"Rosemary, can you come here please?" I heard my mama ask gently from the living room. I patted my flour covered hands onto my apron and made my way into the living room. "Yes mama?" I asked softly. I didn't like how Mr. Cade was in the room drinking, what looked to be his third thing of beer. I despised the man. A good for nothing that only knew how to drink and gamble.
That was it. My mama patted the spot by her and had a rather sorrowful look on her face. "You know your papa and I have trouble making ends meet. And how papa's quite sick and all now." She began grabbing my hands to hold them.
"I'm aware mama but where are you going with this?" I asked her softly. "Rosemary, Mr. Cade here has agreed to marry you." "Mama!" I said yanking my hands from her. "I can't marry that man. He's a stingy old gambling drunk." I said glaring at him hard. He just smirked some finding my attitude towards him to be amusing. "Rosemary! You will Marry this man. You will go to the U. S with him and have a far better life than here." My mama said sternly to me.
"But mama please...I can't just leave you and papa not now. Especially since papa's sick and all. " I said softly standing up. "Mr. Cade has agreed to give of three hundred dollars for you." "So you're selling me then? Like I'm some livestock." I said sadly. "Try to understand love. He can give you what we never could. Please. Do try to make this work. For mama baby?" My mama asked gently making me sigh.
"Fine for you mama." I said softly. "Good. Now then let's get you too hitched." She announced happily standing up. I looked at Mr. Cade glaring hard. "Let's get one thing clear. I will never love you." I said tapping his chest hard. "Then the feelings mutual. I do hope your ready for tonight dearest. It will be our wedding night." He said lowly. The way he said our made me cringe and my stomach knot up.
"Alright then go clean up and you. If you'd please Mr. Cade, we will meet you at the courthouse in due time." My mama said gently. "Course. Ma'am." He said getting up from the couch and cleaning the mess he made. I was pleasantly surprised.
"So he does have manners. Maybe this won't be terrible." I said softly to my mother whom was smiling like a Cheshire Cat. "See he's not a bad man. Now then in the tub you go. Can't have you smelling like hog sweat on your special day." My mama said helping me out of my clothing and into the tub. She washed my hair and it reminded me of when I was little and she use to wash it all the time.
"How's papa taking the news." "Oh it was his idea love." My mama said gently helping me out of the tub and to dry off. "Mama! I can't wear those." "It's not for you dear." She said handing me a lacy set of bra and underwear that was lilac. "You say so…" I said softly putting them on and then came the dress. It was ivory and had been my great great great grandmother's. It was tradition for daughter's to wear it and I wasn't about to break it.
"Look at you…" my mama said sadly tilting my chin up so I'd look at her. "It won't be bad dear. I promise. This is for the best." She said gently helping me into my shoes and then we walked our way to the church where everyone even my papa was waiting. "Ready?" My papa asked linking elbows with me. "No. But I'll do this for you and mama." I said making him smile warmly.
The organ started up and those steps I took to Mr. Cade felt like they took forever. I was finally face to face with him and he had this twinkle in his eyes. I wasn't sure if he was happy, or if he was thinking of what we'd be doing later. Rather I'd like it...or not.
"And do you Rosemary Lyn Veloz take James Lee Cade to be your husband. To serve in sickness and in health. Till death do you part?" The preacher asked me and I was silent. I looked back to my papa was coughing badly and my mama was patting his back to help him. I sighed then turned to the preacher. "I do." "Then I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." I felt his rough lips on mine and I hated myself for thinking this, but he was actually a good kisser. "Ladies and gentlemen Mr. and Mrs. Cade!"
I looked to my husband and he was beaming. We were all led outside to the repression and James as I should call him, seemed more eager to get a start in on the drinks than anything else.
I sighed some walking over to my mama. "Look at you. Mrs. Cade. Now I do expect at least one grandchild from you." She said making me giggle softly. "We will see mama. How are you doing papa?" I said then asked softly. "Better. Your old man still has some kick in him yet." He said sipping on some water.
"There's My beautiful bride." I heard James say then he handed me a drink. "To the Veloz for having such a beauty of a daughter that I can call my wife." He said and we clinked glasses taking a drink from them.
We walked hand In hand together and it felt nice. He wasn't what I had expected at all. At least he seemed to be a nice man.
That is until a week after our wedding night. I was closed up In the bathroom looking at the stupid test in my hands and groaned loudly. Yep I was pregnant. At first James had been rather nice and all but then he began drinking again and what's worse, I'm stuck in some rundown side of Tulsa, Oklahoma. When he said we'd be moving to the south I had imagined a farm of sorts or even a ranch would have been nice. Not some run down little House in need of repair.
