous habits, like some sort of hard drug addict or torture victim. She'll need the most work, he suspects. Looking her developing figure over, he decides he doesn't mind at all. Shino, on the other hand, seems to be trying his hardest at mimicking a brick. He has a lot of talent.
"Let's introduce ourselves, hmm?" the lazy jounin finally prompts with a smile that they can't see.
Well, theoretically, Hinata can, especially with her currently activated Byakugan. Even the Sharingan-based genjutsu on his mask doesn't hold up to those eyes. Troublesome, Kakashi realizes. She's probably already fallen in love with him. Oh, the curse of being a veritable Adonis pined after by the virgin Hyuuga princess! This is very similar to the plot of Icha Icha Stalker, he muses as his friend between his leg twitches, before getting back to his team.
"Your name, likes, dislikes, future goals … stuff like that. Beautiful ladies go first," he finishes, winking at the poor girl doomed to carry an unrequited lust for him.
"If it's n-not too much tr-trouble, c-could you go first sensei, t-to show me how it's done?" the girl squeaked, sweat pouring down her face. Kakashi can think of other activities that could get her sweaty … like training.
"My name is Hatake Kakashi. I like ... *giggles* … Dislikes are classified. As for dreams, maa …" he scratches his head airily.
Hinata bows her head stiffly, as though to let him know she thought his introduction had been a lot of help. Her crush sure is cute, he thinks. Maybe when she's a chuunin … Kakashi giggles again.
"Eto … I … I'm Hyuuga Hinata. I like … s-someone who never gives up. I don't like …" her voice goes quiet, and for the first time, she looks right at Kakashi, pouty little lips in what is unmistakably a disgusted sneer, "older men. My dream is to make my father proud of me … and for that person to, ano … put it in … so big … even in that hole … kyaaah~!" she clutches her red cheeks and shakes her head violently.
Kakashi sweatdrops as his ego falls to tatters at his feet. "Um. Yeah. Uh, dog boy, you're up, I guess."
"ALRIGHT!" Kiba speaks up with much enthusiasm. "I'm Inuzuka Kiba! Remember it, 'cause it's the name of Konoha's number one baller. I like Akamaru, kicking ass and hooking up with fine bitches. I don't like baths or vegetables. My goal for the future is to have a harem who likes fighting as much as they like fu-!"
"Impressive," Kakashi interrupts with a touch of panic, as Hinata looks to be on the brink of passing out … into the puddle of blood leaking from her nose. "How about you, bug boy?"
Shino doesn't move as he responds. Kakashi wonders if he even has a mouth behind that collar. "Name: Aburame Shino. Likes: entomology. Dislikes: insecticide. Goal: a swarm of children."
"A swarm, huh?" Kakashi responds weakly. He's always know clan kids had the importance of carrying on the bloodline drilled into their heads, but still…
"Affirmative," Shino nods. "Several dozen would be ideal."
"Pshhh," Kiba scoffs. "I'll have a litter with several dozen different women."
"I'll d-do him several dozen times e-every s-single n-night," Hinata pipes up in a bizarre show of spine.
Kakashi suspects several dozen headaches are just the beginning. He's right.
A/N: Kakashi gets to be sensei to Team 10 next chapter!