Slowly and reluctantly, I uncover my face. I blink, close my eyes, and blink again. Streaks of sunlight penetrate the window and blind me. I sit up, drag my feet off the bed, and rub my knuckles onto my eyes. I stretch my arms above my head and yawn. I watch my legs dangle above the off-white polyester carpet.
"Kurt?" My voice echoed throughout the dark, quiet hallway.
And again, like every other morning I was met by a deafening silence.
I drew out a long sigh and slumped myself down into the nearest couch.
He was working late... Again!
The sky glows like a summer peach and the sun is pure gold in the sky. The colours of the foliage return to green and the air warms to an ambient twenty or so. It is the perfect dawn, one to be savoured instead of squandered. Under this radiant beauty I can see the path, uncluttered, ready for another day of travelling to the great city.
It seemed like hours of me just sitting in the couch, focusing all of my attention to the door. Patiently waiting to hear the jiggling of his keys.
Eventually, I grew tired of waiting and went into the kitchen to fix myself some coffee so I wouldn't be even more miserable than I already was.
I fished out the coffee mug Kurt had gotten me for no reason at all. I smiled softly at the memory of it. He had got off of work unusually early, wrapped it clumsily and came home smiling broadly.
It was always the simple things Kurt did for me that made me hopelessly in love with him.
Alas, he was taken and seemed extremely happy with his girlfriend, Allie. She was beautiful and definitely Kurt's kind of woman.
She silently cursed herself for letting her thoughts run there.
She did like Allie, she was a lovely person; so very kind to her but.. Well she loved Kurt — but so do you, her thoughts added mocking.
Jane sat there with her hands clasped around it, as if she liked the idea of drinking it but lacked the will power to lift it to her lips.
Kurt had always opened his home up to her whenever needed. She had her own personal keys for when life was shit to her and she needed a friend; an escape.
He'd always stick up for her in front of others, even when he knew she was wrong. Then privately he'd let her know what he really thought and how she should have behaved differently, who she should apologize to, how to avoid repeating the mistake. She listened to him because he listened to her. Sometimes he could lose his temper and be a real dick, then it would be her turn with the sage advice. They were friends no matter what.
But lately, Jane had noticed that friendship wasn't all that she craved.
She finally took a sip of her coffee still clasp tightly. She spat it out as fast as she downed it down.
"Ugh. This is disgusting" she muttered quietly before getting up to throw the coffee down the sink, quickly washing up her cup before attending to her phone.
There were a few missed calls and text messages from Jordan. Her boyfriend, they had been together for eight years. She loved him, of course she did but his constant distance led her to depending more on Kurt.
He didn't seem to mind at all.
We are friends, he'd say with the biggest smile on his face. She loved being the cause of his smiles. God, it was a beautiful feeling.
She quickly dialed Jordan's number. He answered on the first ring.
"Hey babe" he answers, the sky grumbled relentlessly in the background.
Where is he? She questioned quietly. It wasn't raining where she was.
"Hey J. Where are you? Sounds hectic" She speaks back into the phone, tucking her legs under her.
"Miami. There's a shit storm. I miss you."
"I love you" She blurted out.
I meant that, of course I meant that. But he'd been gone for a long time. It was the longest we've ever spent apart.
What about Kurt? Her mind argued.
"I love you too. Listen, I gotta go right now but I'll be back really soon, okay?"
"Sure see you." She murmured before hanging up the phone and sinking herself deeper into the couch, hugging her torso.
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When my hair lies like a second skin over my cheeks and I look as if I were just caught in a sudden storm, I let myself step off the exercise machine. My legs are empty and there is a rising feeling of nausea from my stomach. It never ceases to amaze me that the muscles that were working so hard only seconds ago now struggle to hold my weight. I stagger to the mirror to gawk at my sweaty form, my achievement, a visual that calms my fear of being fat again. I see muscles and bones that not so long ago were buried. This is the new me, the one who works to keep it off instead of consoling myself at the coffee shop with another commiseration prize.
I stagger towards the locker to where my possessions were. My hands dug around angrily until I found my phone
6 unread messages
3 missed calls
'Hey. I'm staying over so don't be alarmed when you find your fridge empty and your bed messed up'
A huge smile tugged at his lips. Jane.
Well her name was Alexandra but the nickname Jane got stuck on her after she occasionally dressed like a 'Plain Jane'
Him and their closest friends were the only ones to call her Jane.
He'd laugh at her associates' reaction when he called her Jane. Their faces were smacked with confusion and it was always the funniest thing.
He quickly typed back a reply to her before packing up his stuff so he could finally leave.
'If I get home and you're hogging the bed, I will lie on top of you. I'm not kidding'
He got a response almost immediately and smirked at her urgency before opening the message to reveal what she had sent
'No need. I'm leaving'
No emoji, no teasing, nothing. Her response ached as much as his body did.
She'd usually say something stupid and they'd laugh about it when he got home. Something was wrong.
He wobbly made his way over to his car and began his long ride back to his house. He contemplated on stopping by at Jane's house but it was 5:30AM so he thought against it and just went straight home.
Every night was a futile tussle of conflicting thoughts. I don't want to sleep, not yet. I just spent fourteen hours working and I'm not ready to wake in the morning to rinse and repeat. My second voice chastises me, the longer I lie in that bed the more chance of sleep I have and the better tomorrow will be. But I know that between now and the return of daylight are my zombie hours — when I am mostly awake but dozing in spurts. Six hours will feel like sixty yet I'll rise as if it was less than ten minutes of down time, just as exhausted as I am now.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Jane stumbled into her apartment, violently kicking her shoes off.
She silently cursed as her right shoe decided to be unnecessarily stubborn and refused to get off.
"Oh c'mon!" She groaned, tugging at her shoe.
"I guess some things never change" A voice spoke from the darkness.
She would've noticed her boyfriend sitting at the island if only she'd look up atleast one.
"Jordan?" Her voice cracked shamelessly as she finally realized how much she missed him in the 3 weeks he was away from her.
"Hey baby" He whispered back, nervously scratching behind his ears. He didn't know what her reaction would he so he prepared for the worst thinking she was still mad at him for staying away for so long but she surprised him by hopping over to where he stood and closed the distance between them.
In his embrace the world stopped still on its axis. There was no time, no wind, no rain. Jane's mind was at peace. How could it be that over the past few weeks, she hadn't seen Jordan's love for what it was before? Pure. Unselfish. Undemanding. Free. She felt her body press in, soft and warm. This was the love she'd waited for, prayed for. She inwardly thanked God and hugged all the tighter. A love like this was to be cherished for life. Jordan deserved someone to love him back.
But what about Kurt? Her mind argued yet again.
"Let me help you with this devil shoe" he said chuckling, kissing the top of her head.
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This is like my hundredth story...
But here's a new story!
I don't know how another story happened but it did.
Feel free to leave me some reviews, If enough people like what I've written so far I will continue.
Thank you so much to those who appreciated my older stories, it means alot.
If you haven't checked them out you should. If you want.
Thanks again.