Hao! Nuriko desu!
Wow, it's been so long since I wrote a Digimon fic! Brings back memories. ^^ This was written for Mitsu...since she is a HUGE yamajyou fan and she wanted one written. But the fic...its small, its crappy...but I hope you all enjoy!
Please, no flames. There are just a waste of time, especially since I am giving warnings. And do not say its unrealistic or a bad plot. Watch me care. I wrote for the fun of it. BTW, what happens in it is true. You can cut yourself and get a high off of it. How would I know? One, I read about it and two...none of your business! XDD
Disclaimer and Warnings: I don't own Digimon. If I did I'd release plushies of the HUMAN CHARACTERS to America. The song is from A Walk To Remember by Switchfoot and it is heard on their new CD, Learning to Breathe! The song is written by Jonathan Foreman. ^^ And for the warning, this is yaoi, guy x guy. If you don't like, don't read. The attempt may look suicidal, but its not. And the point of this fic...cute and sweet. I'm trying for that, okay? =) Okay!
----------------------------------------
Dare You to Move
By Shamanic Nuriko
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
He bit his lip as he held back bitter tears. He couldn't cry. His father would call him a crybaby, then hit him as punishment. He had broken blood roses on his body. He couldn't complain though. No. Never for fear of more violet roses. So he learned to keep to himself, keeping those emotions that wiggled inside of him to stay inside. It hurt, it ached, it was like life was inside of him.
He couldn't take it though. It ached so much. He leaned over. Over the topple of medical books, to where his knees hurt, but he didn't notice. He let out shining tears from his rich, earth eyes. The moonlight from the window luminated the boy, making his skin seem pure, snow, porcelain
Heh...How long would that last?
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
He looked around. His hair was lit up so it was the color of the ocean. His emotions could be portrayed as an ocean as well. The ocean, soft waters, looking for something sharp. Something. Anything. He learned, from reading of course, that anything could be used to cut the skin. A knife, scissors, even a stable. He just needed something to cut him, make him feel better. It could kill him or it could satisfy him. He didn't care.
His earthly eyes lit up once he saw light catch on something. Black, sleek, sharp. What could be better than a mail opener? It was everything he needed. Just some relief. Just a quick slice and
The young man took the tool in his right hand. He placed it on his forearm and breathed in. It took a little coaching, but after a few seconds, he cut himself. The movement was quick. He could at first see the cut glow. Then, blood oozed underneath it. He felt better. This was what he needed...
Wasn't it?
No...he didn't need this. He had to stop. He already had so many cuts on his arms. They were fading away, but it wasn't right. He picked up the phone and dialed a number. He could hear his breathing. Heavy. Choppy. Goodness...he sounded awful. He wondered to himself how he couldn't hear it sooner.
Click. Someone picked up the phone on the other line. Good! A short mumble, but then he heard the words that would forever save him.
"Hello?"
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before
The one that dialed the number, the one that held the receiver, took a few deep breaths, shaky and heavy, but he managed to get something out. "Yamato?"
The blonde haired boy on the other side immediately woke as his voice was blanketed with concern, like new snow on a lawn. "Jyou? Is that you? What's wrong?!"
Jyou breathed in and out again. He had to get help. A friend should help, and the only one that could would be Yama. In and out. In and out. Heavy and shaky
"Please...come over."
"But why?"
"Just...please...come over quickly! I know I'll do it again soon!"
"Do what? Wait. I'll be over soon. Please Jyou..." Something was in Yamato's voice...tears maybe? "...don't do anything bad..." He hung up. A dial tone. He'll be here soon.
Jyou managed to do something he hadn't done in a long while. He smiled.
Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be
Yamato quickly arrived at Jyou's apartment. He had to hurry. His mind was a wreck of questions crashing one after another into each other. What was so bad that Jyou would do? Was it some sort of addiction? What was with his breath? Was he scared? Was he battling an illness? Did something make Jyou depressed? Stupid question. Of course! That's why he called...but why? It wasn't a nervous breakdown...was it?
The mind of Yamato Ishida was confusing. He kept thinking these thoughts as he ran to Jyou's. The cold hair mingled with the sweat sliding down Yamato's forehead. With this impact, Yamato was too eager to drive a car. He wouldn't be able to concentrate and he knew within a minute, he would crash.
The young rock idol kept running. He ran through the park with flowers scattered like stars in an endless sea of green. He ran around the corner of a house with trees that carried cherries and cherry blossoms in their branches; just a few trees, yet it was a red and pink tornado. He ran to the front of the apartment complex, the gates so worn out that it the bars could be mistaken for prison bars. He ran inside and ignored the elevator and just ran. He was beginning to lose his breathe and his feet ached and he could feel his moleman sweatshirt stick to his skin but he kept moving.
