Just a cute little one shot I came up with. Enjoy.
He was aware of the complaints about Umbridge. In fact, Minerva didn't seem to be able to talk about anything else anymore these days.
Forcing students to write with a quill that left marks on their hands was a very cruel and vicious way to punish them. Then again, most of the students irritated him and it didn't bother him to see Potter with scratch marks on his hands.
But first years?
During class today he had to deal with a Hufflepuff girl unable to do anything with her hands due to slightly infected wounds caused by Umbridge's damn quill. Potions did require a lot of hand work so it had annoyed him beyond belief to see the poor girl get clumsy with her ingredients. Of course her potion had turned out useless, but he had made no remark about it.
She was only a first year for crying out loud! Just turned ten last week according to Pomona. Snape wasn't a nice man and he didn't plan on changing that reputation any time soon. But to treat a ten year old girl like that was cruel even in his eyes.
He had told the girl to stay after the class was dismissed and had felt a pang of remorse when she had stared at him with big frightened eyes. His reputation served him well, but on these occasions, he wished it could have been different.
"Sit down" he had told her and watched as she sat down in a chair in front of his desk. "what is your name again?"
"Fawn..Professor"
"Fawn what?"
"Fawn Gilligan, professor"
"miss Gilligan, I want to talk to you about your terrible achievements in class today. If I can recall correctly from last week's class, your potion was.. what shall we call it?.. acceptable. Do you care to explain yourself?"
She looked perfectly terrified sitting in that big chair. Her messy blond hair forming a curtain alongside her face. He knew very well what that meant. He had been like that too, and to be honest, he still was.
"I'm very sorry, professor. It won't happen again" she peeped.
"answer my question, miss Gilligan. I wouldn't say you have a talent for potions, but it has never been this bad. So I want to know what changed"
He was so fucking bad at making kids tell him their problems. And he really didn't blame them for not picking him to confide in. Not even his own Slytherin students opened up.
He didn't exactly envy Minerva for having to deal with girls trying to get out of flying lessons because of their monthly problems, but still, in moments like these.. he wish he had her skills.
Meanwhile, the situation in his office was getting painfully ridiculous. The girl had no idea how to answer his question and he, himself, didn't know how to get her to tell him about Umbridge's vicious punishments. He could just throw his hands in the air and call for Sprout to deal with this. She was after all the head of the girl's house and probably knew a way to help the poor thing without frightening the living daylights out of her.
"Show me your hands, miss Gilligan" he said and placed his open palm on his desk for her too lay her hand in. But she only stared at it with wide eyes. He huffed in annoyance and impatience.
"I don't bite, miss Gilligan"
Embarrassed, she complied and showed him the back of her hands. Scorched into her soft young skin were the words "No talking in class" Well that was a rule he agreed with, but this was no way to enforce it upon ten year old girls.
"Did you go to the hospital wing with this?"
She shook her head.
"and why not?"
She started trembling. So hard she was trying not to cry in front of him. She mumbled something but he couldn't hear her.
"speak up, miss Gilligan"
"I don't know where it is, professor"
At that small confession he had to swallow thickly. So many first year students got lost in this stupid castle. He remembered very clearly how he had lost his way many times during his first and also second year. Usually, it involved finding a bathroom in time.
"Would you like for me to walk you there, miss Gilligan?"
She seemed to be thinking about his offer for a moment but then nodded and gave him the smallest of smiles. Did that just feel like a small victory to him? He got up from his chair and held the door open for her to go first.
Like a little puppy dog she hurried behind him, clearly having difficulty keeping up with his long strides. After a few moments he felt a tiny hand slip into his much larger one and she came to walk beside him. Protocol told him that he didn't have to allow this. But he couldn't make himself shrug her off.
She did not look up at him and she still looked scared, but he was happy to see her eyes were no longer red and watery from holding back tears.
Passing other students, he knew they were a sight to see. Not every day they got to see their cold potions master walk hand in hand with a first year student. Like a father with his child. He rolled his eyes in annoyance when Potter and his two friends came down the corridor, walking into their direction.
