Title: Lift Me Up
Series: And Then There Were Four
Author: Jamiexh
Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns Glee.
Rating: R
Summary: When the girls move in together in New York, they must learn to live with each other, or risk losing each other.
Preceded by: Open Your Heart/ I'm Still Here/ Everything I Do, I Do It For You/ Girls Just Wanna Have Fun/ Pictures Of You/ How Do I Live Without You/ Regaining Unconsciousness/ I Think I'm Paranoid/ Come Clean/ Everything/ I Hope You Dance/ Breakaway/ I'll Look After You/ Oxygen/ On My Own
"The struggle through the long years,
It's taught me to out run my fears.
And everything that's worth having,
Comes from trials worth withstanding."
-August 2012-
Their apartment was small, but it was comfortable. It was a one bedroom in Greenwich Village, for $1600 a month, which wasn't that bad because it included utilities. The girls shared a king sized bed and loved every minute of their new freedom. Well, mostly, anyway.
The first couple of weeks went fine. The girls got settled and started their classes. They all even found some part time employment, Quinn at the library at Pace, Brittany and Santana as a waitress and bartender, respectively, at a bar and grill by the apartment, and Rachel as a singing waitress at a diner in the theatre district. They had no problem until the middle of September.
In the middle of September Santana starts fights. First it's with Brittany at work, but then she brings it home. Between yelling at Rachel for hogging the bathroom, or scolding Quinn for eating her bacon, Santana is a bit of a nightmare sometimes. Finally after one after one argument too many, Quinn couldn't take it anymore.
"What the fuck is your problem, Santana," Quinn yells back at her.
"What's my problem, Q," Santana argues back. "What the fuck's your problem?"
"I'm not the one starting fights all the time, S."
"Well maybe I wouldn't start fights if you respect my boundaries, Q!"
"And what about Rachel and Brittany? What did they do to you," Quinn spits out. "You yell at Rachel for singing too loudly in the shower, or Brittany for not cleaning the cookware immediately after she uses it. You're picking on everyone and I'm sick of it."
"Well, maybe I'm sick of you." At this Brittany and Rachel, who were in the kitchen trying to avoid the fight in the living room, immediately come running.
"Maybe I'm sick of you, too."
"Fine, then me and you are done, Quinn," Santana spouts, and storms into the bedroom.
"Fine," Quinn answers back with tears in her eyes. She talks one look at Rachel and Brittany, who both have looks of shock on their face, and she knows she needs to get out of there for a little while. "I'm going for a walk," she tells them sadly. "I'll be back soon."
"Promise," Brittany questions softly.
Quinn kisses her gently, "I promise." She kisses Rachel the same way before she leaves.
Brittany holds onto Rachel as Quinn leaves. "Did they really just break up," she questions.
"I think they did, Brit-Brit," Rachel answers softly, tears flowing down her cheek.
"What does this mean for the rest of us?"
"I don't know."
"I still got you," Brittany asks, crying.
"Yeah, you'll always have me."
…
The next day things aren't any better. Santana and Quinn might sleep in the same bed as each other, but Rachel and Brittany are forced to lie between them. The two stubborn ex-girlfriends go about their days ignoring each other. They would be in the same room as each other and not acknowledge each other. They are cold and distant to each other. But the worst is when Santana made a show of having sex with the other two girls on the bed with Quinn not being able to participate or even really get jealous over it. The next day, Quinn did the same thing to piss off Santana.
The really unfair part of the whole situation was that the break-up affected Rachel and Brittany more than the other two girls. They had to deal with the strained relationship between Santana and Quinn, plus school, work, and life in general. It put so much unneeded stress on the two girls.
If the first week was bad, the second week was far worse. Santana and Quinn moved on from ignoring each to scoffing at each other. It hurt, because Rachel and Brittany could see that Quinn and Santana still loved each other. They think that the separation would be only temporary, but Quinn and Santana are both extremely stubborn, so they are at a standstill, just waiting for the other to give in.
At the end of the second week, just when Rachel and Brittany think that their lives can't get any more stressful, it does. A letter comes in the mail for Rachel from the Ohio Department of Corrections. The letter tells Rachel that Jacob has been released from prison on parole. Rachel cries and shows the letter to Brittany who just holds her all night. Santana and Quinn go to bed on opposite side of the girls like always, without seeing the letter, and thinking nothing of the affectionate behavior between Rachel and Brittany.
Rachel doesn't sleep well that night. She cries and wants nothing more than to tell Quinn and Santana that Jacob's out of prison, and to have them hold her. But, she doesn't want to start another fight. She doesn't want Quinn or Santana to move out, or worse, leave her and Brittany. She is convinced to suffer in silence until the other two make up.
A few days later Rachel still isn't sleeping well. She still keeps up with her day to day routine, but it's taking its toll. So, that Wednesday, while Rachel waits for Brittany to finish with class so they can take the subway home together, Rachel looks up and sees him.
