Chapter One

Dean sighed deeply, closing the door of his dusty motel room behind him. He leaned against the door, taking in a deep breath. His body was a bit sore from a beat down. He was trying not to think about the situation he had with Sam a few hours ago. He got into a massive fight with his brother and he left the bunker, more like got kicked out. He couldn't look at Sam, he didn't want to even talk to Sam, either. Now, he was planning to hole up in the cheap motel for a few days, let the guilt eat him up and then do whatever afterwards. Maybe he'd fuck get laid, hunt with Castiel, he didn't exactly know yet.

Flashback

Dean walked around the corner toward the kitchen, pausing when he saw Sam. His little brother was standing there at the counter, looking down at a small glass. There was a liquid in it, a thick deep red. At first, Dean thought it was tomato juice soon to figure out he was wrong. It a blood and the only blood Sam has ever decided to down was demon blood. Anger and betrayal rushed over Dean as he stormed into the kitchen. Sam, was taken by surprise, caught off guard and he tried to take the glass, hide it but Dean already saw. He snatched it up and like he predicted, it was blood.

"What the hell, Dean?" Sam yells, and Dean shoots him an icy glare. He understands that they're going through a rough time but downing demon blood wasn't going to be a smart choice.

"What the fuck is this? Demon blood?" Dean demands, slamming the glass down onto the counter. The blood splashes out over the rim of the glass, pooling at the bottom of the cup on the table. Sam balls his hands up into fists, giving Dean a cold stare. Dean wasn't having his bullshit though, he knows that Sam hates him drinking demon blood.

"Yes, it is." Sam retorts and Dean shakes his head. He scratches the back of his neck where his hair begins to grow out.

"You were going to fucking drink this? BEHIND MY DAMN BACK?" Dean raises his voice, now yelling at his brother. Sam however, didn't feel pity for some reason. In fact, Sam didn't even care. He didn't care that Dean was pissed off at him for planning to drink the blood. He didn't move, he didn't budge, he just stood there, giving Dean the same cold look he gave him when Dean first entered the kitchen.

"Yeah, because I knew you would retaliate like this." Sam replies, like it was going to make it all better.

"You were going to fucking LIE to me? Wow, Sammy. This is a whole new thing for you. Did you think you could keep this from me?" Dean hisses, throwing his arms up in frustration. Sam just shrugs, not replying to what Dean had asked. He had nothing to say to his brother, for he felt like like he was overreacting like a little high school girl. Dean glared at his brother, "Of course you didn't. You don't seem to care about anyone but Gabriel and your damn self" Dean begins to turn around but his words hit Sam like a brick. Sam didn't like the way Dean had mentioned Gabriel in this but then, Gabriel didn't know about this demon blood idea either.

"Don't fucking talk about Gabriel." Sam snaps, grabbing Dean's arm. Dean retaliates, shoving Sam away. He was pissed off at his little brother, but mainly hurt. He was covering up the immense burn of betrayal with anger and rage because it was easier that way, or so he believed. Inside, Dean just wanted to cry, feeling abandoned, hurt, betrayed, guilty, and hated. Abandoned and betrayed because his brother lied to him, hurt because his brother was going to go behind his back and guilty for not being a good enough brother. Sam however, didn't care about Dean's feelings at the moment. Out of annoyance and surprise from Dean's shove, Sam punched Dean right in the side of his face.

Dean fell to the floor, his head ringing from Sam's right hook. He tries to get up but Sam's foot sinks into the flesh in his stomach as he flips Dean over with a strong kick. Dean groans, holstering himself up with his elbows just to be punched in the face. Twice, three times, four. Dean felt his brother grab the collar of his jacket as Sam slammed him into the wall, their face just inches apart. He could feel the heat of rage emitting from Sam as he was breathing hard. Dean spit blood out on the floor behind Sam, glaring into his brother's eyes.

