I've never added author's notes before, but here's my songfic! It's my first one, so go easy on me. But any advice would be greatly appreciated. ;D
This relationship is over,
though my stomach still hurts.
And now I'm gonna live alone,
Why is the pain much worse?
You're so much better without makeup,
Why would you hide your face?
Don't want to spend the night and wake up,
Realize I've made a big mistake.
Billy Abbott sat alone in his trailer. The night before he had drank so much, and woke up with another woman in his bed. She had left already, when he threw her out. Victoria, his wife, had come at the same time she was leaving.
He remembered the look on her face when she saw the unknown woman leave. Was it sadness? Anger? Regret? Hate? It was impossible to tell. They were going through a tough time. They had just lost their adopted daughter, Lucy. He didn't know whether they would still be together.
And yet whenever he looked into her eyes…he couldn't break free.
I cannot refuse your eyes,
Please don't look at me tonight.
My heart beats fast I know you're there,
And I pretend like I don't care.
It hurts so bad to know the truth,
But I am still in love with you.
Why had he moved out? This is the time Victoria would need him the most. Why didn't he realize…?
He felt so selfish. So regretful. Aah, so this is what it feels like when you make the wrong choice at the worst time possible. What kind of a stupid idiot am I? Billy wondered. Had he made the fatal mistake? The very mistake that would end his marriage?
I never meant to keep you waiting,
and now your food is getting cold,
I keep denying I'm in love with you,
My routine is getting old.
And now you stand in front of the table,
And say you never look back.
Do something stupid when you're angry,
You only wake up sad.
Ever since that day-that sad, sad day-he-and no doubt Victoria-had been waking up sad. Yes, he was angry. And sad. He had never felt so many emotions at one time. It made no sense. How could such a dangerous criminal get custody of such a small, innocent child? It was a mystery. A complete mystery to him.
What kind of a person gives a child to that kind of person?
He had asked himself that same question over and over…but it did nothing. It didn't bring Lucy back. It didn't change how he got Lucy. It didn't change what he had done in his anger. He had to go to her. He had to go to Victoria.
I cannot refuse your eyes,
Please don't look at me tonight.
My heart beats fast I know you're there,
And I pretend like I don't care.
It hurts so bad to know the truth,
But I am still in love with you.
It hurts too much to know the truth,
But I am still in love with you.
"I still love you," Billy pleaded to his wife. "Nothing can change that."
Those words sound so stupid, he thought. Doesn't everybody say that? Does she think I'm lying? Oh, please, please believe what I am saying…
"Billy, I-"
"You don't love me anymore," He said sadly. "And I can't blame you."
"I love you," Victoria defended. "It's not your fault Lucy isn't-" She stopped talking. The words that had- or would've come out of her mouth were stuck inside. And she knew why. So did Billy. The truth hurt.
No more kisses on your lips, tender touch oh please,
I'd rather die on my two feet than live down on my knees.
And you're the girl to get me over what we start to be
And I just can't get over you, until you're over me.
He wished he could feel the touch of her lips and the warmth of her body right now. That would be better than being so depressed all the time. What he would give for that feeling…the feeling that nothing would ever come between them. Although he can recall a few times when something tried to come between them…that something is named Victor.
"What were you thinking, marrying that idiot?"
"That baby is the last nail in your coffin that will bind you to that useless Billy Abbott forever!"
"You betrayed me!"
Am I really useless? Right now I feel like it. Oh, great, I bet Vikki thinks so too…she left a while ago…she must be all alone…
I cannot refuse your eyes,
Please don't look at me tonight.
My heart beats fast I know you're there,
And I pretend like I don't care.
I cannot refuse your eyes,
Please don't look at me tonight.
My heart beats fast I know you're there,
And I pretend like I don't care.
The next moment he found himself in the house with Victoria. He couldn't resist-her eyes were impossible to break free from. And they were going through so much pain-they needed this.
"I love you so much," Billy whispered just before their lips met. It was as if their lips were glued together. As if they could never come apart.
Still kissing her, they walked over to the couch and plopped down, oblivious to anything else going on. I knew we were inseparable, Billy thought.
It hurts too much to know the truth,
But I am still in love with you.
It hurts too much to know the truth,
But I am still in love with you.
Get it? It hurts so bad to know the truth that Lucy is gone, but they still love each other! Haha..just please Rate and Review. Advice is appreciated! :)