HOW TO WRITE A TOUHOU TROLL FIC: THE TROLL FIC

This is intentionally unorigional. And it is troll-fic-ception.

One day, Reimu was in the Hakurei shrine when Marise flew in.

"Reimu!" said Marisa. "I need to know how to write a Touhou troll fic, ze!"

"I don't know but now I need to know too!" said Reimu. "Let's go ask Patchy."

So they all sauteed to the Scarlet Devil Mansion Library.

"What is it?" said Patchouli. "Also, get out of here, Marisa, you little piece of Kanako's horrible rice gruel."

"We need to know how to write a Touhou troll fic, ze!" said Marisa. "And so does Reimu ze."

"Oh, good. I thought you were going to steal my books. As it happens, I was researching the subject just now." Patchouli began narrating.

"The guidelines state that spelling is a priority. Put that at the bottom of your priority list, for starters. Nobody gives a but , amgrar msumt stay for temost part. any time karaketers move must say they sauteed and/or sacheyed, and cliches must be sued (used) every other second or els. Also Gilfred von Baggens is the most evil person ever so if you see him IFL, punch him in the faec, because he is puer evol. ont forget to remov all apostriffys and alos use the rong amownt of kwots. also marise must say ze at end of vry sentense." Patchouli closed her book and said, "Does that clear that up 4 u?" sad patchhy.

"years ze." said Mariswa. "now thatt we know, we must use reimuXmarisa cliche "

"no" said reimu,frying Marisa sad. 'this isnt working. we must ask the troo mmaster of airheaded fanfic riters, Yuyuko."

"Cann I stopp toking like this nau ze" said Marisa.

"Yeah, sure. I'm going to stop anyways. This fanfic speak is wearing me out." Reimu sighed. "But you'll still say 'ze', of course..."

"Correct, ze!" said Marisa.

So they all sauteed to Hagyogokurou.

Nobody knows how to spell that. Especially not fanfic writers.

"Hello, Marisa and Reimu! Did you bring me food?" asked Yuyuko.

"Yes, but you can only have it if you can tell us how to write a Touhou troll fic, ze!" said Marisa. "Patchy said there are all sorts of ways to do it, ze, but they're overcomplicated, ze!"

"Oh, it's easy! Just get drunk and start writing!" said Yuyuko. "That's how I write my fanfics!"

"Of course, ze!" said Marisa. "Good thing we have Suika, ze!"

So then they all got drunk and wrote fanfics.

THE END.