- Yoshi gets a Job -
Gonzales512
It was another boring day in the large, metropolitan area of Smash City as the Smashers were moving back into the Smash Mansion that got possessed by Bank of Nintendo. It was a smoky day though, as air quality in the city plunged down to record levels as the over 1 million residents in the Smash City area stayed home to avoid the polluted air. The Mansion they came back to was everything normal, except one thing.
"Rrrrrrrring, rrrrrrrrrrring," screeched the phone.
"Burger King, how may I help you," answered Fox.
The mansion was normal, except to pay for everything, they had to get help from Burger King to pay for all the expenses. In returned, they built a drive-thru in the mansion.
"I'd like a triple whopper, everything but tomatoes," sounded a familiar voice. I don't want to get salmonella. And I want a chocolate shake with it, and large fries.
"Mario," yelled Fox across the room. "Can't you just walk to the counter like every other Smasher?
"I'm tired. Plus Cops is on and a guy is getting his ass kicked. I don't want to miss anything."
"Can't you get anything healthier? We've got chicken sandwiches now."
"Nah, not after what I've saw in that Spanish Foster Farms commercial where they were taking a picture of a fake Foster Farms chicken but didn't come out good so they Photoshoped it to make it more appealing to print on the packages. Now I feel betrayed by all the chicken companies out there."
"Maybe that means you should start buying Foster Farms chicken.
"The Smash Fund is out of money," announced Princess Peach, who came walking onto a podium, which appeared on cue.
"AGAIN?" complained Marth. "Doesn't your kingdom have money?"
"Yeah, but all of our coins are scattered in lines all over the place. That's why we purposely send Mario on pointless adventures."
"I KNEW IT!" yelled Mario. "Get me my Whopper NOW!"
Great, now I've got to find a new plumber, Peach thought.
"Anyways, let's see who hasn't had a job… Aha! Marth!"
"I worked at FoodMaxx before it exploded," reminded Marth.
"Oh yeah…"
Two months ago…
Marth was working at FoodMaxx distributing stuff from the trucks to the store. He was working with a propane-powered forklift (not the electric ones they got inside the store). As he was unloading food from the truck and backed out with a pallet full of food, Pikachu, who was also working at FoodMaxx, accidentally sends out a sparks and blows up the propane container attached to Marth's forklift. The explosion eventually blew up other propane powered forklifts, blowing anything in its path. The result of the propane explosion was a completely destroyed FoodMaxx, a severe food shortage, and hundreds of pounds of grilled tri-tip.
"Mmmm… tri-tip," Mario drooled. "I'll never forget that day."
"Ahem, stop getting off the subject. This is serious," Princess Peach said. "Hey, Yoshi, you haven't had a job yet."
"But I owned a million dollar corporation."
"That you ended up bringing down," laughed Link.
"Cuz you jacked all my money," Yoshi yelled.
"So, remember when you jacked my jack the other day…"
Three days ago…
Link was servicing his car after Ganondorf put motor oil instead of gas in the gas station to save on expensive gas.
"Stupid Ganondorf, going cheap on my car," grunted Link.
"It's not my fault that motor oil looked so appealing," said Ganondorf.
"It cost more than gas, and they sell them in quarts!" Link yelled as he was under his car, taking out an oil filter.
Just then, Yoshi came out of nowhere, with a rental.
"What happened with your truck?" asked Link.
"It all happened 3 days ago…"
Yoshi was on Interstate 80 returning home from Smash International Airport after visiting Yoshi's Island. It was a normal day, backed up traffic, and what I really hate most, when your lane's going the slowest and you see other cars flying by as they start to slow down. He made his way onto the already backed up Interstate 580, which lead him back to the Smash Mansion. On his way, he got off the freeway to stop at a McDonald's. As he pulled into the drive-thru, he saw Dr. Mario fighting with the cops.
"I swear, that's just regular prescription drugs," Dr. Mario pleaded but the cops arrested him for illegal drugs and cuffed him and threw him in a patrol car and it sped off.
As Yoshi paid for his Big Mac, he saw Link fighting with the cops.
"I swear, that's my jack," Link pleaded but got arrested for stealing a service jack and stealing a copy of Grand Theft Auto IV for the Xbox 360.
Yoshi shook his head as he was munching down on his Big Mac and pulled out of the drive thru when he was hit by a car.
CRASH!
"What the hell?" Yoshi yelled.
Then as if it was on cue, the cops came and took out whoever was in the car.
"I swear, that's my car," cried a Captain Falcon, kicking his legs as he was thrown in the patrol car.
"That's for the judge to say," said Luigi, who was working as a cop now. "A cop's work is never done."
"How's it going Yoshi?" Captain Falcon asked.
"…" was all Yoshi could think.
"YOU WREAKED MY CAR, HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET YOUR LICENSE IN THE FIRST PLACE! YOU IDIOT!" Yoshi was furious.
"I was just driving a stol… oops!"
"Gotcha!" said Luigi. "I knew this tape recorder come in handy someday!"
"Yeah… my car," Yoshi sighed.
"Oh, Captain Falcon… do you have auto insurance?"
"Well, I have this insurance with a bunch of dancing lizards like in the Super Bowl commercial."
"That's SOBE! And they don't do insurance… you don't have insurance," Luigi sighed.
"That's SOBE?" said Captain Falcon.
"Yup! And now you owe big time. See you in court," said Yoshi as he drove his damaged truck home.
"And that's why I got this rental," said Yoshi.
"Warning: Please change oil filter," said a voice in Yoshi's rental.
"But the only thing that sucks is it doesn't have OnStar. I'm gonna need that," said Yoshi as he lowered the jack, trapping Link under the car.
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! My beautiful face," yelled Link as dirty motor oil splashed all over his face. Meanwhile, Yoshi happily lifted up his car, swapped oil filters, lifted it down, and drove away with it.
"It was MY jack," yelled Yoshi.
"Wait, you called the cops on me? YOU BASTARD! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" Link started chasing around Yoshi before Peach threw a bomb, which exploded and sent them flying in the air, and ironically landed right before her.
"All right, now that I have your attention, the Smash Mansion is running out of money."
"We get it, we're poor, can we get to more exciting stuff?" yelled out Ness.
"What happened to your yo-yo? You used to play it all the time.
Three minutes ago…
Ness heard of an important meeting while playing with his yo-yo. While he was playing with it, Kirby ate it and became Yo-Yo Kirby.
"I win again," said Yo-Yo Kirby.
"Okay, this meeting's gone to hell. Will you guys SHUT THE HELL UP?"
Everyone stared at Peach. Then everyone became silent.
"Okay, Yoshi. You will get a job starting tomorrow at Pichu's Factory."
"Oh great…"
A/N: Yoshi just got his job. Hope his job goes well, well probably not. Read and Review! Let me know if someone's written a shorter flashback than me lol