Title: Influencing My Dreams

Author: ValaGillian

Category: Stargate SG-1 - Romance

Summary: Sam's Jack or Pete dilemma has finally reared its head into Sam's professional and personal life. It's even influencing her dreams. She has to make a decision and she has to make it now.

Rating: PG

Part One: Another Nightmare

It was 4:00 A.M. when I awoke from another nightmare. I shook my head and found the cool glass of water on the nightstand. My skin was covered in a thin film of sweat and I emptied the glass in one swift swallow. After setting it back down on the nightstand I fell back onto the pillows.

These nightmares are becoming more intense every week and I don't know how much more I can take before they declare me officially insane. No, I can't let this disrupt my work. Not after that ordeal with Oorlin. There was no excuse for that man, alien, whatever he was. No one believed me and for the first time in my life I felt like a real alien crackpot that is too paranoid for her own good. I mean, who falls in love with an alien, this isn't some weird offset of Earth Girls Are Easy. I shook her head, why am I thinking about this right now? It's time to get up and get ready for my everyday run of the mill job. I whispered, "yeah right," to myself and smirked as I got up and walked into the bathroom.

When I turned on the bathroom light it was as if everything was thrust back into the world of reality and my nightmare almost disappeared from my consciousness all together. I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize the night of the living dead figure I saw standing there. I forced my stare from the mirror and down to the sink where I grabbed the only toothbrush on the rack made for six and brushed some toothpaste on very sloppily. I was late. Again. They're going to know something's wrong if I keep this up. I'm usually the first one in and the last one out if I leave at all.

When I was done with my teeth and walked over to the closet. I grabbed fresh underwear, yesterday's bra, a white tee, and some jeans. I threw them on brushed my fingers through my hair and grabbed the keys.

On the way out I noticed the two-week-old mail strewn across the floor by the back door near the mail slot. I didn't bother to go pick it up, what's one more day? I stepped outside and was automatically greeted by a cool brisk of winter wind. Lovely. I tried to shield my face from the wind as I headed towards my car with no luck. As I headed down the steps I slipped on some kind of plastic and hit the driveway hard.

When I opened my eyes I saw a blurry shade of red and then as my bearings returned I recognized what I had tripped over. There were a dozen roses wrapped in plastic to shield them from the winter wind near my head. I smiled and grimaced at the same time as I stood up. The tag on the roses read: To Sam From Pete, Dinner 9:00 p.m. My Place.

Once I arrived at Cheyenne Mountain, an all too common site, I checked in with the guard and headed off towards the locker room. When I got there I just walked right in without checking my watch. I went over to my locker and started to turn the combination lock when I heard a familiar sound.

The whistling was coming from one of the shower at the back and as I got closer I knew that whistle could only be coming from one person, and that person was Jack O'Neill. For some unknown reason, my heart starting beating double-time and my immediate instincts told me to start backing up and get the hell out of dodge. But I stayed.

I was just about to betray myself totally by getting closer when he drew back the curtain. I was totally bewildered and unconsciously staring. He had either thrown on a towel before I came in or I was just too out-of-it to notice.

"Carter?" He questioned, evidently very bewildered himself. I shook my head downward to the lime green linoleum and whispered "Sorry, sir. I didn't check my watch. I didn't realize it was the men's locker room right now." I prayed to myself that he wouldn't question why I was standing directly in front of his shower. Hell, I didn't even know the answer to that myself.

He shook his head in the affirmative and walked off into a secluded portion of the locker room. I could hear him from the other room when he said, "oh, don't let me bother you, Carter. I'll be out in a couple of minutes." I turned in a semi-circle still trying to figure out what I was doing and walked back to my locker.

After changing I went to the Gate Room to see what was going on since I was late after all. There was surprising nothing life threatening happening at the particular moment so I decided to go down to my lab and maybe call Pete.

By the time I had finished everything I had to do in the lab I did pick up the phone. I hesitated before calling. What would I say? I'm still not very experienced at this whole relationship thing. Would I call him baby, honey, sugar-pie, what? I decided against it and slammed the phone back down on the receiver as Jack came in unannounced as usual.

"Wrong phone number?" He said in his casual humor. I smiled for the first time today and said, "yeah, something like that." He smiled back and looked at the contraption sitting on the main desk. "What's this?" My expression changed and I know he sensed it. I opened my mouth to go on about the prototype when he evidently changed his mind. "Wait, I don't think I really want to know." He smiled at me reassuringly and I could feel myself become physically buoyant again. "Carter," he said almost as if he was embarrassed or scared. "What do you say we blow this rat hole and go have dinner?" Wow! Reality check… I know he could see the total shock on my face and that my mouth must've been hanging wide open. This could be the chance of a lifetime… But I suddenly remembered Pete's roses from this morning and my rude awakening to them. My spirits automatically plummeted into the dark depths of a bottomless pit; a pit I thought of as my heart when I faced the inevitability of my decision. The same decision that has been distracting me at work, harassing me when I'm off-duty with Pete, and even worse, manipulating my dreams into nightmares. I realize that he's observed my facial expression and that I'm just standing there comatose and has decided to tell me every reason in the book why that was a bad idea. I snap out of it just as it feels like something inside has snapped as well. I think it was my fear. I've made up my mind and it's time that he knew the truth…

To Be Continued. Chapter 2 Coming Soon!