Yes, I'm working on the next chapter of "Miles to go Before I Sleep," but I've had this one floating around for a while. Enjoy! Happy ending guaranteed!
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A wish, whether upon a star or quietly whispered to oneself in the middle of the night, is a profound expression of desire. But often, despite the pure want shown they often do not come true.
"Bones, do you ever wish things were different?" Booth said, lounging on the couch in the spacious office the Jeffersonian provided.
"Of course not," she lied, putting the final organizational touches on the paperwork regarding their recently closed case. "There is no use to wishing, as only action can make a desire a reality. But I don't understand the motivation behind your inquiry."
But in Brennan's mind, she was screaming "yes." Yes she wished things were different between them. Yes she wished that he hadn't come home from Afghanistan with Hannah who was too damn likeable. Yes, she wished for another change with him.
"Just wondered," he shrugged, desperately hoping that she hadn't recognized the tinge of want in his voice. He assumed she didn't; she wasn't very good at the touchy feely sort of things.
Truth be told, he also wished things were different. Hannah was…great, meaning that he could really find no concrete fault with her. He felt as if he should love her, but nevertheless, remained steadfastly committed to their romantic relationship. But yet, as someone who believes in love at first sight, and in love that can transcend any barrier, it was impossible to convince himself that Hannah was "the one." "The one" woman for him had been around for years, in fact, she was in the very same room as him.
"I doubt that your question in particular was motivated by curiosity alone," Brennan pulled on a pair of reading glasses, squinting at the fine print.
If she could wish for anything, it would be for a heart to love him as he deserved.
"Just drop it," he growled. The last thing he wanted was her to puck apart his rather obvious (or seemingly so) motivation.
If he could wish for anything, it would be for the courage to give her another chance.
"No reason for hostility."
"It's none of your business."
"Then why would you ask the question if it wasn't any of my business?" she dropped a file to her desk a bit heavier than she intended; the slap of the papers echoed throughout the room.
"I wasn't saying that the question was none of your business," he voice rose a few decibels, "I was saying that why I asked it was none of your business."
An icy draft swept into the room; silence prevailed. It was like the first frost of winter, both unexpected, and unwanted from the still temperate fall. But what makes that first frost so profound, is the element of surprise that carries it, creeping along the grass in the dead of night.
"What has happened to us?" Booth broke the silence. "We used to bicker, but not like this..." he swung his legs off the couch, dropping his head into his hands. "What happened?"
"We changed..."
If only he had the courage.
If only she had the heart.
"But why?" he asked, honestly not knowing the answer. "I know that I have Hannah but..." he stopped, knowing that he need not say any more. "Has she really made that big of a difference?
"Isn't that what you intended?" Brennan replied hollowly.
'No...well...yes," he struggled to find the words. "But you knew it was going to happen. You knew I had to move on!"
"But I didn't think it would be like this."
"What?" he fumed. "Did you think I wouldn't be able to move on? Did you think that I wouldn't find someone else?"
"To be honest...," she looked down in obvious guilt, "I didn't think that you would, or at least, not as you have. I didn't even conceive that you could find a mate while overseas."
"Why would it matter when I moved on? You knew it would happen eventually. Why did you want me single so badly?"
Brennan shook her head.
"Bones, you can still tell me anything," he took a few steps towards her desk, "We're still friends."
She looked up. For the first time, he noticed the dark circles under her eyes. He looked deeper, noting how her clothing hung just a bit looser than it used to on her already slender figure.
"Are we still friends?"
Her words were like a slap to the face. "H-How could you ever think that?"
"When was the last time we went out for lunch at the diner?"
Booth racked his brain, "Maybe a month or two ago?"
"When did we last go out for post-case drinks?"
"The first case we closed when we got back. We went with Hannah-" he stopped, seeing the disappointment look on her face.
"When did we last eat Thai or Wong Fu's?"
"I don't remember-"
"When did we last take a walk on the mall? When did we last visit Pops? How about the last time I saw Parker?" She rose to her feet. "When did we last have a meaningful, non-work related dialogue?"
"You've made your point," he held a hand up in surrender. "I haven't been a good friend lately. But you've got to understand, it's I compromise I had to make so that Hannah and I could work out."
He had chosen Hannah over her. He had chosen Hannah over her. It didn't surprise her, but it hurt all the same.
Booth watched her face fall into instant despair. "Bones, what do you want from me?"
"I want.."
Perhaps the man behind the curtain (of which no one was paying any attention) was who they needed most. They didn't need to be granted the courage or the ability to change, because it was the wizard who revealed that they already had these things deep within. All it would take to bring these characteristics out was the right conditions, just as energy had the potential to bring out the brilliant hue of hydrogen's emission spectrum.
"I want...you."
The room stood still.
"You want me?" Booth said unsure.
"Yes," Brennan swallowed her doubts. "I desire a monogamous relationship with you. I believe the proper term for my feelings towards you is love."
He couldn't hold back his audible gasp. After he opened up to her and pleaded for her to give "them" a chance. He had almost completely given up hope of ever hearing her say anything like that.
"What took you so long?"
"I wasn't sure whether or not you reciprocated my feelings...I'm still unsure of that..."
"Bones," he stepped behind her desk. "Why would you be unsure?" he said softly.
"You never said that you 'loved' me. You said so, but clarified that it was only in an 'atta-girl' sort of way. You only said that you wanted to give 'us a chance' and you moved on so quickly..."
"I was struggling to move on...I was trying so hard to pretend that I was happy."
Brennan couldn't help but to hang on to some of her doubt; Booth seemed to change his mind awfully fast considering his belief in true love. She had to be sure that his feeling wouldn't be ephemeral.
"But you said you loved her...you told everyone."
"I do love her," he frowned, "I do."
"I knew it," she shoved him roughly away. "You could never have loved me...just leave."
"Bones, look at me," he cupped her face tenderly. "Never think that. I love you for who you are. I don't need you to change; I need you to be Bones, 'cause that's why I love you."
"Is this the point in which we express our affections physically?" her voice became suddenly husky.
"Something like that..." he leaned in.
This was their fourth kiss, but was completely unlike any of the previous. It didn't have the pre-coitus driven element of their first, or the forced nature of their second. Thankfully, it lacked the rejection of the third.
This kiss was short; shorter than either would have preferred.
"I've never cheated on a woman," he brushed a tear away from her cheek, "bug I fell like I've been cheating on you with Hannah all this time. I'm going to talk to her tonight...I think the breakup with be mutual."
"Thank you," Brennan laid her head on his chest.
"It's what I have to do."
"No, not that."
"Then what?"
"For your courage."
"Then thank you for your open heart.
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Tada! That's just what I needed to keep myself going! Next Miles to Go Chapter is in the pipeline!
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