It was weird, so utterly and completely weird. I'm completely aware that girls think I'm attractive, not to be vane or anything it's just a fact. I had no idea why I let the girls get away with saying they got me in bed or why I kept kissing them… why it always seemed like a chore. I never found a girl that I actually enjoyed kissing or looking at, I mean I could tell if a girl was "hot" but I never really wanted to pay that much attention. And that's exactly why I was scared. Is it sad to rather watch your mate suck on sugar quills than have sex with a girl? Is it sad to be picturing your friend who is a GUY while you kissed girls? Is it sad to lay awake trying to think about quidditch or hot chicks but only able to see that stupid gorgeous face? I had no idea, I couldn't think of anything at that very second. Remus smiled and walked over to my bed. I wanted to slap myself for the thoughts buzzing around my head but instead just smiled, "pad foot" moony said quietly "hmmm?" I answered not trusting my voice. He was standing in front of me with a pair of pj bottoms… only a pair of pj bottoms. He never use to do that, no way he was too self-conscious but he eventually got comfortable enough to do it knowing we didn't care about his scares "do you wanna go for a walk? I can't sleep" I sat up stretching "any particular destination?" I asked quietly getting off the bed and moving towards monny's trunk to get him a bloody shirt "not really, just away" I smiled and threw a grey long sleeved shirt which he caught without even looking away from me "good, I like away" he grinned widely as he pulled the shirt on making the slight toned muscles of his arms flex and my stupid heart fluttered. Remus dug in my truck and threw a jacket to me and we snuck out of the room with the map trying to be as quiet as possible.
After a while we had dodged anyone patrolling and made our way out side being careful not to be seen. The cold night air burned my lungs and throat like fire whiskey but instead of warming me made me refreshingly cold like breathing in after eating a mint, I could feel the soft breeze brushing passed my clothes softly rustling my hair while at the same time making the leaves on the trees shuffle quietly in the dead of night as we walked towards the lake. I looked a head and saw the lush green grass being eliminated by the twinkling stars and the bright light of the half moon, the thing that stood between moony and his happiness. I looked over to my right to see Remus staring at the moon as if it had threatened to kill him "I hate the stupid thing" he muttered mostly to himself, I put my arm around his shoulder and we sat down at the bank and stared up "sometimes I wish the moon would just disappear" he mumbled not ever moving his eyes from the semi-circle "maybe your just thinking of it wrong" I said softly looking up to "the moon is a bitch to you and sometimes I wish I could tear it down to make you happy moony but then I look up and do you know what I see?" "What?" he whispered "you" he didn't say anything but I could practically hear his brain ticking trying to figure out what it meant "the moon shines so brightly, it's so full of light and it's so beautiful. It's strong enough to control the entire ocean. It has creators and it's got a dark side but it's still so strong and bright that people watch it with fascination, study why it makes earth a better place" I felt my cheeks flush bit I didn't care. I looked over to see Remus still staring with the light of the moon shining over him "I don't see how that reminds you of me" he whispered and I knew that I shouldn't have continued but I did "it reminds me of you because you're so smart and you're almost always so happy and bright. You're full of love and laughter and light. You're so strong, if I had to go through what you do I wouldn't smile half as much as you do, you're not like everyone else, you study your heart out trying your hardest at everything, you smile so brightly that it's impossible not to smile back, your laughs contagious and you've gone through so much to make you mad or bitter but you treat everyone nicely. You have your scars like the moon does and just like the moon the scars don't make you ugly they make you more beautiful, they make you you" I took a deep breath and looked back at the moon " you have a dark side that not to many people have seen and you try to keep people focusing on your bright side, I have seen your dark side but im not scared because I have seen the brightness of your smile and the warmness in your eyes so many times that I know you won't hurt me. You're strong enough to effect the people around you in such a good way and you are beautiful enough to keep people watching you when they see your smile or hear your laugh. That's why you remind me of the moon Remy… that's why when I want to tear the thing into little pieces to see your smile I know I can't, I couldn't hurt such a beautiful thing to make myself or anyone else feel better" I felt Remus lean in propping his head on my shoulder as we stared at the bright light burning against the faint twinkles of the stars "if im the moon than what are you?" he whispered "I don't know, probably one of the many other stars dimly sparkling in the distance" I said softly but Remus shook his head "no defiantly not a star, you remind me more of the sun…" I smiled and rested my head against his "so im hot, annoying and I give people cancer?" I heard him puff out a short chuckle before he spoke again "the sun is just the right mix of annoying and beautiful to make people want to be near it, to be in its warmth but the sun even if it ages it will never stop being childish, making days hot so people are stripping to stay cool, it's also very dangerous. The sun can burn, it can flare up in excitement and even more so in anger making the people that are too close to often get in to some serious trouble. But even with the bad stuff that can happen because of the suns childishness and excitement people still smile as the see the life the sun brings with its troubles, the bright happiness and dangerous beauty in the sun is what makes it so special to everyone. That reminds me of you much more than a faintly glowing spec" I sighed smiling brightly as I pulled away to look at him, he looked back with a soft smile on his lips "are you saying were opposites?" I asked making him roll his eyes "didn't you say you pay attention in astronomy?" he asked smirking at me but I just shrugged "the sun and the moon aren't the same but they need each other to make things work. The sun and the moon work together to change day to night, warm to cold. Earth would be an artic wasteland without the sun and without the moon it would be dusty and dry, there wouldn't happiness or life if one of them wasn't there to help the other" I smiled and brushed the hair out of his face sub-consciously "so the moon needs the sun?" I asked quietly feeling the heat rise up my neck "the moon needs the sun more than the sun will ever know" I had no control over my body as I leaned in but when his lips touched mine I knew I would never regret going for the walk. All questions in my mind were answered with one simple kiss, not hot and heavy or passionate or even long. It was sweet and it tasted of chocolate and butter beer, his lips were soft on mine… that's when I realised that no it wasn't sad to want to watch Remus rather than be with some girl because he's Remus, no it wasn't sad to picture him because he's beautiful, smart, funny, Remus and was it sad to lay awake thinking about him? No it wasn't, he was beautiful and no matter how long the moon stayed bright and close I would always want more, crave more. When we pulled apart we smiled brightly at one another, I never thought it was possible to be so entirely filled with happiness until that moment "do you still want to make the moon disappear" I asked as I wrapped an arm around him, he sighed and leaned close in to me "I still don't like the way it controls me… but no. I couldn't hurt the sun by taking away its moon" we stayed there talking in soft whispers all night watching the moon slowly make its way down only to be replace by the bright warmth of the sun rise making the sky go pink purple and orange. He was my moon and I was his sun
I hope who ever reads this likes it, I really enjoyed writing this Jtell me what you think