Jacob looks directly at her, smiles, and waves. Rachel starts hyperventilating and shaking. Jacob just stares at her, looking concerned, and starts to approach her. This, of course, makes Rachel more hysterical. Rachel nearly jumps into the air when she is tapped on the shoulder.
"Hey," Brittany coos. "What's wrong?"
"He's here," Rachel squeaks out.
"Who's here?"
"Jacob," Rachel says as she points towards him.
"Honey," Brittany soothes. "That's not Jacob. That's my friend, Billy, from class. He must have recognized you. See, look again." Rachel does and sure enough, it is Billy. Rachel waves back to him, and Brittany pulls her in for a big hug and a passionate kiss. Their classmates at Juilliard knew that they were dating each other, but didn't know about Santana and Quinn. Which was good and bad in its own ways, but it meant that they didn't have to explain their relationship to everyone. "Come on. Let's go home."
Brittany doesn't lose contact with Rachel the whole way home. When they get there, Santana and Quinn are already home glaring at each other. But when both girls see Rachel a shaking mess, they drop it and try to run over to her. But that's when Brittany pulls Rachel into her, and doesn't let Santana and Quinn near her.
"You two, stay here," Brittany orders. She gently kisses Rachel, leading her into the bedroom and laying her down. "I'll be right back," She promises Rachel. Heading back into the living room, Brittany snaps at her other two girlfriends. "This has gone on long enough. You both love each other, and can't you see what your breakup is doing to us? It's tearing us all apart. And look, you both didn't even notice that something was bothering her for three days. Three days! That's how oblivious you've been. I bet neither one of you knew that she hasn't been sleeping well and she cries herself to sleep when she does. Bet you didn't know that the reason behind all this is that Jacob has been paroled." Brittany pauses at their shocked faces. "Yeah, Jacob's out of prison, and she's been so stressed because of everything and your strain on this relationship that she thought she saw him today. It wasn't him, but her mind's playing tricks on her. She needs us, all of us, right now. But, I won't let you near if you're going to act like you've been acting. I'm going back into the bedroom with her. You can join us when you make up." With that, Brittany turns on her the balls of her feet and leaves them.
Both Santana and Quinn say nothing for a long minute. Both had been crying because they realized the truth in Brittany's words. Finally, Santana sighs and mumbles, "I'm sorry."
"Me too. I miss you," Quinn agrees.
"I miss you too," Santana confirms, kissing her hard. "God, I miss doing that."
"Why'd you it in the first place," Quinn questions.
"I got scared. I mean I love you. I love Brittany and I love Rachel, but for a second I felt trapped. Like my future was going too fast and it scared me. I regret breaking up with you. I regret starting those fights, because this is precious. It's the most precious thing, I have and I don't want to lose it." Santana cries harder at the admission.
Quinn pulls her in for a hug, and then grabs her hand, and puts it to the center of Quinn's chest. Santana hand cups a hard oval object. Quinn's pulls out from underneath her clothes the engraved dog tag that Santana gave her for graduation, the words "Baby Mama" clearly shining in the light. "I never took it off," Quinn told her, "Even when we were broken up. I'd hold it and think of you. I love you." Quinn kisses her softly on the lips.
Santana smiles, "Be my girl, again?"
"Only if you'll be mine." Santana just nods through the tears. "Come on," Quinn finishes. "Let's go see our girls."
When they get into the bedroom they see Brittany holding Rachel and kissing her gently. Rachel is silently sobbing. But, both girls do manage to look up at both Santana and Quinn holding hands.
"You're back," Rachel says softly.
"We're back, Baby Girl," Santana confirms.
"Prove it," Brittany demands.
Santana pulls Quinn in for a kiss that so powerful both girls shutter by the mere force of it.
Brittany smiles, and Rachel reaches out for Santana, who immediately holds her. Quinn settles in behind Brittany. All four girls sigh in contentment. It was good to be back.
"Now, we just have to get someone else out of our bed," Quinn informs the group. And everyone knows what Quinn means because six hands immediately fly onto Rachel's body. Clothes are being stripped and Rachel feels hands everywhere. It's amazing. It's home.
"Where do need me, Baby Girl," Santana whispers in her ear.
"Inside," Rachel moans. And Santana obliges. Her strokes are slow and gentle, caring even. This isn't the make-up sex that they are all going to have to have eventually. This is healing.
Rachel doesn't notice that another hand leaves her body, until she hears Brittany gasp.
"Thank you," Quinn whispers to Brittany, as she gently moves in her. Like Santana, Quinn is gentle, and Brittany is riding her fingers to try to get what she needs.
After a few minutes, both Rachel and Brittany find release and Santana and Quinn cuddle them. For the first time in two and a half weeks, the girls fall asleep truly together. Santana may be holding Rachel and Quinn holding Brittany, but it's enough, because they're together again. Quinn and Santana smile at each other, since it's the first time that Brittany or Rachel really allowed either one of them to hold their girlfriends since they broke up. Brittany and Rachel were trying to make it fair to the other two girls by not taking sides, but it really strained the relationship. But, now they're back, and though they know it will take some time to get back to normal completely, they are willing to do what it takes, because their love is worth it.