Warnings: Implied Pseudo-Incest
Another old one de-anon'd from Norsekink, was based off a song by Rihanna called 'Russian Roulette'. Please ignore my relative slandering of grammar.
The start was always seemingly innocent, as many things were between them.
He did not have to ask or demand an explanation when Loki had sought him out; Thor knew what was being offered here. This was just another of his brother's endless number of games - the only differences this time were the stakes.
The Trickster's hands were on his hips and his mere touch confirmed that suggestion enough.
"You've done this before." And it isn't a question, because this time Thor can tell. It made a twisted sort of sense that this is the kind of game his brother would love to play; that he would test the already frayed threads of trust between them. It was a game that involved matters of the heart.
And Loki just looks up at him with those eyes that see more than he ever wanted to admit, and he smirks with such unrestrained and honest amusement. Each of his words was drawn out tauntingly, "But not with you."
The Liesmith has told the truth. For all the different rounds they've gone, they have yet to cross this line.
If they betrayed each other now, there would be no going back. Their fragile peace would shatter. To him, Loki saw everything, could hide everything from him if he so desired. It was an unpredictable and ever changing situation - yet it was as breathtaking as standing on the edge of the Bifrost, looking into the swirling vortex below.
"It's okay to be afraid," Loki told him softly, innocently even, as arms rose to embrace him further.
His brother shouldn't have to tell him that - especially not as he was being pinned slowly against an apartment wall by welcoming arms. Thor was supposed to be the brave one, the bold one. He had faced foes thrice his size without hesitation. He was valorous and highly honored, and he had tackled all challenges brought before him, each one without showing any fear.
Why then did he feel so doubtful about something that should pale in comparison? Was it in the gentle way his brother was treating him, when usually he was just as sharp as one of the knives he wielded in battle? The threat was still there, even though he could no longer see the edge.
When Loki looked at him like this it was like he was seeing through him, could see every thought and feeling and weakness that Thor had ever had.
"Why do you want this?" Thor needed this answer, needed some semblance of his control back.
The cool hands that had pushed and guided him were directly on him now, light and teasingly tugging at his Midgardian clothes.
"Why do I ever want anything?"
Thor should be infuriated by the response; he usually was when he brother talked in riddles and half-truths. Now he just wished he could demand why his brother was being so calm and careful. Or at least he wished he could demand and then get an answer - an honest answer.
Loki doesn't seem to notice – or care about his inner turmoil over the situation when he asks,"Do you know what real courage is said to be?"
Thor didn't dare voice his doubts on what his brother would ever hope to know of real courage.
"Courage is feeling fear, but going on despite it," and Loki smiles knowingly at that.
"Loki…" He's surprised at how much his voice wavers as he says it. He begins to wonder if he has a chance to come out of this unhurt, or even if he will come out of this at all.
His brother takes that for an invitation to trail kisses down his neck, each one becoming more brutal, more teeth against his flesh than lips. And then a small whisper against his ear," You can quit now, leave now, if it is too much for you."
But they both know that the point of no return has already been reached. They both know that Loki's claws have dug in too deep and that Thor's pride is too great for them to walk away now.
"I'm not afraid," and Thor no longer knows who he's trying to convince.
"If you insist," Loki does not call him out on the lie, but he knows. He always knows.
His brother begins humming a foreign tune as he takes him by the hand and leads them through Loki's temporary dwelling; it was odd, but much preferable to the crushing silence he was used to feeling when in his presence.
Loki acknowledged his unspoken question, "A trifling, yet fitting melody native to this world that you love so dearly." If anyone else had said it then it would have been a simple statement, but with his brother even that manages to sound like a hidden insult.
And he feels frozen to his core as he's divested of his clothing by his brother's magic. And he can't breathe when divested of his pride by his brother's very being.
'Play a game with me, brother.'
'It's one I've played before.'
'Give me your heart, brother.'
'Else I'll crush it to the floor.'
'Do not lie to me, brother.'
'I will always know.'
'It's just a game, brother.'
'Now am I friend or foe?'