Dear idiotic Editor,
It's time to get your fat head out of your even fatter arse! You're an idiot and a hypocrite and don't get me started of that failure of a reporter Skeeter! Is this a newspaper? I don't think so! You never print why this "Boy-Who-Lived" is a atterion-seeking prat or a deluded idiot! In fact, I've met the kid.
You want to know who your beloved hero is? He's a tiny 15 yr old who slept in a cupboard for the first 10 yrs of his life. He's only had a bedroom for the last 5 yrs because he got his letter to Hogwarts! He lives with a horse/cow/giraffe, whale, and a baby elephant (a.k.a. Petunia, Vernon, and Dudley Dursley) who hate him and have abused him his whole live.
If that's not bad enough lets look at his time at Hogwarts. In first year, Quirell had Lord Voldemort on the back of his bloody HEAD! HIS HEAD! The idiot known as Dumbledore has employed these people during Harry's time at Hogwarts: a death eater (Mr. Severus Snape), an imposter (a.k.a. death eater 2/ Mr. Barty Crouch Jr.), a guy with Voldemort on the back of his head (Mr. Quirnus Quirell), an idiot (Gilderoy Lockhart), a ministry loving, stuck-up, half-breed hating, flat-out bitch,(Ms. Umbitch, I mean Umbridge), a sherry-drinking, idiot who wouldn't recognize a prophecy shoved up her prophetic arse, (Ms. Sybil Trelwaney). I think that covers it.
I'm not going to go any farther. Maybe you can try and interview him or something. Can't be too hard? He is just a 15 yr old boy who can beat Voldemort in a duel after all?
Star B