Chapter 1: That Demon and That Reaper, Broken
On the eve of August 23,1889, the inconstant, pale moon shined in the midnight sky over a secluded oak forest, far from anyone who knew who was going there, and the warm orange and dull yellow leaves sprinkled abundantly over the treetops. Sticking out like a sore thumb in the peaceful forest, Sebastian Michaelis waited almost impatiently for Grell Sutcliff, the Grim Reaper who requested to meet him there that night.
Honestly, why would Grell send a message to meet here and take so long to get here? Sebastian thought, looking around at the trees and and tapping his foot as he waited for her arrival as the wind blew bits of his jaw-length raven hair. I do love her, and that's why it troubles me. Who knows what my master would do if he knew about us?
It was true. Sebastian loved Grell more than anything in his life, and he knew from the moment he encountered her as Jack the Ripper. In fact, it was her than taught him how to feel such human feelings. He saw it in the way she combed her dreary brown hair into a dazzling crimson, the way her teeth became so amazingly deadly when she smiled, and most of all, when she shed her dreary disguise and showed him something interesting, amazing, and so…beautiful. But it was more than just her beauty. It was her passion, and the way she put that passion, and her entire heart, into everything she did, and it was the way she brought her love with her everywhere she went. Soon, he fell in love with that love, that passion, and everything else about the red reaper.
That said, he knew that while he loved her, and loved loving her, his master felt opposite. He would have been disgusted at the thought of the two of them together as much as he was disgusted at the two of them themselves. The butler figured that the demon earl would have ordered him to stay away from Grell, or even hurt her, and that was not a risk he was willing to take. Sebastian only allowed himself to be close from the reaper because his master had not directly ordered him against it, after all.
Eventually, the red reaper walked through the trees and came into Sebastian's view, holding a bundle in her arms close to her, and she smiled with joy dancing in her eyes. Her long crimson hair flowed freely down her back, and her red glasses hung just below her eyes as they reflected the moonlight.
"Hello again, Grell." Sebastian greeted to the reaper. "I trust that this is important, given our understanding that we must keep our meetings to a minimum unless it is such?"
"But of course it's important, Bassy. Would I ask you to come to this forest so far away at an hour so late if it was just to say hello?" she asked rhetorically.
"Yes, and you have." Sebastian answered, recalling such an incident.
"I think not, given that reapers actually need sleep, unlike demons. I'm giving up valuable beauty sleep hours for you, darling." she pouted playfully.
"If you're already this beautiful with the amount of sleep you've already had, I don't see why any more hours are necessary." Sebastian flirted.
"Still, you worry far too much about our secret little meetings, you know." she put her bundle in one arm as she used the other to tap Sebastian's nose. He reached up to his face, where Grell's finger currently resided on the tip of his nose, and put his hand on hers, bringing it down and holding it.
"No, I do not. I worry about what my master may do upon finding out about our so-called "secret little meetings", as you call them." his voice softened, and he brushed a strand of Grell's hair behind her ear. "I thought that you were aware of what my master would do to you, or order me to do to you, if he was aware of this?"
"Yes, I'm well aware of how much the little brat would hate it." Grell answered, rolling her eyes. "I thought that his little vengeance mission was dealt with, so why do you still serve that kid?"
"Do you not remember what happened with that thieving spider and that little maid?" he asked.
"Oh right, he's a little demon now." Grell answered, remembering what had happened between Sebastian and Claude Faustus, Hannah Annafellows, and the triplet servants of the Trancy Manor over Ciel Phantomhive's soul, and how it was lost to Sebastian, but their contract would forever not be so.
"So you understand that we must keep our meetings to a minimum unless it's absolutely necessary for both of our sakes, yes?" Sebastian asked.
"Yes, I do understand that, Darling," Grell said, locking with the demon's blood red eyes with her own yellow-green ones, with a rising tone of excitement in her voice. "but is it for all three of our sakes?"
The demon's eyes widened as humongous, dark clouds blocked out the moon.
"What are you saying, Grell?" he asked. "What in the world do you mean by saying there are three of us here?"
He gasped, realizing on his own when he looked at the blanket bundle in her arms. A shark-toothed smile started to creep onto Grell's face as he did.
"Grell, do you mean to imply that that bundle in your arms is-"
"Yes, I do mean to imply that. It's why I called you out here." she said, more joy starting to sprout in her voice. "To answer your first question, I'm saying that the intimate night together that the bratty earl gave us because I protected him during that mission where all those little girls were turned into dolls, and what happened between us upon that night, is not quite over yet." she winked, smiling profusely, and Sebastian finally pieced everything together.
"I do believe that birthing a child is biologically impossible for your body, Grell." Sebastian sighed. "Is that not why you murdered all of those prostitutes with Madame Red during the "Jack the Ripper" incident?"
"I thought bearing a child was out of my ability as well, until just a few days ago, on the twentieth. Ronald and I were collecting souls in Blackcloud Alley, and suddenly I fainted right when a man was on death's doorstep." she made her signature sign before putting her arm back under the bundle to support whatever was in said bundle.