"Don't fucking talk about Gabriel like that. He doesn't know and if you tell him, I'll fucking kill you. I want you out of the bunker in an hour, pack all of your shit and leave." Sam threatened Dean, spatting in his face. He let Dean go and began walking out of the kitchen in a hasty pace, rage boiling within him. Dean touched the cut on his lip gingerly but it still stung. He wiped off the blood lightly and walked into his room, packing his stuff. He couldn't stick around and look at Sam, especially with the way Sam was acting and planning on going behind Dean's back. He thought, Well fuck it. If you wan't me to go then I'll go.

Reality

Dean had finished packing everything in forty - five minutes and left. Drove for about five hours and was now here, in this cheap motel where he was going to stay for about a week. Dean dropped his bag of clothes and his duffel bag of weapons by the couch, closed the curtains with a swift movement and yanked his jacket off, hanging it one of the chairs around the table. He placed the beers he bought before checking in into the fridge, the pie as well and he left his snacks out on the counter. Dean walked into the bathroom to splash cold water on his face, looking at himself in the musty mirror afterwards.

Dean decided he was going to take a shower and then drink the beers he bought. He started the hot water, stripped off of his clothes and shut the door of the bathroom, turning on the fan which rattled but he just ignored the annoying noise. He got into the shower and stood as the searing hot water ran down his body, ignoring the slight pain from his body because of the water temperature. Dean ran his fingers through his hair, closing his eyes as his mind rushed and circled with all of these feelings and thoughts.

Dean wasn't one to cry over feelings like this. Yeah, he hurt because he is human but normally, he would just drink his problems away. Tonight? He didn't know what was going on but before he knew, there was tears streaming down his face as he sobbed in the shower, knowing he was alone, or so he thought. He was too busy crying to hear the flutter of wings as Castiel had just appeared.

"Dean?" Castiel's familiar voice interrupts. He could see the outline of Dean's body through the curtains and he shifted his eyes away, focusing on the sink to prevent staring. Dean nearly jumped and quickly straightened himself up, hoping Castiel didn't notice but he had a feeling he did. Dean pulled the shower curtain a bit, only popping his head out.

"Damn it, Cas. What do you want now? I'm kind of busy." Dean demanded, a bit embarrassed and also feeling annoyed that Castiel just popped up out of the blue. He didn't call for him so whatever Castiel had to say better be important.

"Yeah um, I can tell. Are you... okay?" Castiel says, his blue vibrant eyes looking up meet Dean's green eyes.

"I'm fine, Cas. What the hell do you want?" Dean insists, bluntly but Castiel knew he wasn't "fine".

"Um, you called for me?"

Dean's eyebrows furrowed together as he raised them at the same time. He looked at the wall and then back at Castiel, who just stood there in his tan trench coat, his black suit with the dress shirt unbuttoned at the top button and his tie loose, sloppy. "No... I didn't?"

"Well, you didn't exactly call my name, Dean but I heard you... from your mind." Castiel replies, looking at him carefully. "Are you sure you're okay?" Castiel asks again, knowing the answer. He heard Dean crying and he had guesses it was probably because of Sam but he just wanted to make sure. Dean however, wasn't every happy with Castiel pressing into the subject. He didn't want to cry at all, especially in front of Castiel because if he talked about it, he knew he would break down.

"I'm fine, Cas. Just go."

"That's not what it sounded like when I came in, Dean-"

"Cas, just leave. Now." Dean hisses angrily. Sam sighed in frustration and hurt, looking up at the ceiling. Dean popped his head back into the shower as he saw a glimpse of Castiel's wings through the curtain. Curiosity washed over him as he wondered what Castiel's wings looked like, felt like. He knew Castiel would never show him though, even if he asked. Wings are like dicks, they are private. Only brothers and sisters can see them, that's it. Their only seen if you share a strong, affectionate sexual love like bond with the angel. Dean didn't have that but he still wanted to see Castiel's wings. Seconds later, he heard the feathers fluff away as Castiel had disappeared. Dean sighed, feeling hurt. He didn't want Castiel to leave, he didn't want to be alone. He was hurt and he just wanted somebody to hold him but he was also afraid. Dean didn't want to break down in front of anyone, he had to be strong, rough, powerful. He is Dean fucking Winchester, he doesn't cry easily, especially not over a fight with Sam, or so he tells himself every time a disagreement of some sort does take place.