Suppose the only good our the neighbors. The Curtis kind folks really and they have two boys already. Such sweet things they are. I groaned some opening the bathroom door and snuck my way out. James was passed out drunk on the soda and sure he never hit me. But he did love to yell so much so that the neighbors can hear him.
I made my familiar way down to the Curtis Home and gently knocked. "Oh if it isn't our neighbor Rosemary. How are you dear." Mrs. Curtis asked me gently. "Terrible. I'm pregnant and well...I'm not so sure if my husband will be thrilled about it." I said honestly. "You don't sound so thrilled about yourself dear." Mrs. Curtis pointed out to me. "James loves to yell at me for everything and I'm afraid if I should have a child, a son In Fact that James will raise a hand to him." I said honestly.
"I'll be sure to help your child in anyway. And word of the wise, this door here isn't ever locked at all." Mrs. Curtis said gently. "Thank you." I said softly to her. "Now you sit down mama. I can give you some old baby clothes. It's the least I can do." She said smiling softly at me.
"Oh you don't have to do that." I said softly making her give me a look. "Oh I insist." She said heading down her hallway and coming back with a small box for me. "Here. It's all yours and don't be afraid to come back here if you ever need anything else. Or even to just get away from that husband of yours. The doors always open." She said smiling at me. "Oh you're far too kind." I said standing up. "Here dear, I'll walk you home." She said grabbing her shoes.
"How do you like Tulsa so far?" "Hate it. There's hardly ever anything to do here." I admitted softly. "Oh dear it's not a bad town. The folks here might have records miles long but they are kind hearted. Even if most of those boys won't admit it." Mrs. Curtis said leading me up my driveway.
I was hesitant to step inside but had no other choice. "Bye." Mrs. Curtis said waving to me and I waved back. "There you are. Put that ass of yours to good use." He said grabbing it and giving a hash slap. "No james." I said shoving his hands from me. "You listen to me! I am the man of the house and what I say goes! And when I want to…" "I'm pregnant." I said making him go silent.
"No. Abort it." He said lowly. "I will do no such thing!" I snapped angrily to him. "It's your child or your father so which is it going to be." He asked me lowly. "What do you mean…." "I can't afford to be paying some old timer and having a new child too. So which is more important." He asked me fishing in his pocket for a pack of smokes and a lighter. "I won't let my child die." I said firmly. "So be it. I'll stop sending your folks money." He said seriously lighting up a smoke. He brought it to his lips and deeply inhaled it before blowing it out slowing.
I opened my mouth to argue but then snapped it shut. It was just better to keep silent about the matter.
It didn't feel right to me, to not be helping my folks out at all. James smiled at me and then dropped to his knees before my belly. "And you had better be good to your mama here. No makin her sick." He said scolding my no...our unborn child. I smiled warmly helping him up. "What's with the box." "Oh a neighbor of ours graciously gave it to us." I said softly walking over to it and opening it on the table. "You went to the curtis' again!" He snapped slamming his hand on the table hard.
"Their nice folks James." I said softly. "Nice folks. That Darrel Curtis Sr is a no good cheat!" James snapped bitterly. "I do recall you were the one that was cheating first James. He cheated a cheater. And besides it wasn't for anything much. Just ten packs of smokes." I said glaring at him. "Ten packs I could have very much liked to have!" "What's the big deal! You swipe them from the store all the time!" I said bitterly to him.
He snarled lowly stepping up to me and I stepped back. His hand was raised but he stopped himself. "Fine. Fine. I'll be in my room." He said lowly to me staggering off down the hallway. I put a hand to my
Stomach and sighed some. "Don't worry baby. I won't let papa hurt you. No more than he does me." I said softly.
It felt like those nine months sped by and before I knew it I was in a hospital bed about to give birth. It had been rough for me given James stopped paying my folks. I got news my papa passed and that my mama was even sick now too. I felt utterly
Helpless.
"Okay hon I need you to push for me nice and hard." The doctor said firmly to me. I did so and wound up screaming in agony as my inner walls expanded and then it was over. He was holding a screaming boy that looked almost like his grandfather. "You have a name for your child?" The nurse asked me, helping Johnny into my arms after the small tests ,being cleaned off and wrapped up. "Yes...Johnny. Johnny Cade." I said smiling. "After his grandpa." I added gently kissing the top of his head lovingly.
The nurse nodded exiting the room and leaving me alone with my precious little tan angel. "I promise I won't ever let you get hurt baby boy." I said gently to him.