Disclaimer: Don't own Dragon Age or the Show Stopping Number game. For those who don't know, Show Stopping Number was a game or Whose Line is it Anyway where the actors would have to break into a song and dance when they heard a buzzer. The catch? They had to sing the song based off of the last line they said. It's hilarious to watch and I hope just as funny to read. Go look it up on Youtube (the U.S. Senate one or the hole factory in particular) if you want to smile.
Bodhan was waiting for the Warden mage and her party to return to camp at the entrance and not at his cart. The three other party members were far too tired from the day's excursion to care and so as Amell stood back to speak to the merchant, Alistair, Leliana and Terwilliger the mabari left for the comfort of the fire.
"This is a surprise, Bodhan." Danae commented with an amused grin, "Did you miss me that much?"
If the dwarf got her flirty joke, he did not appreciate it enough to acknowledge it but rather set a palm sized black stone into Danae's hand. Strange etchings covered the surface in a circle. "What is this, Bodhan," Danae wondered as she ran a finger over the carved surface, "some kind of rune?"
"I would tell you if I could. Found it the other day on the road but m'boy can't make heads or tails of it." Bodhan replied with a shrug, "I figured that with you being a mage, you could tell me if it was of any value."
Danae nodded and motioned towards the camp. As they made their way to the fire, she took another look at the stone. Never one to enjoy long silences, Danae spoke absentmindedly, "Have you heard any rumors lately?"
Bodhan spoke what he heard on the road, as requested but Danae was only half paying attention as she took a closer look at the item. The stone felt cool to the touch and seemed highly polished. While she could not make out the marking on the front the words 'made by Bobbit' was carved clearly on the back.
They had reached the fire side just as Bodhan finished with his news. "That's what I heard on the road, anyhow. Take it for what it is." He concluded.
Without warning a short buzzing noise sounded throughout the camp at the merchant's words. An upbeat piano tune filled the air and the Warden jumped back in surprise as Bodhan began to bounce in his place. He began to half-sing as he paced and waved his hands on either side of him at chest level.
"That's what I heard on the road anyhow
This is when you should say 'Wow!
Gee-golly…gosh and hey!
I'll spend some coin on supplies today!' "
The dwarf then fell silent, with a puzzled look on his face. Danae regarded him warily, though she noticed her five companions were totally oblivious to what had just occurred. Morrigan was off at her own fire; Sten was growling at the dog; Leliana was admiring the patterns of her bruises and Alistair was attempting to make dinner. They showed no signs of even noticing that the dwarf unexpectedly broke into song.
"Er…" Danae began, at a loss of what to say. "Was that…necessary?"
The merchant looked just as startled and confused. "I don't know what came over me. I just felt the urge to sing the last sentence I said."
In her hand, the stone seemed to be radiating warmth and glowed in the firelight. It was an odd thing to consider, but Danae swore that the stone was pleased at what had just transpired.
"Was it me," Bodhan began, "Or was that buzzing and music coming from that stone?"
The two regarded the stone with suspicion before the mage replied, "No. I heard it too. Maker! What the sod is this thing?"
The buzz sounded again and the music began with a dum-da dum-dum-dum. Danae found herself marching back and forth, as though her feet had minds of their own. No matter how she willed her feet to stop, they kept moving. Bodhan was moving as well, his feet making him march backwards as his hands flew out at chest height again.
This time, the music and scene caught the attention of those close to the fire. Danae felt her cheeks blush as she was unable to stop from belting out in an alto voice,
"Maker! What the sod is this thing?
It kinda makes me…want to sing.
I don't know why, or how to stop it
The writing on the back says 'made by Bobbit'"
As the music died away, Danae found herself suddenly in control of her feet. The stone in her palm seemed to radiate glee. She turned it over to show the name to the dwarf. "You see?" She implored as Alistair and Leliana approached them.
"What was that all about?" Alistair wondered with a wolfish grin and a mocking dance to go with it.
"If you were interested in being a bard, you should have said something." Leliana teased an impish glint in her eye.
Danae gave the two a scrunched face that said she was not amused. Her mage's curiosity won over her embarrassment though, and she showed the two the stone. "I can't be sure, but I think there is an enchantment on this that makes a person sing when the rock makes this buzzing sound….at least that is what happened with Bodhan and myself. There are markings on one side but I can't make them out."
"Oh, how fun!" Leliana exclaimed, taking the stone and turning it over.
"Well," the merchant cut in eagerly, "is it valuable?"
Danae was about to reply when Morrigan angrily stalked up to the group with half a rabbit in her hands. Terwilliger trotted happily to his mistress and gave a happy bark at Morrigan.
"Ugh." Morrigan began, shaking the dead hare in front of her, "Look what your fool dog left in my pack."
Terwilliger barked happily in response as if asking the Witch of the Wilds if she liked his gift. Morrigan fixed her eyes on the hound and replied, " A putrid half-eaten hare is not something a woman wants to find in her unmentionables."
At that very moment the stone let out a third buzz and the piano music sounded once more. Morrigan began to dance as Danae and Bodhan joined her, looking as if they would do anything to stop whatever the stone was doing to them.
"I just found a half-eaten hare, " Morrigan sang, motioning to the carcass and then to her lower half.
"In the clothing I wear down there
I don't want it so take it back
Beast, do this again and I'll have your ass!"
As the song ended Morrigan continued her conversation with Danae as if nothing just happened. Meanwhile, Alistair decided to answer Bodhan's question for him.
"Oh, yes." Alistair appraised, taking the stone from Leliana. "It's priceless."
A/N: Well, here it is. A testament that I should never play Dragon Age then watch Whose Line reruns. I plan to have Leliana, Alistair and Sten succumb to the stone's silliness next. If there is a character you would like to see break into song, or a line you would like to have turned into a show stopping number, tell me. I am totally open to requests.