Castiel, who knew Dean didn't want to be alone, just flied out into the motel room. He made it seem like he had disappeared but he didn't. He couldn't leave Dean, no, not as Dean was breaking down when he appeared. Not when he knew Dean was hurt and was going to need somebody. He knew how Dean was when he was this way, he drank a lot till he blacked or he didn't sleep at all. Besides, Castiel cared about him on a much deeper level.

He originally came to tell Dean how he felt but when he heard Dean crying, he changed his mind. To find a reason to tell Dean why he showed up, he just said that Dean was calling for him, which wasn't a lie. Dean was calling for him, in the back of his mind where nobody ever really goes. There's always a spot in somebody's head where they say something or think something and they don't notice it, they don't process it. In that part of Dean's head, he was calling for Castiel. He needed his best friend, his brother. He needed somebody because he didn't want to be alone.

Castiel heard the shower stop as he sat down on one of the chairs, staring at the bathroom door. Dean got out of the bathtub, quickly and sloppily drying his body off. Dean realized he didn't bring anything other than the towel with him into the bathroom, not that he cared. He was alone so he could just walk out of the bathroom butt naked, or so he thought. He did exactly that though, walked straight out of the bathroom with the only towel hanging around his neck. He saw Castiel sitting in the chair moments later, staring right at him. Dean's face began to turn red and Castiel noticed it but he didn't look away.

"Shit, Cas. I thought I fucking told you to leave?" Dean snaps in embarrassment, quickly wrapping the white towel around his waist. Castiel didn't say anything yet, he just studied Dean. His hot muscular well fit body, his beautiful skin tone, which looked really soft. The anti possession tattoo on his great looking chest with water droplets sticking all over him, running down his body. His well shown V line and the water in his hair, glistening, shimmering because of the light. Cas thought of touching him, realizing he was getting a small boner from imagining this, he snapped out of his short trance.

"You did, but I um... I heard your thoughts. Are you sure you're okay?" Castiel asks as Dean walks into the bathroom with the clothing he had grabbed. He shuts the door and changes quickly, just walking out with a pair of grey sweatpants on. He could still see Dean's upper body, which he didn't mind but looking at it drove him a bit crazy.

"What do you mean you heard my damn thoughts? Why do you even listen to them?" Dean asks, feeling a bit violated but also curious.

"Well, I hear or see everyone's thoughts. I mainly hear yours though, sometimes seeing them but I can also hear others if I wanted to. All I have to do is focus on that person." Castiel quickly speaks, without thinking. Dean raises an eyebrow, getting a beer out of the fridge and opening it, throwing the cap on the counter behind him carelessly.

"So why do the hell you focus on me?" Dean narrows his green eyes, looking at Castiel piercingly. Castiel just realized what he had said and heat of embarrassment rushes over him.

"No, Dean I-" Castiel pauses, closing his mouth. He didn't know what to say to fix the situation, mainly because there was nothing he could say to get rid of the awkwardness that he had released into the room. Castiel looked at Dean with his blue eye, forgetting everything as Dean lifted the beer bottle to his lips. Castiel thought of running his hands down Dean's side, feeling every inch of his body, kissing hit. He thought of kissing Dean's perfectly soft lips, getting lost in thought. All the things Castiel wanted to do, he didn't realize he was arousing himself but Dean on the other hand, realized a lump in Castiel's pants.

"Um, Cas?" Dean says, attempting to get his attention. Castiel however, didn't seem to hear him. He was in a trance. "Hey, Cas." Still no reply "Castiel." Dean spoke again, more vivid and louder. Castiel blinked a few times and straightened up, looking at Dean, who was trying to give him a normal look back. He felt his pants become tighter as he realized he had a boner. Cas tried to casually cover it up with his trench coat, thinking Dean wouldn't notice but, he was too late. Dean already saw the boner and he wondered what Castiel was thinking about and why he was aroused.