"The next thing I remembered was waking up in the hospital with stitches across my stomach. The doctors said that reaper biology was very different from any other species, especially when it came to reproduction. Of course, I obviously didn't know that when I killed all those whores with Madame Red. They also said that, apparently, my case and my operation were the least "abnormal" they had that week. Since they said that they had to cut the little one out of my body, I suppose that God only knows how "abnormal" the others were. They also said that since my abdomen wasn't expanding to make room for the baby, she could have crushed my insides. The baby would have killed the both of us." Grell explained, smiling down gently at the bundle in her arms, cooing quietly about her almost killing the two of them, which was not something to coo to a baby about. "Then, they handed me this little bundle of miracles. She was unexpected, but not unwanted."
"I still can't bring myself to believe that this is our daughter, Grell." Sebastian sighed, putting a hand to his forehead. "Those doctors could have been lying, or they could have made a mistake."
"See for yourself, Bassy." she said, coming closer and looking up at him, showing him the baby bundle and holding it outwards. "I highly doubt that there's been any sort of slip-up."
"Very well." he said, before gently taking it from her hands and looking down at the baby that was bundled in, of course, red blankets.
The pale infant was quite small and fragile, and couldn't possibly have been more than three days old. When she opened her tiny eyes, Sebastian could see that they were quite peculiar. Her left eye was the common reaper eye color of yellow on the outer iris, and green on the inner iris, so there was no proof in Sebastian's mind that this was truly his child. That is, until he looked at her right eye, and he found that it was crimson red, exactly like his own. Indeed, the baby was half demon, and half reaper, and he was certain that she was the only one of such a creature. Sebastian didn't need anymore convincing. He still didn't fully understand how this happened, but he believed Grell.
"She has your eyes, Darling. Well, one of them anyway." Grell joked.
The baby girl reached out to him with her small, stubby hand, and Sebastian took one of his arms out from under her and held out one of his thin, gloved fingers, with an expression of intrigue and fascination that the baby mirrored adorably. All of her stubby fingers barely were able to wrap around it, but she still smiled a baby's smile and laughed a baby's giggle at him. Sebastian couldn't keep himself from smiling and breaking his stoic expression as he looked at her. He felt a bond with this baby, with his daughter. He wanted her safe, to have a good life, despite what she was. He gently handed the baby back to Grell.
"Bassy, wh-"
"Grell, I'm sorry," he said, stroking her cheek. "but our agreement to stay separate unless it's an emergency will not be broken."
Grell's smiling face, filled with joy seconds before, fell into a heartbroken frown, as if her entire world had fallen apart as it started to rain on the both of them.
"B-Bassy, what do you mean?" she asked.
"I mean exactly as I said, Grell. I wish you the best of luck in raising this child, because it seems like you will need it." Sebastian said, matter-of-factly.
"B-but she's our daughter! That means that she's your daughter too! Isn't that important enough for you?"
Sebastian couldn't bring himself to answer, because he didn't know how to say what he needed to.
"Or does that empty contract with that little brat take first priority?" Grell asked, less distraught, with more of a disappointed tone in her voice.
Still, Sebastian could not find the words for his answer as he stared at the ground.
"I see." she said, hanging her head low.
"Do you understand?" he asked.
"Yes, I understand everything just fine, Sebastian." she sighed.
Before Sebastian could turn around completely to walk away, Grell gently turned him back around before her hand collided with his face as thunder exploded throughout the sky.
Sebastian staggered backwards, holding his bleeding lip, and looked up to see Grell's face liked with fury, her eyes venomous, her lips stretched into a vicious snarl.
"I understand that you can look your baby daughter in the eyes and still tell her that you won't be there for her, and you'll keep hiding behind that bratty earl just like you always have!" Grell yelled, baring her shark-like teeth.
"Grell, listen. I-"
"Why the bloody hell should I listen to you!?" she shouted. "When I found out that our daughter I didn't even know I made was born, one of my first thoughts was that you should be made aware! So as soon as I could, I jumped across every rooftop, and ran past every tree that kept me from doing that, only to be told that you of all people would barely even acknowledge her! Your own flesh and blood, Sebastian!"
"Grell, please listen." Sebastian said. "That's not what-"
"Then what is it then? What the hell is it, Sebastian? What kind of half-decent reason would you have for this? You looked her in the eye and you have the nerve to say that you'll just continue to stay away unless it's important! Is her existence as your daughter not as important as whatever your stupid, empty contact has to offer?" Grell asked, shouting.
"Please, Grell-"
"What if it's her birthday? Do I need to write a letter to you a week in advance saying, "It's our daughter's birthday. Is that important enough to see you?" or "I know that you're still wasting your time with that empty contract with that brat, but our daughter has a father's day celebration, and you're her goddamn father, so does that fit the parameters of what's enough for you? Well, you'll never be there for her first words, or her first steps, or her first anything, because, apparently, none of that will be important enough!"
