"There you are Bella! I was starting to get worried!" Jacob Black, my supposed best friend, strolled up to me, all honky-dorry. It was December 20, and I had just finished buying Edward another ridiculous cashmere sweater. He had left me a list, full of curly calligraphy, and in the bottom, righthand corner was, in very, very small print, a request for a sweater. Well, my interpretation was, "Get me a two hundred dollar sweater so I can just rip if off anyway later and make out with you." Edward acts like I don't have high-powered vision like him. What a joke. "Jake, you know exactly where I've been. Shopping for Edwards' sexy clothes." I waited for his happy grin to dissipate, but instead, he just shook his head.
"Naughty, naughty. You know Bells, that's just what we all need this holiday season. A little sexy in a cold, dull world." He looked up at the sky just as tiny snowflakes started to fall. "You're disgusting. I hope this isn't the kind of weird behavior you're subjecting Renesmee to." Suddenly, a snowstorm whirled around them, as if created by the Keebler eleves. The last thing Bella heard Jake say was, "I want my fudge-striped cookies, I want them nowwwwwww!" And just like that, the wall of white was gone, and Bella was warm and toasty, in the arms of. . . Seth Clearwater?