Author's Note: So...I haven't really had much inspiration for RC and hopefully that will change soon, but until then, please hold on for me my lovely readers. This is going to be a bunch of one shots, probably no longer than a thousand words and I hope you enjoy!
WARNING: Intolerance, homophobia, and just regular cussing.
"Did you know that Dwalin has a boyfriend? Of all fucking things! He's a poncy boy! Dwalin!" said Narir, too busy messing with his controller to really pay attention to the noncommittal hum Thorin game over his headset. They were focusing on playing the latest shooting game available on Xbox live and had been playing for the last two hours.
"Ori's a nice person. Have you met him?" Thorin said calmly.
Narir made a disgusted face, even if he knew that Thorin couldn't see it. "Hell no! Why would I want to meet that queer? It's already bad enough with Bofur and Nori sucking face half the time we all hang out, but now this? Couldn't Dwalin just stick it in some random girl instead of in some guy's ass? The dude's built like a fucking tank and he's dating a librarian? Talk about low standards. Or maybe he just pities the guy; he's probably just his boy toy or something."
"You don't think you're being a homophobe?"
"Why should I?"
"It's 2014, for one. Don't you think you should know better than to judge love?"
"That's not love! That's fucking gross!"
Silence filled Narir's headset and for a moment, he thought that Thorin had disconnected. "Yo, Oak, you still there? Hey! What's the matter with you! That was me not one of the enemies, you idiot!"
"Look, Narir, I knew you were a douchebag but I didn't know you were this much of one," Thorin said angrily.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"That 'boy toy' is someone that Dwalin loves. Besides, he's probably gotten more tail in the last six months than you have in the last two years. You should also stay away from me and my friends from now on."
"What, are you a queer lover?" Narir snarled into the headset, trying to take out Thorin's character in the game as revenge for the embarrassment of his words.
"I happen to be one," Thorin said simply as he disconnected the game, leaving Narir in a stunned silence.
"You didn't have to do that."
"I did. He was a fucking asshole," Thorin replied.
Wrapped in his arms, Bilbo hummed noncommittally as he snuggles further into his boyfriend's chest. "Does this mean you're going to be complaining about Bombur beating you in that game from now on?"
Thorin snorted as he kissed Bilbo's curls. "Please. I can beat Bombur any day."
"Yet to this day you haven't," Bilbo said, smiling brilliantly at the mock glare Thorin sent him. "You know, we can always play our own game if you're up to it."
Thorin smirked devilishly and said, "Oh, I'm always up to it."