"Sorry." he mumbles and Dean shakes his head, "What were we talking about again?"

"Uh, why do you focus on my thoughts?"

"We'll talk about -" Castiel pauses, me later... What's going on?" Castiel quickly changes the subject.

"I'm fine, Cas. Nothing is going on." Dean huffs in annoyance. Castiel kept pressing on the subject and Dean didn't want to talk about it. He knew Castiel only wanted to help because he cared but Dean didn't budge. To his surprise, Castiel wasn't taking Dean's bullshit answer.

"Dean, you are not fine. Stop lying to me and yourself. I have always been here, watching you your entire life. You only met me years ago when I pulled your ass from hell but, I have always been watching over you since your first breath. I know when you're lying and you're doing that right now. I understand you think you have to be strong for Sam well, Sam isn't here. I am. You don't have to be strong in front of me because I've seen you crying at your worst." Dean winces when Castiel mentions Sam but what hurts more is what Castiel said. He had been there through it all and he knew Dean wasn't doing okay. Castiel's voice wasn't gentle but it wasn't angry either, just frustrated and a tad bit upset. His dark blue diamond eyes bore into Dean.

"Cas-" Dean's soft quiet voice chokes a bit, breaking. Castiel gets up and walks toward him, taking the beer out of his hand and putting it on the counter behind Dean. He grabs Dean by the shoulder and pulls him in, wrapping his arms around Dean's neck, embracing him. Dean wraps his arms around Castiel's back lightly, interlocking them as he burrows his face into where Castiel's neck met his shoulders. He began to cry, sobs racking his body. Castiel didn't say anything though, he just hugged Dean, lightly rubbing his warm soft back with his fingertips.

Castiel knew Dean was hurt, he knew Dean was broken. Dean liked to add layers and layers of high walls to lock up his feelings but Castiel knew. He felt abandoned, rejected, betrayed, guilty, and hurt. Dean has been through a shit ton, losing his mother, father, Jo, Ellen, and Bobby but fight's with Sam were always the worst. Dean liked to cover up how he felt after arguments but he wasn't fooling Castiel. Those got to him the most, broke him the most. Dean knew it too, just hated to admit it.

Castiel didn't know how long they stood there that night. Dean had stopped crying but he didn't let go, he just stayed in the same position and Castiel didn't pull away either. He didn't understand why Dean decided not to let go after he quit crying but Cas didn't say anything about it. He didn't mind hugging Dean, especially with his upper body bare. Dean was warm and smelled amazing. Castiel would do anything just to be up close like this, able to smell Dean.

"I'm sorry..." Dean mumbles into Castiel's neck, his warm breath hitting it.

"Sorry for what?" Castiel replies quietly, confused.

"For being a... a fucking mess." Dean replies, hesitating. He didn't know if he wanted to tell Cas how he felt about being a mess. He was afraid to open up because he didn't want to be left by Castiel, he didn't want anyone to see him in this state but he already broke that promise to himself. He just finished crying into Castiel's shoulder and Cas didn't say anything about it or move, he just soothed him. He just held him, which is what Dean needed, even though he wouldn't confess that to himself or anyone else.

"You don't need to apologize for crying, Dean. Everyone has emotions, even you. You're human, you hurt. It happens." Castiel replies, assuring Dean who nods slowly. They stand there for a few more minutes until Dean tells Cas he is going to bed, ordering the angel away. Obeying, Cas flies out but watches him closely. Once he was sure Dean was sound asleep, he appeared again, sitting in the chair watching Dean.

He was sleeping peacefully on his back, chest rising and falling calmly as he breathed. His head was resting on one of his arms as the other was lightly sitting on his stomach, rising and falling as it did. Castiel decided he was going to stay, mainly because he didn't exactly want to leave Dean alone. Cas closed his eyes, deciding he was going to sleep. he wasn't tired and he didn't need sleep but he closed his eyes, knowing it'll pass time quicker.

