The door opened, revealing her father. He looked nervous. "Kiddo...Daria...I have something to ask of you."
Daria was about to say something else clever, but the look on her father's face shut her up, and she just nodded.
"We both miss Helen, but it's time to move on. You see...there were certain...activities she did for me. Activities that...I need them, Daria. Goddamnit, I need them so bad, it hurts."
"Just what the hell are you talking about?" Daria asked sharply, her father's words more than a little disturbing.
"I...look, just come into my bedroom once I'm ready for bed, okay?"
"No. Wait, let me rephrase that: HELL no. What the hell are you thinking?"
Jake bit his lip and closed his eyes, clenching his fists in anxiety. He finally turned to the wall that separated Daria's and Quinn's room. "I suppose I could have your sister take care of my needs..."
Daria's eyes shot open in horor. "NO!" Jake turned back to her, and Daria crumpled in defeat. "I'll...I'll do it."
Jake patted his daughter on the shoulder. "Thanks, kiddo." He kissed her on the top of her head and left her to her own devices while he prepared for bed.
XXXX
Daria took a deep breath before she opened the door to her parents' - her father's room. Then she took another, and another. She was NOT prepared to do this. She turned and walked back to her room, but decided to move on to Quinn's door. Cracking it open, she watched her sister serenely sleeping.
"For Quinn," Daria whispered to herself.
She marched back resolutely and opened the door. "Hi, Dad," she said lamely.
"Hi, Daria," Jake said from the bed. "I need you to get on your hands and knees."
"...Okay." She did as he complied, keeping her head tilted up to see if he would move from his spot.
"Look under the bed."
Daria lifted up the bedskirt and peered into the darkness. She couldn't really make out anything, except for her mother's briefcase (sitting where it had been put the day Helen died). Unless he wanted her to use THAT in some obscene way, she didn't know what he wanted.
"I don't see anything."
"Okay, good." Jake sounded relieved. "Now go look in the closet."
Daria suppressed a shudder as she moved to the closet door. She had poked around inside once a year or two ago, and had found what she only assumed were her parents' role-playing clothes. And she had no desire to be a beautiful wild pony running free across the plains.
Opening the door, she saw the half-empty spot where her mother's suits used to be. The inconspicuous box holding the horrors of the mind was tucked away in one corner. Daria swallowed and went for the lie. "I don't see anything in here, either."
"Are you sure? You don't see any monsters?"
Daria whipped her head towards her father so fast she almost pulled a muscle. Then, she laughed out loud, laughing long and hard, tears of relief coursing down her cheeks.
"Hey, what's so funny?" Jake demanded as he pulled his sheets up around him defensively. "Are there any damn monsters or not? Come on!" he pleaded. But Daria was too busy roaring with laughter to answer him.
XXXXXXXXXX
SIKE!
I originally conceived of this as a short that I would have tossed in the Scenes That Should Not Be thread (because come on), but then I decided that throwing a little more emotion into Daria's actions would bring this up to the status of 'pretty good on its own'. Plus, I could definitely see canon Jake begging Helen to check under the bed and in the closet for monsters.
The title is, of course, a reference to Lot, THAT guy from the Bible. It was just a little extra bit of red herring foreshadowing.