Disclaimer: I do not own Life is Strange
Well, hello to a fandom I've never had the pleasure of writing in before!
I only recently finished Life is Strange (2 weeks ago or so) and I've been reading stories from here since then, and from what I've seen, those of you who write here are easily some of the most talented writers (authors?) that I've seen on this site.
As it stands, I doubt that my writing will hold up to that of the older university students and avid fans that I've seen, but I hope that someone will like it anyway.
For now, for lack of a better word, this will be a pilot chapter of sorts to see what kind of response there is to my writing and whether or not I should continue writing it before I finish my stories from other fandoms. We'll see, but please let me know what you think!
Also, a note to everyone who may be here from my other writing, my language is in keeping with the game, so if you're averse to profanity, I would advise against reading this story.
Chapter 1
Max's POV
Wind. Wind and rain, those were the first sensations Max noticed as she opened her eyes to the all too familiar scene before her. A storm- No, The Storm, was making its way towards land in Arcadia Bay.
Her gaze swept over the landscape, seeing all of the details that she'd seen so many times before. She could see and layout of the town, the beach being hit repeatedly with waves created by the storm. She could see every little thing that she'd seen that first day as she was sitting in Jefferson's class.
She turned around to be met with the sight of the lighthouse standing behind her, but she was alone with the wind and water. There was no one there, but words rang in her ears over the howling wind.
'Make the choice Max.'
'Make it, you have to pick something.'
'Max, you can't let all those people die because of you, you're not that selfish.'
'But what if you are?'
'Could you let that happen? Could you really?'
'What about all of your friends? Do they really deserve this?'
'This is all your fault, but is it worth it?'
'Come on Max, has anything you've done since you got back actually helped anyone?'
'If they die, everything you've done for 'good' was all a lie.'
'Was it?'
'Was anything you did actually for them?'
'Or was it for you?'
Max felt her knees give out as she stared at the Bay's approaching destruction, all because of her.
'Come on Max, hundreds of lives in return for just one. Isn't that more than fair?'
'Are you really so greedy, so selfish, that you would do this?'
The ground that she was kneeling on dug into her through the jeans she was wearing, but she hardly noticed the feeling.
'Max, you don't have much time. Make your choice.'
She felt something in her hand, and looked down to see the picture of the butterfly in her hand.
"No, I… I…" She stuttered to herself, "I tore this up, you can't make me make this choice again… You can't…"
'Is this worth it? Is she worth it?'
"Please don't make me do this again… I can't…"
The wind seemed to pick up, drowning out her own words, even to her own ears as she knelt, intermingling with the voices of people she knew.
'Save us or save her.'
'This is your fault, Max.'
'You killed us.'
'Hundreds for one.'
'You'll never forgive yourself.'
'Make the choice.'
'The choice.'
'The choice.'
'Choose Max.'
'The choice.'
'Choose.'
'Choose.'
Max's face seemed to go numb as she screamed into the storm, but there was no one to hear her.
'Choose.'
'Max.'
'Max.'
'… Max?'
The ground beneath her seemed to deteriorate, and as she fell towards the churning water below her, the voices didn't stop.
'You'll never forgive yourself.'
'Max?!'
'Was it worth it?'
"Max!'
She hit the water.
Max jolted up, panicked and freezing. A cold sweat covered her face, and thin blanket covering her body, though it had been crumped up from turning over and moving in her sleep.
Her hands were clenched into fists, holding the material in her hands so tightly that her knuckles were white. She looked around frantically, trying to remember where she was and what had happened.
She was in a small motel room, not in Arcadia Bay… There was no Arcadia Bay…
Her heart was pounding in her chest as she remembered everything.
"Max? Are you alright?"
Max started at the voice for a moment before she noticed Chloe sitting in the bed beside her, resting a hand on her shoulder. She hadn't even noticed the touch.
"I'm… Yeah, I'm okay…"
Chloe still looked concerned, "More nightmares?"
Max just nodded, dropping her gaze down to where her hands were still clenched into fists around the material of the sheet.
Chloe hesitated for a moment before continuing, "You were… You were muttering in your sleep for a bit, then you started freaking out… Are you sure you're alright?"
Max stayed silent, mulling over her thought. How could she tell Chloe about it? It was childish of her to be this scared of a bad dream, and this wasn't the first time Chloe had been woken up from her outbursts in the night.
"You don't have to talk if you don't want to, I'm just worried…" Chloe said after a few moments of silence.
"Sorry Chloe… You can go back to sleep if you want, I'm going to get some air."
Chloe frowned but didn't argue. She went back to lie down in her own bed as Max quickly put on her jacket and looked at the clock beside the beds.
'4:17'
She opened to door quietly and stepped out into the cold air, shutting the door behind her and folding her arms to keep a bit warmer. The light of the moon was enough to see a bit, but there wasn't much else to light the area. She slowly walked to Chloe's truck and leaned against it, collecting her thoughts.
The moisture from her breath crystalized into small clouds as her breathing calmed, but she hardly noticed the chill biting at her lips, but rather stared at the sky, looking at the moon and the stars.
After Arcadia Bay had been wiped out, she and Chloe and left. It was clear that there was nothing left of the town, and she couldn't bear the thought of being presented with the destruction she'd caused every day, and although the nightmares didn't really give her any reprieve anyway, she'd hoped that getting away might help in that respect.
There hadn't been many words, mostly due to Max's inability to carry a conversation because of the fact that she would nearly shut down any time that something reminded her of her decision, and Chloe didn't know what she could do to help her friend. Max had chosen her over an entire town and watched the destruction unfold before her own eyes, she didn't know how she could possibly relate to that.
