Saying Goodbye

Morhange's Father

Narrated by Pierre Morhange

My mother walked from the elevator and into the bright light of the hallways so I could clearly see the tears that ran down her face, but she wiped them away before I could ask why she was crying. She had been crying all week, to the point where her eyes, green like mine, were bright red. It was my father I knew it was, but I had no idea what was wrong, everything had been so insane since about a week ago.

Mom had sent me to my room after I had announced that several men dressed in all white were walking down the path. I went, but kept my ear pressed against the door and listened, they said Dad wasn't doing well, and then described what he had. Dad was in the hospital, I knew that much, but he had been there for about a month. Mom told me he was coming home soon, but something had happened, something had gone wrong.

This had puzzled me, he was always really happy, and he never seemed to be sick. I needed a father, where would I be lead if I didn't have one?

Mom walked me to a door that was open slightly, I could see one bed with someone in it, but I didn't know who it was. This room was dark, with only light that filtered throw the dingy curtains from the setting sun. The person in the bed coughed and I drew backwards, clutching my mother's arm tightly.

"Go on," she told me while blotting her eyes.

I didn't move, I was frightened, after all I was only five, and death was not something I had gotten time to get used to. The hallway bright, but it felt so dark, so cold, I felt sick to my stomach, I wanted to vomit. I could feel my legs shaking beneath me and I looked back up at my mother.

I was confused, why was this happening to us? We had had a great life; I had just started school, didn't he want to see me finish my first year? Didn't he want to help me with homework, or come to my sports games? But apparently he didn't.

"Go on," my mother repeated patting me on the back.

I looked up at her; I didn't know what to do, so the product of her efforts was another step backward on my part.

I shook, "W-why?" At this point I had no idea why she had told me to go in, this was not my father's room, his was downstairs, where the people without severe problems were, he couldn't be here.

"God Damn it Pierre! Go!" she wept covering her eyes.

My lip began to quiver, I felt like I was going to cry my heart out. She never raised her voice, she must have hated me, what did I do? It must have been something awful, I must have disappointed her.

"D-don't… don't, it's okay," I heard a weak and ailing voice from the bed, it was rough and dying, but I knew it.

My mother began weeping harder and ran from the room, as I took a step in.

"Pierre?" asked the voice.

Hot tears of sadness ran down my cheeks and I rushed for the bed, but gasped upon seeing my father. He didn't look like the Dad I knew, the Dad who would say, "How's school going buddy?" when I would jump onto his hospital bed after a long day of learning, the Dad who would ruffle my hair before offering up some of his own meal to me and sending me back to Mom, the Dad who would play football with me in the backyard and always pretend not to see me as I dribbled the ball into his goal. This Dad was tired, fading, sick, but more than that, he was anxious to see his son one last time.

Tears leaked down my face and into my shirt, I now understood, Mom had taken me here to say goodbye.

"D-Dad, you're coming home right?" I said between the gasps of sobs, I was crying so hard that I couldn't get enough tears out.

"Pierre… can you be strong for me?" he asked hopefully, wiping the tears off my face and then stroking my hair, "Because, I need you to be the big boy of the house now. Your Mom needs you to do this for me, I need you to do this for me."

"B-b-but I won't have to, right, because you'll get better… you'll come home, we can be a family again."

"No, Pierre," he said holding my shoulders and then wrapping me in a hug as I shook with sadness.

He couldn't go, he just couldn't; he was part of our family, he was my safety during thunderstorms, my shelter against bad, and my hero to chase the monsters from the shadows that lurked in my life. How was this happening?

He held me tightly in his arms and said softly, "When I married your mother, I thought my life couldn't get any better… and then you came along, and suddenly it did. There is nothing in my life that I regret, and I hope that you live to say the same.

I put my arms around my father's neck and hugged him like I had done when I sat on his lap in the hammock during the summers when we would count the stars to go to sleep, or like when the rain would fall heavy on our rooftop and he would have to sing me to sleep, or now, the last time I would ever hug my father.

"I love you Dad," I said as he patted my back.

"And I love you, more than you'll ever know…. Can you do it?" he said putting me on the ground, "Can you be the big boy of the house, and make sure your Mom stays safe?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat and nodded as he kissed my forehead and a tear rolled off his cheek into my hair.

"Now go ahead, if you remember me, remember what fun we had, and build from there."

"Will you remember me?" I asked slowly.

"Of course I will, and this isn't the end; we'll see each other again…. I really am just so proud of you. If I ever said anything that hurt you, I'm sorry, I just want you to know that I couldn't have asked for a better sone... a beter child."

I began to shake again as I nodded once more and closed the door as I left, my mother waiting for me on the other side. I took her hand, and held it tightly as we went, leaving the person who had really made us a family behind.

Hi, thanks for reading this tiny one-shot, I hope you liked it, and hopefully understood why I thought Morhange acted the way he did in the movie. Thanks again, and please review

Tennessee