Puzzleshipping4ever caught me on Gmail. Since she had been at camp we were thrilled. This contains mostly a huge idea for a crackfic, and does contain the spoiler hilarity line. It also has Ryo three months pregnant like he is in the mpreg. For those of you who don't know, Bakura is terrified of hospitals. I'm doing Bakura, Ryo, and Sanura (My RP character). Sanura is more or less me, my little side thoughts. Puzzleshipping4ever's gmail name is Kaigara, but we call her Michelle. I'm not gonna spell check this or edit it at all so hope you can read it :D
Kaigara: Hey guess what
I'm home
Sent at 10:17 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: so you shoudl like talk to me cause dads making me get off early tonight
Sent at 10:18 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: Fo serious where are you
Sent at 10:21 PM on Saturday
Ryo: I was in the shower
I set it to Busy
Sent at 10:27 PM on Saturday
Ryo: Okay, where are YOU?
I'm all alone pver here
over*
Sanura and Bakura are out
Sent at 10:31 PM on Saturday
Ryo: MICHELLE. The current mood swing is making me very lonely. Talk to me. Please?
Sent at 10:38 PM on Saturday
Ryo: Michelle, I'm gonna start crying.
Sent at 10:39 PM on Saturday
Ryo: :'(
I'm so alone
No one's home
I want Bakura
TALK TO ME
Sent at 10:43 PM on Saturday
Ryo: Fine, just ignore the pregnant boy. I'm gonna go cry in a corner until you GET THE FUCK ON. Or until Sanura and Bakura get home. Whichever comes first. :'(
Sent at 10:45 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: god damn it
Ryo: THERE YOU ARE!
Kaigara: I'm back I cry cause your nto on then dad sits down to talk milatry shit and i coem back and you wnated to talk
my lide fails
life
Ryo: I was so alone
I had been in the shower
I set it to Busy...
Bakura and Sanura aren't here
Just me
I was lonely
Kaigara: well now I iz back from talking to dad, apprently the military wnats my brain cause they clale dmy house wwhiel I was gone wanting to talks to me
Ryo: DON'T LEAVE ME
Well, you asked for stories and man do we have a story
Kaigara: I won't leave o.o untill 11:30 cause dad fails , and yes story story
Ryo: Guess why Sanura and Bakura have left me all alone
Wait
11:30 my time or yours?
Kaigara: Mine not yours and I havent a clue there can only be abillion and 2 reasons
Ryo: Because Sanura forced him to go to the hospital and didn't want me going all preggo over there
Bakura's in the hospital
She's with him
I want to be
Kaigara: why the hell is he in the hospital
Ryo: Marik pushed him off the roof
And he snapped both bones in his forearm
Then tried to split it himself
Kaigara: Damn it is Marik beign punished for it at leats soemwhat, and Kura you can't splint your arms if there both broken
wait fail
ones broken
Ryo: No, only his right arm is broken
I mean both the...what the hell arm the bones?
Radius and the Ulna this what this random website says.
Kaigara: Well Tell Kura when he gets home he's an idiot, what the fuck were they doing on the roof anyway
Ryo: I don't even know
But they're both at fault
Bakura pushed Marik first and it became them screwing around until Bakura fell
Then he punched Marik in the face
With the broken arm
Which is surprisingly the only time we got a shriek for him
from*
He was very good, we only got hisses and "Ow...ow...owowowow...ow."
But that isn't the end of the story
Kaigara: Jeeez thats not the end
Ryo: It started healing wrong.
both bones were snapped clean in two and we could tell it was screwing up
Sanura took hi to the hospital to get the bones rebroken and splinted correctly
Kaigara: Well at least she convinced him to go, and maybe this will teach them nto to fuck around on a roof
Ryo: Malik told Marik no sex for three weeks, so Marik learned his lesson
Bakura I'm more worried about
I can't threaten him with the same because we both know that sometimes the baby makes me reeeeeeeeally horny
I WANT TO BE WITH HIM
But he's also entered under my name so I can't just show up
Sanura said she'd be home around 11:30
It's 11:20
Sent at 11:20 PM on Saturday
Kaigara did not receive your chat.