During one of the few brief periods of communication that had occurred, Chloe had convinced Max that they should go back to Seattle for the time being, since there was nothing to keep them in Arcadia Bay anymore. She'd joked a bit about Max showing her around the city as Chloe had done for her when she'd returned to Arcadia Bay, but Max had already withdrawn into her thoughts about her decision.
Despite the time she'd had to think, she still didn't know what the fuck she could do anymore. She knew that she couldn't sacrifice Chloe, no matter the cost, but that didn't stop waves of guilt and pain at the thought of her friends in the storm. The damage she'd caused…
Max felt a trail of water running down each side of her face at the memory of the storm… She'd managed to hold it down while she was around Chloe, and she tried to do her best not to show how much pain she was in around the blue haired girl, but she hurt a lot...
Max couldn't help but thinking about what would've happened if she'd just let things run their course in the first place. If she hadn't been able to rewind time, and if Chloe had died before she even knew who she was. Sure it would hurt, but wouldn't that have been less damaging to everyone else? Chloe had said she would die to save the town, but Max couldn't let her go, not after everything… Chloe tried to cover up how she felt for Max's sake, but Max had noticed when her eyes were puffy from crying in private, and the people of Arcadia wouldn't have had to suffer for something that was out of their hands. It was all her fault, all the pain, all the suffering…
The tears continued to run down the brunette's face as she continued down this trail of thought, but she barely noticed as she slid down to the ground, leaned back against the old vehicle. She didn't notice that she'd started shaking, holding in silent sobs. Her right hand started to twitch- a nervous tick she'd developed from her rewinding.
She leaned forward and rested her head in her arms while she let her memories overwhelm her as they seemed to do more often.
Rewinding… What a fucking joke… To be able to play god, to help everyone, only to have it all ripped away and torn to shreds because of it.
A headache had started pounding in her temple at some point, her hand still twitched.
She lifted her hand to her head in a vain attempt to reduce the pain, but she could barely hold her hand steady enough. She couldn't help but worry that she might unintentionally rewind again whenever see lifted her hand, that she might set another disastrous chain of events in motion.
She could feel her breathing starting to pick up again, taking short, rapid breaths, but she didn't care.
The pain she'd caused, the damages, everything she'd ruined by rewinding to fix little problems.
Rewinding couldn't cause any damage, right? Just go back, fix your mistake, keep going.
She could say anything, accidentally offend someone.
Rewind.
Hurt a friend or accidentally let someone's secret slip.
Rewind.
Go somewhere that she didn't belong.
Rewind.
Ask someone about private information.
Rewind.
Try to save someone from pain.
Rewind.
Watch her best friend die over and over because of her mistakes.
Rewind.
Kill an entire town.
Rewind.
Rewind.
Rewind.
Max nearly screamed at the touch on her shoulder, jerking away in a panic at the feeling of a hand by her neck until she recognized the face of worry and concern framed by blue hair.
She closed her eyes, trying to quickly compose herself after getting lost in her thoughts. How long had she even been out here? She could see the horizon beginning to light up.
"Max…" Chloe started, but she didn't seem to know what to say. Max's own face looked down at her knees before her, trying to think up a way to get out of the situation. Chloe knew she was hurting, had been woken up by her nightmares before, but she'd never seen one of these meltdowns before.
"Max, please come back inside, you're shaking."
Max stayed silent for a moment, and nodded without looking back up. She felt numb, but could sense a few feelings as Chloe slowly helped her back to her feet and led her back inside the room where she'd woken up in a panic before. It was warmer, but she hardly noticed.
Chloe sat her down on the edge of her bed before kneeling down in front of Max and looking into her eyes, but Max looked away.
"Max, I'm really worried about you… You've been so quiet for these last few days, and… and when I wake up in the night, you say names, you cry, you beg for something, but you never say what, and now you go outside in the cold and when I come to check on you, you're shaking and sobbing on the ground." Chloe hesitated, as if she wasn't sure what she wanted to say next, "Max, please, I need you to let me help you…"
Max stayed silent for a few more moments before lifting her hand to wipe the tears that were still on her face from outside.
"I just… Chloe, I've fucked this up so much…" Max said through shaky breaths, "I tried so hard to help everyone I could, I did everything I could possibly manage to keep everyone safe, to keep you safe, and I've ruined everything."
"Max, you can't blame yourself for that. It wasn't fair to have a choice like that."
"But it was my fucking fault!" Max nearly yelled back, "Fucking with time isn't normal, what the hell else should I have expected! Everything I touch breaks, and I everyone I care about gets hurt because of me!"
She took a sharp, shaky breath to try to continue, but started shaking and hid her face in her arms instead.
"I'm so sorry Chloe, you don't deserve this mess, and you don't deserve me, I've fucked up so much…"
Chloe leaned forward and took the smaller girl in her arms, hugging her and gently rubbing her back. She'd never been good at comforting people, so she opted to stay silent.
The shaking stopped after a while, and Max fell into a restless sleep in Chloe's arms shortly after.
The blue haired girl didn't want to risk waking Max, so she stayed there, holding Max as she slept. The occasional whimper or quiet cry escaped Max's mouth, but the shaking didn't come back. After a few hours, Chloe slowly laid Max down into the bed. She looked at the brunette as she slept. She blamed herself for so much…
Chloe gently brushed some of Max's hair out of her face as she slept, wondering if she would ever stop blaming herself for what had happened.
Chloe sighed before lying down beside the brunette in case she was woken by another nightmare and closed her eyes to try to get a few hours of sleep.
I'd love any input that I could get from anyone who made it through my fucking terrible writing, especially since I'll need it to judge whether this is something I should continue soon. Still, I hope you enjoyed!