Warning: This South Park Fan fiction story has very foul language, the mockery of that the show is widely known for over the years. That I don't own or created South Park by Trey Parker, Matt Stone and Comedy Central because I write my own stories between season breaks .It is intended for mature reading if you find it too vulgar to read that you have the choice to do not read it at all or do not a give a crap at all which I hope that you will be enjoy it and laugh your ass off.
Die Elf, Die
One morning a few days before Christmas, at Stan's house which it was finely decorated for the holidays that the boys were sitting in the living room that they all were staring at a little creepy looking stuffed figure that was sitting on the TV stand that is the big fad for the holiday season this year that Stan hates this elf figure with a passion.
"Dude, I really hate this thing that my parents had brought it from the mall on Black Friday because it creeps me the fuck out." Stan said .
"Ha-ha, Stan, you're such a fag that you're scared over a dumb doll?!" Cartman had quickly replied while he was busy munching on his mom's freshly made Christmas cut out cookies which Kyle just rolls his eyes at him.
"Oh, fuck off, Cartman?!" Stan quickly snarls back at him that it is only egging Cartman on with his annoyance.
"Hey, you guys should knows that people are making funny yet sickening photos of this thing on the internet." Kenny mumbles loudly that is when the boys had gotten a crazy idea.
"Holy shit, you guys that I've a idea, Stan, grabs your little creepy friend that the plan involves that thing any way." Cartman said that is when Stan had gone up to the TV stand to grabs his immobile arch enemy off from the self and they've walked out of the door when Randy was pulling into the driveway after returning from work that Stan had struck the doll into his jacket when he was walking out.
"S-Stan, where are you going which we're going to see Grandma Marsh today." Randy said as he had stepped out of his SUV as his son and his friends walks by him to heads into town at that moment.
"Sorry, dad that I've to be somewhere right now." Stan said as he had look back at his own old man while Cartman was busy with texting on his phone that they're telling everyone to gathered at the basketball court at the park in a few minutes for a little show.
Meanwhile at the same time, cut to South Park City Hall inside the mayor's office that she was finishing her paperwork up before the holiday closing of the city government for two days that Pete had been bugging her all afternoon which she is getting annoyed with him after he had gotten a text from Cartman.
"Oh, come on, Aunt Mary that I'm wanted to see that little creepy Elf on the shelf doll gets blow up with a firecracker….please….please… please." Pete said while he had flips his long bangs out of his eyes as he had puts his hand on her arms that she'd stopped her paperwork.
"Fine, you can go out, Peter to get to stopped you bugging me while I'm doing my important paperwork." McDaniels said while rolling her eyes at him.
"Cool, thanks, Aunt Mary that I'll be at home at dinner time." Pete said as he was running out of the office that he almost knocked Johnson off his feet when he was walking in there.
"Geez, Pete?" Johnson said while he was fixing his jacket up before seeing the mayor.
"Huh? Wait a minute did he say that those damned kids are going to blow a doll up." McDaniels said as she had got up from her chair and put her heavy black colored wool peat jacket on to find them before everyone get pissy about their childish acts and called her to complaint about it.
A few minutes later…. Cut at the Chef Jerome McElroy Memorial Park in the basketball court where a large group of kids had gathered around the boys who had tied the elf on the shelf to a m- 8o.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, let me and my friends proudly presents the death of the elf on the shelf." Cartman said as his friends continues to finish the set up of the doll 's fall.
"Finally….Someone have the balls to take that ugly thing out that I'm so happy now." Craig said.
"Just wondering why this thing is so popular." Clyde added.
"Because our parents thinks we loves them and thinks they're cute which in fact that they're super creepy looking." Dovahkiin said that is when Mayor McDaniels arrives with BarBrady along with Officer Barkley and Foley.
"Oh, shit that we are in deep trouble right now." Pete said which his eyes widen with shock and had flipped his bangs out of his eyes.
"Gawd damnit?!" Cartman said under his breath which his another plan is about to go to shit at that minute.
" Kids, what the hell you're doing now." McDaniels said which she looks pissed at them that they'd pointed at the doll which the mayor is overcome with disgust at that moment because she had remembered to a moment that her grown son who was being smart ass prankster who had decided to pulled a prank on her while she was in the shower one morning. "Oh, nevermind just blow the fucker up."
"So, mayor what had changed your mind all sudden." Cartman asks which the mayor just stood there rolling her eyes at him while he was busy munching on a bag of cheesy poofs. "Kenny, Light it."
That is when Kenny had light the rocket and dodged the hell out of there that is when the doll had been blown into pieces.
"Success….That the target had been destroyed." Stan said while they're high fiving each others at that moment.
The End.
Author's Notes: Merry Christmas , or Happy holidays to my readers that this story had came from my brain last night after looking at the funny Elf on the shelf picture and it is a popular trend with that doll….. This story isn't a part of my TSPC series which my Christmas present to you guys to thanks you for the views….Now back to finishing the finale to That Banned Word for a town and the third chapter to the Return of the Green Goo.