Kaigara: Well it's nice to knwo you still get horny, well thats nice to know that I coem home to well Bakura and Marik being a idiot I swear if Marik comes to sulk at my house again...He's going in my closet
(resent)
Ryo: (thank you)
Malik was really pissed
I've never seen him that mad
I was scared for him and I don't even like Marik
Sent at 11:24 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: Marik a good guy when's he's nto being a totally crazy idiot, which can be rare at times and Malik mad = run like you when your mad I wouldnt wnat to be on either end of your guys anger
Ryo: Nice to know I'm scary
People view me as the soft and gentle one just because Kura's my yami
3 more minutes and they'll be home :)
I at least hope the cast makes him more comfortable
He wasn't sleeping at night
Trying to find a position where he could both hold me and not be in pain
He slept when I woke up and he didn't have to hold me
Sent at 11:28 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: D: damn it he is so stubborn
Ryo: He really is
I HEARD THE DOOR OPEN
Sanura Seikatsu has joined.
Bakura Touzoku has joined.
Sanura: Don't listen to anything he says
He's drugged up out of his mind
Kaigara: Thats interesting, so how was the trip?
Sanura: Painful
Bakura wanted out the whole time
Then they drugged him out with painkillers
And all coherent thought abandoned him
Bakura: I just saw a pony in the yard
Sanura: There's no pony in the yard, Bakura
Kaigara: is it ok to laugh
me: ((I''m giggling like an idiot and we just started. That was the point of drugging him. I've always wanted to write Bakura drugged up))
((Just wait'll I get to my secret-weapon-all-caps line))
Ryo: I missed you, Kura!
Bakura: Fluffy hikari~ ilunlm
Kaigara: Kura is funny I laugh at you and yay for Ry
Sanura: I don't even know what to do with him like this
I can't even make fun of him he's so screwed over
Like George Bush
Bakura: He looked like a monkey!
Ryo: Bakura, your giggle is scaring me
Kaigara: wiat he just giggled, damn he most be out-of-it if he's giggling
Bakura: There are rainbow colored spots everywhere
Sanura: Yeah...reeeeeeeally out of it
Bakura: They're pretty~
Sent at 11:37 PM on Saturday
Kaigara: I am laughing so hard right now, Kura are the colors purrty?
Bakura: Yes, they are
Ryo: Bakura, why don't you sleep the drugs off...
Bakura: Ryo will you marry me?
Ryo: We're already engaged, Bakura
Bakura: We are?
Ryo: Yes
Kaigara: Bakura, go back to your colors, careful of the flying fish though it might come after you
Bakura: Okay
Kaigara: shakes head
Bakura: Ryo, can I lick you?
Ryo: -_-
Sure
Bakura: Yaaaaaaaay
Kaigara: O.o
Ryo: wipes cheek
Bakura: I love you Ry
Sent at 11:42 PM on Saturday
me: ((I really want to unleash the secret-weapon-all-caps-line that Susan came up with...so I think I'll do that now. I was gonna save it but I don't feel like it))
Kaigara: ( you do that w you knwo what...I luv cussing)
Kura scary on drugs
Bakura: looks down Oh my gods...Ryo!
Ryo: What is it?
Bakura: grabs at chest MY BOOBS ARE GONE!
WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE!
Sanura: facepalm
Kaigara: stares at screen onc emroe before dying in her seat
me: ((exactly my reaction when Susan blurted it out when we we're talking about this))
Kaigara: ((kjikahwbew))
Bakura: THEY'RE GONE! JUST VANISHED!
CURSE YOU WILL WHEATON
Ryo: You never had boobs to begin with, Bakura
Bakura: RYO WE MUST GO TO THE THIEVING HOSPITAL AND GET THEM BACK
Ryo: Bakura, why don't we wait until the drugs wear off before doing that...
Bakura: NO YOU MUST PAY FOR THE SURGERY
Kaigara: Kura calm down the hospital didn't steal them they were just moved
Bakura: MY BOOBS ARE GONE NOT MOVED
Kaigara: No you see they took the bewbs and then they changed them and put them back
Sanura: Yeah, your boobs are now your balls
Bakura: SINCE WHEN AM I A GUY?