The baby girl started to cry in response to both Grell's outburst and the raging thunder, and the crimson killer stopped in the middle of her sentence and calmed her rage, becoming- or pretending to be - gentle and warm as she cooed to the baby, calming her cries. Sebastian just stood there and watched how she comforted their - no - her daughter, and realized that was all she was supposed to be. When the baby was calmed down, Grell paused and looked back up at Sebastian.
"Goodbye, Sebastian. Don't try to contact me, even if it's "important". You've refused to be there for the most important thing of all. It's not good for babies to be out in the rain like this. The little girl could catch a cold, not that you'd care." she said calmly, before turning her back and walking away. Then, she started running as fast as she could, until the red reaper was nothing more than a speck in Sebastian's sight.
And then she was gone.
"Grell…" Sebastian whispered, a black tear rolling down his face as he pointlessly reached out to her. This wasn't like a clear tear that was stained with mascara, like Grell's. No, his tears, like all tears shed by demons, were as black as the blackest ink. It was ironic, as he tried so hard to keep his emotions from showing so much, that his welling tears would immediately indicate how emotional he was.
He fell to his knees as more tears rolled down his face. Violent sobs racked his body as he put his cramping face in his hands. He was doing something that he had never done in his long demon life; he had cried over love. If it weren't him doing so, he would have laughed at how foolish he were to let himself be so emotional over some foolish thing like love, or even being able to feel such a thing.
But it was him.
He was the foolish demon who made the regretful mistake of falling in love with a reaper, then getting trapped in an endless, soulless contract, and and not even giving a proper reason for not being able to support the reaper and the hybrid child they conceived. Now, his daughter would be paying for his mistakes by growing up part demon in a reaper society, who views such creatures as vermin that should be wiped off the face of their world, and she'll have to hide her identity to survive. She would grow up to view herself like any reaper would view her;she'd think of herself as a monster.
Would she be wrong to think so? Sebastian thought. If I were there, she'd constantly be trying to choose which species to live as, when she would still be hated by the other, either way. I couldn't make her choose, so I decided for her.
Sebastian lifted his head and looked up at the sky, filled with crying, thundering clouds, blinking away the raindrops from his puffy eyes as they hit his freezing skin when he finally pieced together what he wanted to say.
Grell ran from the forest and out into the open before sprinting as fast as she could through the the streets, out of fear that the demon was following her. She thought about the reaper realm and her and the child in her arms were there in a flash.
She recognised the street she was taken to, and knew how to get home from there. The baby's eyes were wide with wonder and astonishment and she could tell the other reapers in the area were giving her stares, and Grell didn't want them to so much as catch a glance of her baby's demon eye, knowing what they may do, so she ran as fast as she could, as tears did the same on her face. The splashing in the puddles became more frequent by the minute, both from the drops and her heels, and her tears were indistinguishable with the pouring rain.
Once she got inside her house and closed the door, and was sure that the demon had not followed her, Grell dropped to her knees and looked at her daughter.
Her daughter.
Grell had longed for a day where she could be able to say that for centuries, but it struck in a bittersweet way in her heart to say it like that in that moment. She could finally and truly say that a child was actually her child, but she didn't want it like this; not when she had conceived it with the demon she loved. She wanted the baby to be their daughter. She wanted her to be a child of both of them, and she wanted her to be able to call both of them her parents, but she looked around, and looked down at her daughter, and knew that was not going to be so.
Grell wanted to wait to name the baby until she had gotten Sebastian's input. However, given what had just happened, she didn't feel as if she needed to wait much longer.
Grell didn't remember where, but she remembered hearing a certain name before. A name that meant "bitter" in some cultures, which made her shudder at how inaccurate that was, but in others, it meant "Goddess of Death". As for a middle name, Grell thought of a woman that, although she ultimately killed her, Grell had connected with said woman more than anyone, especially about not being able to have children, no matter how much she wanted them. Of course, now that she had achieved that wish, she wanted to honor her love that did not; Angelina Dalles, Madame Red.
Mara Angelina Sutcliff.
How fitting for a girl that's going to grow up to be one of the most deadly efficient reapers this generation has ever known. Grell thought, smiling down at her daughter.
I'm the one who's raising her, after all.
"Don't worry, Mara." she said. "You'll never feel the pain that I felt tonight. As your mother, I promise you that."
She smiled and held her finger out and Mara grabbed the first knuckle, laughing her bubbly baby laugh.
She's so pure, and her eyes, even if one is the eye of that demon, are so innocent, seeing little of what she will have to face. Grell thought, looking down at her daughter.
I have to protect her.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine," she began to sing.
"You make me happy, when skies are grey,"
"You'll never know, Dear, how much I love you…"
Grell's voice stalled when she reached the last lyric. She couldn't think about something like that. She held held her close to her heart, and even after the baby fell asleep, it was still a while before she changed that position to put her in her crib. She kissed the little baby Mara on the forehead before gently setting her down.
She couldn't finish the song; she couldn't bear to think about that.
Not yet.
I have mentioned before that I planned a rewrite of my previous fanfiction, The Red and Green Reaper. I have worked on this for quite a long time now, and I hope you all enjoy this.