Young and Beautiful
I FINALLY read the Infernal Devices, and it just reestablished my love for Magnus, as if such a thing need be reestablished because he is absolutely my favorite character. Which probably means he'll die in the last book. UGH. Anywho, because I read Infernal Devices I had to reread the entire series, I'm on City of Lost Souls now. Reading it, Lana Del Ray came to mind, and I was suddenly convinced that her song "Young and Beautiful" is solely about Magnus and Alec. So what do we do when we find a song we like, and a ship that sales strong and true (despite some complications) we write fanfiction. We write and we write and we write, and we hope that someone somewhere will review it because secretly we live off your opinion and apparently in this process we have also become Gollum precious. Oh god, what is my life? ANYWAYS. Here. Have some fluff. Spoilers for City of Lost Souls
Alec looked out of the window, flicking back the curtains over the twinkling city. His mind refused to rest, it just raced around and around with thoughts of immortality and old age and death. Magnus's face came up in his mind's eye, his perfect cheekbones, his spiked black hair, his yellow green cat eyes shining with love. Love for you. Alec reminded himself. But how long did love last? What was love anyways? Everyone seemed to think it was something different. He thought back to Jace's bitter tone, his serph blade glowing as he swiped it in a wide arc through the air in the training room.
"To love is to destroy Alec." Alec had looked at the younger man shocked, Jace stood with such familiarity, Alec knew every line of his parabatai's body. He knew the wiry muscles that slid around under his training gear.
"What do you mean Jace?" Jace's face looked racked with an odd mixture of grief and pity. Jace just shook his head and lunged into the air with a deadly grace.
"Someday you might understand Alec." He had said.
Now looking back on it, Alec couldn't help but wonder if Jace was right. If loving something was to destroy it. He thought back to Camille's offer. Would taking away Magnus's immortality be destroying him? Being immortal seemed so much of who Magnus was. His history was endless, his long life seemed to float around him like stars in the sky, each a memory, a person, a love lost, a death endured.
Death. Alec didn't fear death; he just feared what would happen after it. He feared that Magnus would go on; find another star, perhaps one that burned brighter than even himself. He shuddered and leaned his head against the glass, his breath fogging up the window. He thought of himself as he had been in the seelie court, and old man. The glamour was awful, but truth telling. Some day he would be an old man. And then would Magnus stay with him? He kept wondering what would happen after he died, but what if he didn't even have that long? What if, at the first sign of gray hair and wrinkles, Magnus vanished? The thought left Alec feeling hallow and empty inside. He clutched his arms around himself as if to keep from falling apart. Tears started to mist his vision.
"Alec? Honey what are you doing?" A soft voice asked from behind him. Alec spun around to see his boyfriend, his damp hair up in a towel and his plush zebra print robe wrapped around him snuggly. "What's wrong?" Magnus asked, worry laced all over his face.
"I'm just thinking . . ."
"Nothing good ever comes of that." Magnus said, a smile playing at the edges of his lips. He came forward and wrapped his arms around Alec. "You're so beautiful." He told the shadowhunter, pressing a kiss to his cheek. One of Magnus's hands floated up and stroked a black lock of hair back from Alec's face. Alec fought the tears that burned his eyes.
"Will you always love me Magnus?" He asked, his voice quivering pathetically. Shadowhunters weren't supposed to have voices that quivered pathetically.
"Is that what this is about? Questioning my love for you?" Magnus asked, pulling back to look into Alec's eyes. Alec bit his lip.
"I know you love me now . . . but will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful?" Magnus smiled gently and kissed Alec softly on the mouth.
"For one, you've been listening to Lana Del Ray a little too much, and secondly, yes, I will always love you. I will love you with wrinkles, I will love you with gray hair, I will love you when your back starts to go out and you are only able to eat oatmeal and have to use a cane. I will love you infinitely more because every second I spend with you just increases my love for you tenfold. So yes, Alexander, I will always love you." Alec's breath seemed to be stolen from him. How could this be possible? Could someone really love someone else that much? As much as Magnus claimed? Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus's neck and pulled him in for a kiss, this time lingering on the warlock's lips longer, pulling him closer. "You will always be beautiful to me Alec." Magnus whispered against his lips.
"I love you Magnus. I love you now and I will love you forever." Alec said, crying a little now. Magnus just kissed away his tears and held him until all his worries went away, until mortality and death and magic seemed to be a different universe, and all that existed was Alec and Magnus, floating amongst the stars.
Hot summer nights,
Mid July when you and I were forever wild
The crazy days city lights
The way you'd play with me like a child
Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful?
Will you still love me when I've got nothing but my aching soul?
I know you will.
I know you will.
I know that you will.
As Alec held his boyfriend, lost in his embrace, he suddenly felt that everything would be okay. Magnus really would love him forever. They would be together for as long as he lived, and suddenly, that was enough.