Just as Castiel was falling asleep, he heard Dean groan. It wasn't a groan of pain but pleasure, which sounded so hot with Dean's low voice. Castiel felt himself becoming hard when he heard it as wonder washed over him. He wanted to know what Dean was dreaming about, hearing Dean just groan in pleasure like that. Castiel decided not to invade his privacy though, afraid that he might see some girl which made him jealous. He was in love with Dean, has been since he saw Dean give his soul for Sam but he didn't exactly notice it till a few months back. He didn't mention it though, not knowing if Dean felt the same way. Cas decided to try to sleep again when he heard Dean once more, this time louder and clearer.

"Fuck. Cas-" his eyes popped open, seeing that Dean was still asleep yet he groaned his name. Castiel instantly became aroused, cock throbbing from his voice. He looked at Dean, who was obviously dreaming, about him and noticed he also had a bulge in his pants. Castiel looked into Dean's head, seeing what he was dreaming and instantly kicked himself out. He thought of his choices, whether to wake up Dean or leave because he didn't want to lose his self control. Cas didn't like any of his decisions he came up with because if he woke Dean up, how was he going to explain why he was there, or turned on. He couldn't say Dean called for him because that would mean he saw his dream and he just wanted to keep that to himself. If he left, he would feel bad, even though Dean didn't exactly want him watching over him as he slept.

Castiel finally made a decision as he walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind him softly. Listening closely, Dean wasn't awake. Castiel splashed some cold water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror, thinking about what to do with his throbbing hard cock, which was begging to be touched. Giving in, Cas unzipped his pants and let both that and his boxers fall on the floor, touching his length.

He began jerking up and down, masturbating to get rid of the arousal. He started off slow and gentle but began speeding up and squeezing afterwards. Cas bit his bottom lip hard, stifling the loud moans to prevent waking Dean. It would be awkward if Dean woke up to the sound of Castiel pleasuring himself in the bathroom of his motel while he slept. "Fuck" he murmured, breathlessly.

Dean's dream came to an end when he was done moaning in pleasure from an orgasm. He woke up, rubbing his eyes and checked the clock, reading 2:38 AM. He lied back down, seeing light come from his motel bathroom. Didn't I turn the damn light off? Dean thought to himself until he heard something that sounded like groaning and not the painful or tired type, the pleasure filled type. Dean sat up, peeking through the cracks of the door wondering who it was. He pulled back quickly when the person in the bathroom masturbating was who he had guessed, Castiel.

Dean realized he was hard, mind flashing back to the dream he had. Him and Cas were together, having sex, rough sex. Fucking, on the bed. It was some damn amazing fucking too, the kind of fucking he craved. Then, Dean wondered if he was making noise or if Castiel saw the dream and then got a boner, which kind of embarrassed him. He lied on his side, trying to get comfortable with the raging boner as he listened to Castiel, which wasn't exactly helping him at all. He realized Cas was groaning his name, Dean, and that just made him harder. He wondered what was flashing through the angel's mind.

Giving in, Dean stuck his hand into his pants, rubbing his dick gingerly. He grabbed lotion he had and squirted it into his hands, using it as lube. He started off slow and began picking up his pace, moaning in pleasure. Castiel had already came and finished cleaning himself up and he heard Dean. Shock filled over him, realizing he was awake and he began hoping that Dean hadn't heard him. Castiel took a look into Dean's mind and realized he did hear Cas but he was also pleasuring himself to the sight of naked Cas in his head. Castiel began to think Dean felt the same way as he pulled his pants back up, tucking his shirt in. He grabbed the bathroom doorknob and began to turn it, clicking it open and walked out into the room.

I know guys, I'm fucking evil. I stopped right there, on a cliff hanger. Don't worry though because Chapter 2 will come out in a few days, I promise. Yeah, there is going to be Destiel and it's going to be... hot. I hoped you enjoyed the first chapter and don't forget to write a review! I'm always open to opinions on my writing :)

I do not own any of the characters. They belong to Supernatural.