The big mansion on the meteor stood grim and cold. All members of the house were now well asleep. All except for one: John.
He tossed and turned in his bed, not getting a single wink. He finally lied still enough to stare at the ceiling for a moment. He turned down the sheets and stumbled out of bed to turn his light on and put his glassed atop his nose. After his eyes adjusted, he calmly looked around for something to do; something to make him fall asleep.
The first thing he looked at was the glass of warm milk Jade had brought him when she heard music playing from his room hours ago. He took a sip but the milk was lukewarm now and made his stomach turn.
The next thing he saw was a picture that had been taken on Thanksgiving. All sixteen of them had been sitting at the table, while Rose had set the tripod up raced back to her chair in time for the picture to take. In the picture, John was sitting in between Vriska and Karkat, which, in hindsight, hadn't been the best idea. For the first time, John took a closer look at the picture. Jade and Kanaya had forced everyone to keep a copy for Christmas, which was over three weeks ago.
John looked at Karkat's face. He had his usual smug, angry face on, but his eyes said something different. Karkat's eyes were glancing in the direction of John's neck. They were full of nothing but lust.
John suddenly felt a rush of adrenaline. He looked around the room for his shoes and silently hovered just above the ground, using his windy thing, all the way to Karkat's door.
John found himself in a rut. He looked at Karkat's door then back at the hallway, then to his hands. He bit his lip a few times, tasting the blood. He felt like the blood gave him confidence. With a final rush of adrenaline, John knocked softly three times.
There was some stumbling, the sound of large items being shoved sleepily, and heavy footfalls on the ground. John could hear Karkat moan through the five-inch thick wood door.
"What the fuck is going on? I want my fucking sleep, you hear me?" The angry troll ranted in a hoarse whisper as he opened the door.
Then all at once Karkat's eyes seemed to focus and John's heart skipped a little beat and Karkat said softly, "Oh…Hey Egbert."
"Hey Karkat."
"Um, what's up?"
"I, uh, came to ask you a question."
Karkat's eyes narrowed, "Ok. What?"
"Well, um, it's a question about…um…romance." John stuttered and looked at Karkat's room. There was a candle lit in the corner. How romantic, "You see, I really like someone and I've heard you give, uh, good advice."
"Yeah, well, that's an opinion. Anyway, spit it out. I'm tired as hell."
"Oh…um…Can I come in? I just want to make sure no one else is, you know, around to hear," John's heart was beating faster by every second as Karkat sighed heavily, and bowed sarcastically with an open arm in the direction of his bed.
"Sit. Ask. Go," Karkat said as he shut the door.
"Oh, well, I really like…someone. And I don't know what to do…" John trailed off.
Karkat folded his arms, "What am I supposed to do with that, fuckass? That's like saying 'I want food.' Well you gotta be more fucking specific," Karkat eyed him slowly, picking up his own suspicions and inferring what John was thinking.
John ducked his head a bit, no sure what to say, and he sat in the middle of the bed, legs criss-cross. He shifted around a bit uncomfortably, wondering if this had been a good idea, "Well can't you just tell me what to do, like, in general?"
Karkat rolled his eyes, still standing, "Well can you at least tell me what kind of relationship it is you're going for? So far, I wouldn't be able to tell you shit."
"Okay, um, I know it's not moirailligence. And I'm sure it's not auspistice. But I don't really know after that…"
Karkat rubbed his forehead, "Alright, dumbfuck. I'm going to assume that you mean a matespritship, because you clearly just have room for red feelings," Here he paused, raising an eyebrow waiting for John's reaction. But John did nothing, "Well since I don't even know the fucking gender, this is going to be fucking difficult to explain."
John nodded his head and Karkat lied down on the bed, "I just want the.. um.. basics."
"Sure, sure. Okay, come here," The troll patted the space beside him for John.
"You want me to… lie down?" John said warily.
Karkat rolled his eyes, "You want fucking advice or not? This is the first lesson. Get close to the person at meals and be around them. Don't be a fucking stalker, though. They'll just get creeped out that way."
John reluctantly crawled over to Karkat's side of the bed and scooted next to the troll, his entire body shaking. This was the worst idea I've ever had.
"Now the next thing you wanna do is tell them how you feel. This is the hardest part, so I've been told." Karkat was staring at the ceiling, perfectly comfortable, with his arms splayed by his head.
"Oh, um, okay. What's after that?" John kept his arms stiffened to his sides and his ankles together. He felt so awkward, and didn't have the same nerve as he did when he had come, to leave.
"Well, when the time is right, and I mean right, because you can fuck shit up if the timing is not right, you kiss them."
John was growing steadily more and more uncomfortable with the situation, "Okay," He looked over at the troll shyly, wanting so desperately to leave.
Karkat looked over at the human grimly, wanting to desperately to just reach over and make him bleed. His contempt heightened as he saw the human cower. His beady eyes widened as Karkat threw himself on top of the human, grabbing both his wrists, digging into the skin. John let out a welp, but Karkat smiled to his delight. The troll reached a bloody finger to John's neck, the human wimpering away.
"Karkat, stop!" John writhed for freedom and finally got it as Karkat rolled off, folding his arms across his chest. John scrambled off the bed, and curled into a little ball on the floor. All that John had wanted to accomplish was to talk to Karkat and see if maybe, just maybe, he would want to be matesprits.
"You're a wimp, John," Karkat muttered.
"I'm not a wimp. I'm just not a homosexual."
"Dear gog! Will you fucking shut up about that! Your mind is so blind-sighted to love. It doesn't fucking matter. Forget it. Get out of my room," Karkat tilted over and blew out the candle that John thought was romantic.
"Karkat, I-"
"I said, get the fuck out of my room! Go!" Karkat yelled. John was sure the others could hear him shout.
"Fine!" John ran to the window, his closest escape. He opened the glass up and climbed up to the edge, and when he felt Karkat's eyes staring into his back, he jumped off the ledge with his last ounce of confidence.