Ryo: Since forever...
Kaigara: facepalm
Bakura: Oh my Gods I have a PENIS
Ryo: Bakura, pull up your pants
((Turn this into a twoshot Y/Y?))
Kaigara: (( no idea what you said but yes))
me: ((Twoshot. Chapter 1: The accident. Chapter 2: Bakura drugged up out of his mind. The end))
Kaigara: (( go for its))
Bakura: But...But...Boobs are a source of power in a house...Bill Engvall said so...*sniff*
Ryo: You aren't crying are you?
Dammit, I'm supposed to be the emotional one
Bakura: HAVE YOU SEEN SANURA'S! I REFUSE TO HAVE LESS POWER THAN HER!
Sanura: I'm not dealing with him.
Sanura Seikatsu has left.
Kaigara: You can not do that to me thats just cruel I don't wanna deal with him I'll just end up pickign on him
Ryo: She's playing Sims...trying to make her Bakura sim cry
Kaigara: rolls eyes figures
Bakura: STOP BEING EMOTIONAL RYO. WE CAN'T BOTH BE CRYING AT THE SAME TIME
Ryo: So you admit to it
Bakura: MY BOOBS ARE GONE, RYO. THIS CALLS FOR GRIEVING
Ryo: sighs
Kaigara: Kura there not gone weve been throuigh this they just changed you still have them just differnt
Bakura: WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE!
I blame Kirbopher
It must be his fault
ZOMGWTFBBQ A BLUE EYES JUST FLEW BY THE WINDOW
Kaigara: ...Ry you got your hands full tonight
Ryo: Don't I know it
Bakura, No blue eyes just flew by the window unless it was Kaiba's ridiculous jet
Bakura: HI SETO
SUE THE HOSPITAL FOR ME PLEASE?
Ryo: facepalm
Sent at 12:00 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: stifles a laugh Kura why don't you just call Seto and tell him to sue them for you that way
Ryo: No, you didn't just tell him that...!
Bakura, put the phone down
Bakura: But I love it...
Ryo: That does it.
You win
You're never going back to the hospital if you need drugs in the process
You react too much to them
Bakura: But then I won't see Muffin the Unicorn anymore
Kaigara: your seeign things Kura there is no muffin unicorn
me: ((I don't know if I'm still on painkillers or hallucinations XD))
((Bakura's just fucked up at this point))
Kaigara: (( yea no kidding tho if he actaully made that call to seto I totally wnat a reocrding of that xD))
me: ((Done, I'll email the recording to you))
Kaigara: (( yessssssssssssssssss))
me: ((Ryo just let him have the phone))
Ryo: Go ahead I don't care
Anymore
I'm exhausted
Why do we always have so many problems?
Sent at 12:05 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: Because relaity and fate are a bitch?
Ryo: Don't I know that one
holds stomach
How's she for reality and fate?
Bakura: HE
Ryo: Oh, hey, we got something normal
Kaigara: hes too stubborn to let that one go even on drugs
Bakura: SETO HUNG UP ON ME
Kaigara: I wonder why
Bakura: SO DO I
MY ReASON WAS VALID
Kaigara: what did you tell him?
Bakura: That the hospital stole my boobs
Sent at 12:10 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: thats it, well I thought it woudl humor him
Ryo: I texted him in the middle of their conversation
Sent at 12:13 AM on Sunday
Bakura: How could you do that, Ryo?
It wasn't nice
Kaigara: Because hes Ry and he cna do w.e he wnats
Ryo: Actually I had to warn Seto not to take him seriously...although he probably wouldn't've anyway
Sent at 12:15 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: with a call like that I doubt he take it serious
me: ((Sent the recording))
Kaigara: (( snorts has read)
Ryo: Does Seto always read his texts out loud when he's on the phone?
Bakura: He does, actually
Kaigara: So you saying if I texted him liek I dunno "my mom baught me two cheesburges and this lady had a baby on the street" he totally read that outloud
Bakura: If he was on the phone with someone he would read it under his breath
IT'S A GIANT MUSHROOM!