He made it to that certain floor. He made it to that certain door. The beach sand blonde knocked on the door and waited. It felt like an eternity to the young man, but in reality it was only a minute. Jyou made it to the door with a smile plastered on his face. Yamato had a scowl on his.
Yamato walked through the door. Inside, he saw books sprawling on the ground. The moonlight did not help his eyesight, but he could tell they were medical. The moonlight also illuminated a puddle on the wooden floor. His eyes widened and he felt sick to his stomach. He was hoping that it was maybe soda that was spilled. Yeh, soda. That Cherry Red Mountain Dew stuff...that's what it was. He wasn't going insane or dumb. His ocean blue eyes turned towards earth ones, in need of nourishment of the mind.
"Jyou...that's...t-that's soda, isn't it? Right?"
Jyou's smile disappeared. He could lie this second and agree with what Yamato said, just deluding himself and his friend. But what about the cut on his forearm? Could he lie about that too and say it was just a cut from washing the dishes? Delusion...should he indulge in it?
"No. "
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before
Yamato looked up from the puddle, his eyes still wide like frightened child. "What...what was that?"
"No," he spoke softly, like a young kitten mewing. "I...I...I did it myself." The older man let go of his wrist and blood spilled from his hands to the floor. A waterfall of red blood flowing from a vein.
"But why? Why do you wanna kill yourself?" The idol asked. His palms were becoming a sea, he could feel his stomach erupt, and his heart quake. He was a tsunami all at once. One thing kept pounding into his head. One word kept appearing over and over again. Why?
Jyou shook his head, his hair shifted between the winds. "No...It's not about killing myself. I...I..." He needed help, and he could turn to his friend. Friends are there for that. Even friends that make your heart beat faster than normal.
"What?"
"I just get a high if I do it. Life...has too much pressure. I'm told to be a doctor, though I really don't want to. I'm basically left out and people judge too much on looks. If I cut myself...I feel so much better. The cuts are usually small though. I can just bandage it the next day. None have ever been this large though." Jyou returned the smile on his face just thinking of the pleasure. Yamato could only look at him with a mixture of shock and disgust.
"You can't...you can't do that! Shit Jyou...do you know what would happen if you died?" Yamato cried out. He had tears becoming tattooed to his face. They were pure white in the light. Crystal tears.
"No one would care. I'm the one that's left out. I worry too much and I'm just a killjoy," Jyou said, lowering his head so his smile disappeared and tears burned the corners of his eyes. Not now. He couldn't cry. He had no reason to.
Yamato couldn't hold it inside anymore. He had to explode, erupt, quake. No emotion of his could be held in any longer. "We all would care, Jyou! We'd all cry while you'd lay there in some box slowly rotting away! I'd cry the most! And you wanna know why? It's because I fucking love you!"
Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here
Jyou looked up, some hope shining in them. "What?"
"I said I loved you..."
The pressure of life seemed to have been lifted from his shoulders. The blue-haired man felt lighter, like he could fly. He felt a greater happiness in his heart and body than he had when he cut himself. He could even feel tears flow from his eyes.
"Do you...do you really mean that?" Jyou asked. Was the faster heart beats and sweaty palms and uprising feeling in his chest because of his love for Yamato? He never thought of it because of school work, but now that this came out, he knew it to be true.
"Of course. I was too scared to tell you but...I couldn't let you cut yourself and have you someday die! I love you Jyou..." Yamato fell to his knees and began to cry. He looked like some bruised bird, some bruised angel in the moonlight. A guardian angel.
Jyou bent down and just looked at the younger man. Beautiful. That's all that could be used to describe him. Not only in looks, but his soul was beautiful. So close to his friends. Then again, his crest was friendship. Now, the beautiful soul was in pain. So what could he do?
Jyou kissed Yamato on the forehead and turned away. More tears poured from his eyes. "I...I love you too..." he said softly. Yamato looked up quickly then, shocked.
"You do?"
"Yes, and...I won't cut myself anymore...okay?" Jyou still couldn't look at Yamato, and he had more tears.
The Carrier of Friendship cupped Jyou's face so they were both eye to eye. Earth and Water. Ocean and Sand. They kissed feeling the wind knock of each of them. It was like a blossoming, an eruption, and soft. It was their first kiss.
Yamato pulled away after a minute and smiled. "So, now that we have that taken care of, let's get you to the hospital and after that," his eyes turned predatory, "we'll have some 'fun.'"
Jyou gulped and gave a small chuckle. His new love took the keys to his car and they both exited the door, leaving behind the blood and tears.
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before