The interstate seemed to stretch out endlessly ahead of him. As the glare of the headlights in the opposing lane flooded out his vision, his grip on the steering wheel tightened. The GPS had remained silent for over an hour, but the sound of the radio provided some sort of distraction for him as the miles dragged by slowly.
Heavy lids began to flutter over his jade green eyes, and his hand reached instinctively for the radio, cranking the volume up and shaking his head in hopes of staying alert. Keeping a loose but steady hold on the wheel, Kendall stole a glance at the girl in the passenger's seat. She'd fallen asleep fifteen minutes into the drive, her knees pulled up to her chest in the car seat and her head resting against the door. Loose dirty blonde curls masked her eyes, her full lips parted as she dreamt. It was a sight that would've made Kendall weak in the knees before, but now, no matter how many times he tried to rekindle the feeling, he just couldn't feel the sparks he had for her before.
That night, he felt nothing but the slow burn of resentment eating away at his gut.
He should've known that things wouldn't be the same as before, but when she'd made her way back into his life, he just couldn't push her away. Seeing her standing at his door, her suitcases at her feet and that faint hopeful smile clinging to her lips, he couldn't fight the emotions that washed over him, a flood of memories detailing the beautiful way things used to be. He had taken her back without an explanation, and they were so eager to pick up where they'd left off.
In reality, it was impossible. Time had molded them into two completely different people. The distance had worn them thin, and as much as he tried to deny it, there was still a part of him that hated her for leaving him. He understood, she had to move in order to pursue her career, and the more he thought about it, the more he realized that it wasn't the fact that she'd moved away that tore him up inside, it was how easy she made it seem. After two years of being together, Jo hadn't struggled with the decision to leave. When pitted against her future, Kendall didn't stand a chance. That was what stung the most, how little he meant to her when she was such a huge part of his life.
He had been devastated when she left, but with each passing day, the pain eased away a little more. Without the burden of being tied down in a relationship, he had more time to focus on himself. His friends also proved to be a much-needed distraction from his heartache. It was true what they said about time healing all wounds because as the months rolled by, she began to fade away.
As usual, Jo had decided to strut her way back into his life at the worst possible time.
Kendall had finally reached the point where he could whole-heartedly say he was over her. He had moved on, started a fresh relationship with someone new, a girl who was everything that Jo could never be.
Lucy was a reckless sort of beautiful with those vibrant red streaks in her jet-black hair and her devil-may-care attitude. She wasn't the type of girl that Kendall would've normally been drawn to, and she wasn't exactly the type of girl he'd bring home to meet his mother, but there was a charisma about her that burrowed its way into his bones and kept him tossing and turning all night. She wasn't weighed down by Jo's constant insecurities or jealousies. Her brown eyes weren't fixated on some possible future between them, on an elegant wedding gown or a white picket fence. She just wanted to have fun, and since there was none of that pressure, Kendall felt more comfortable in her presence. Being with Lucy was like a breath of fresh air.
Whatever chemistry they had dissipated the moment he found Jo at his door.
As badly as he longed to pursue things with Lucy, Jo was his first real love, and he just couldn't let her go. It was a decision he was growing to regret with each passing mile marker.
The dials on the dashboard cast an eerie lilac glow across her sunkissed skin as she shifted in her sleep. He didn't understand why she was so tired; she hadn't seemed to enjoy the concert he'd taken her too. Instead of dancing or thrashing around with everyone else, she'd stood in the crowd with her arms crossed against her chest and her lips mashed into a firm line. Granted, it wasn't exactly her type of music, but he had the best intentions. In his mind, driving to a concert out of state was a nice change of pace from the painstakingly average dinner and movie dates they'd been having since they got back together. That was just Jo's nature, she'd always been a creature of habit. Her stability used to be one of the traits he'd admired about her, but now, it only got under his skin. It was difficult for him to comprehend how someone so accustomed to living the same routines could take off across the globe without a second thought.
They were both walking contradictions, and Kendall couldn't bring himself to judge her. He was just realizing that she wasn't what he wanted anymore. What they had in the beginning was an illusion of perfection, and he was left emotionally exhausted from trying to force the pieces together. It wasn't worth it anymore. He wasn't happy like he used to be, he was miserable, and a part of him sensed that Jo's heart wasn't entirely in it either. She just clung to him because she was scared to see him with somebody else, and though Kendall had those same fears, he knew deep down that he had to take that risk.
Jo slept soundly for the remainder of the drive back to their building, and once they were safely parked in the lot, Kendall reached over to wake her. His fingers curved around her shoulders, providing a gentle pressure as he slowly shook her.
"Jo! Jo!" he whispered hoarsely in her ear. "Sweetie, wake up! We're home."
Her syrupy eyes were glazed over with sleep as she stared up at him, struggling to take in every feature of his face.
"Really? Did I sleep the entire time?" she mumbled groggily, stretching her arms and legs out in the seat before opening the car door.
He nodded his head before he left a soft kiss on her forehead. "It's okay. I'll walk you up to your apartment, and we can go out for breakfast in the morning."
"Sounds like a plan," she replied with a smile.
The two of them walked across the parking lot hand in hand, and Kendall couldn't deny the nagging feeling that he hung on the verge of something new and unknown.