MAYBE IT'S FRIENDLY!
Kaigara: ...
Ryo: Bed. Now.
Kaigara: Kura go to bed other wise the giant mushroom will eat you and yourt favorite knife
Bakura: Ryo, it's not my bedtiiiiiiiiiiiiiime
Ryo: Stop whining
Go sleep off the drugs
Or or or...umm...
I won't let you name the baby if it's aboy
Bakura Touzoku has left.
Kaigara: damn
Ryo: Ha! I didn't actually think it would work through the drug-induced haze
Guess he was still somewhat coherant
I wonder if I should tell him in the morning that I wasn't being serious
Kaigara: think of it this way, if he remembers you in trouble if nto scott free
Ryo: Because I've come up with jackshit for male names
EEh, I guess so
With the hormones making me horny I need a new threat when he toes the line too much
Sent at 12:24 AM on Sunday
Ryo: Bakura just asked a good, coherent question...
"How am I supposed to get my shirt off with one arm and a sling?"
I guess I have to go help him...
Sent at 12:27 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: Yea and I have to get off my comp
Ryo: Okay, I need to help Bakura get ready for bed
Then I guess I'll go to bed
Baby drains my energy like e leech
Kaigara: I bet, 2 week of hardly any sleep i feel like I coudl sleep for moons
Ryo: Tomorrow the real fun begins
Sanura said that the hospital says that he wont remember anything from when he was drugged
We can have fun with that
"Bakura, do you still want to go and get your boobs back?" and such
Kaigara: pfffft hellls yea
Ryo: Night
Kaigara: good night its so good ot be home
Ryo: It's so good to have you back
((Ugh I've reached total writers block. We need to muse the mpreg sometime soon))
Kaigara: Good to be back Ry it feels good to be back
(mkay maybe tomarrow when i'm not groggy as hell)
me: (( G'night. I think I'll put this on DevART))
Sent at 12:33 AM on Sunday
Kaigara: (Good night i'm going to go die on my bed now screw staying up a little later I'm fuckign tired)
me: ((XD Good night. Cya tomorrow))
Kaigara: (( night w and see ya tomarrow)
Sent at 12:35 AM on Sunday
Kaigara is offline. Messages you send will be delivered when Kaigara comes online.
I thoroughly enjoyed myself, although I admit to getting carried away with the whole boob thing. Whatever, we had fun. You wish you spend an hour and a half of your night writing this crack. Also, heres the email I sent Shell if anyone so desires to see the phone call:
The following is copied directly from the tape set into their answering machine.
Seto: Hello?
Bakura: Seto-you-have-to-sue-the-hospital-for-me-they-stole-my-boobs.
Seto: ...Run that by me again.
Bakura: You have to sue the hospital for me. NOW.
Seto: Why do I need to sue the hospital this time, Bakura? This isn't the first time you've brought this up.
Bakura: Because they stole something very important to me.
Seto: You mean you actually went to one?
Bakura: I WAS FORCED INTO IT.
Seto: It's after midnight and I've been working all day. I'd like to go to bed, so just tell me what they stole.
Bakura: THEY STOLE MY-
Seto: Hang on. I'm getting a text. *sigh* What does Ryo want? "Don't listen to him, the hospital gave him heavy painkillers. He's drugged up out of his mind."
Bakura: RYO, YOU TRAITOR, I AM NOT!
Seto: Just tell me what they stole so I can go to bed.
Bakura: MY BREASTS!
*click*
Bakura: SETO HUNG UP ON ME!
Bakura: SO DO I!
Bakura: MY REASON WAS VALID!
Don't own Yugioh, just own the references to my mpreg.
Cookie to everyone who caught the Avatar: The Last Airbender reference. Just had a whim to throw that out there at the time. He was becoming too much like the old, coherent Bakura I usually play.
Hopefully a new chapter of the mpreg will pop up shortly after our musing session tomorrow
Also, I'm not really sure where Will Wheaton and Kirbopher come into the picture, but for those who don't know, Will Wheaton is an actor on Star Trek and Kirb is on a Podcast we listen to called Wha-Chow!