"what are you three looking at? Isn't there anything more useful to be done than staring at people? Mr. Weasley.. your mouth is hanging open" he sneered at them when they passed him by. He had to admit, their expressions of perplexity were priceless. That's right, dunderheads. I do have a heart.
Little miss Gilligan didn't seem to notice their audience. She walked steadily with her professor, holding on to his hand firmly. When they arrived at the hospital wing, madam Pomfrey was nowhere to be found. So he sat the girl down on one of the beds and conjured a basin of water and a cloth. This would have to do until the mediwitch returned from whatever she was doing. He sat down next to her and wrapped the cool cloth around her small hands.
He heard a small sob coming from her when the water started to sting her cuts, but she was fighting back tears nonetheless. She reminded him of himself in so many ways. Never asking for help and never letting anyone see him cry. He couldn't remember ever crying in front of anyone when he was a child. He remembered crying.. lots of it. But no one was ever there to witness it. It was very hard to not burst out in tears when you were so young and filled with pain and humiliation.
"There is nothing wrong with crying, miss Gilligan"
She looked up at him with her big blue eyes, her lip trembling and her breathing fast. Oh how he recognized all these symptoms of held back tears. He also knew the consequences of never letting anyone near you or help you. It ate at your soul and made you feel hollow inside. That was a feeling he didn't wish upon her.
"I won't tell a soul"
He wished someone would have said that to him when he had been so young. Just the promise of his tears not leaving the room and every bloody teacher treating him differently after hearing about it. No one liked feeling weak. His words seemed to work because a big tear ran down her cheek. A second victory at last. He would have to tell Minerva about this later. Wait, no. He just promised not to.
At last the girl was crying openly and he scanned the perimeters with his dark eyes for any unwanted spectators. The hospital wing was perfectly empty and the girl's privacy safe.
What happened next though, he hadn't foreseen. Cause now the girl was wrapping her arms around his own and sobbed in his sleeve. He could feel the black fabric getting drenched with her silent crying. He pursed his lips in agitation and sat there rigid like a stone.
"what is going on in here?!"
He looked up to see madam Pomfrey standing in the doorway of the hospital wing, her hands in her sides. She looked perfectly enraged and stared at him like she was about to show him every corner of the room. With a few firm strides she was at their side and gazed down upon the crying girl, her face buried in the potion master's sleeve. Snape himself, however, looked as impassive as ever.
"Miss Gilligan is a little distraught, Poppy" Snape said with his silky voice.
"I can see that, Severus. My eyes are fine, thank you very much. What is the reason of this? What did you do to the poor thing?"
He gave her an offended look. Me?!
"If I was the cause of her distress she wouldn't be sitting here soaking my robes, now would she?! I had nothing to do with this! It's Dolores' work. Look at her hands"
He carefully unwrapped the girl from his arm and took her wrists gently into his hands to show the mediwitch her injuries.
"Not that bloody quill again! That woman.. I swear, Severus! I should not run into her in some abandoned hallway at night!" Madam Pomfrey called out while taking a closer look at the girl's painful cuts. "Well, dear. You're going to have to stay over for tonight. It's what I do with every victim of that blasted woman, no exceptions. I'll be right back!"
When she was in her office and out of hearing range he looked down at the girl. She looked tired from crying and he wondered if she even realized she was not going back to her own bed tonight.
"There are good things about staying in the hospital wing, Miss Gilligan" he started softly, making the girl look up to him with big questioning eyes.
"for example.. you have the privilege of ordering as much ice cream as you can possibly swallow. I strongly suggest abusing that privilege excessively"
A small smile formed around her mouth. Victory number three. He got up from the bed and turned to her. She looked so small. As small as he had been during his first stay in the hospital wing. And that was a scary thing to do when you were only ten. He had not wished to be alone at that moment, and he knew she didn't want to be left alone either. But he had no choice.
"Madam Pomfrey will return shortly, I assure you. I do expect a better result in my class next time, Miss Gilligan"
She nodded and sniffled, wiping her face with her sleeve. "Yes, professor, thank you"
"You're welcome, miss Gilligan"
He turned on his heels and left, not saying a word to madam Pomfrey who passed him on his way to the door. He smiled to himself. Miss Gilligan had confided in the right person. If there was one thing he was good at, it was keeping secrets.