Ba Sing Se
Late Summer, 174 AG
Dear Mako,
Well, I have to say, at least I went back to Ba Sing Se in better form than when I left. Leaving, the Dai Li threw my fifteen-year-old self into an airship and there was all kinds of excitement, what with the people rioting and trying to kill me and the Queen laying on the floor with her eyes and tongue sticking out. Well, the part where the three Dai Li were killed in front of me was not really all that exciting. That part was more terrifying. Also, you can't get brain matter out of silk, I don't care what they say.
Coming back in, well, now I'm nineteen and probably no smarter, although at least I've traveled a little. The day the Queen died was the first time I had ever left the Upper Ring, did I ever tell you that? I don't remember. Do you want to hear something funny? The Dai Li took me to the Four Elements in Republic City and all I wanted to do was wash all of the blood off but I didn't even know how to operate the shower. I had never done it before! I just stood there in the bathroom and stared at the shower hoping that either someone would come in or I could make it go with the sheer force of my will or something? I don't know! We had people to do those things for us at the Palace, you have to understand. So as useless as everyone here seems to think I am, at least I can run my own bath now. You see? I can learn.
There's nothing left of the palace but bones. It's all gone. The art, the statues, the furniture, everything. They even killed the umpty-ump-year-old koi in the fishpond in the Conservatory, and I wish they hadn't done that. They were the only animals allowed in the palace - the Queen hated animals, but even she wasn't willing to eat the sacred koi - so they were the only pets I had. I named them all and snuck them bits of dumplings sometimes. I am genuinely sorry about the koi. I don't really care so much about all of the rest - I have money galore, you know, for some reason people think the net worth of royalty is tied up into jewels and such, but it's all about the real estate, let me assure you. That's not even to mention that my mother's family was scandalously rich due to some extremely lucrative shipping and trade contracts that are my legacy from her and I've inherited even more due to some untimely and/or heinous deaths on that side recently so let's hear it for the Red Lotus! And also the Great Uniter! Because who needs family when you personally own some of the best real estate in the Earth Kingdom? Right?
I had this (very stupid wild) hope that my mother's portrait would still be there. It wasn't, of course. She died when I was born so I never knew her, but I used to stare up at the portrait (it hung in my bedroom) and imagine what she was like. (She was beautiful and very fond of hugging me and let me have as many pets as I wanted and always let me have dessert. No one ever touched me as a child, it's Simply Not The Thing You Do with a royal prince, and hugging yourself really doesn't fill the gap, let me tell you.) Spirits know my father never wanted anything to do with me, he died when I was five and I hardly ever saw him. I do remember him once telling me that I was small and ugly, now there's a memory of paternal love and devotion to treasure.
Well! This is not very cheerful, is it? Sorry. I really hate Ba Sing Se. And love it. But mostly I hate it.
So, what else? Oh! The Kyoshi Warriors who have charge of me now are terrifyingly efficient and there are always two of them with me. They switch off and on, you see, there are five of them total. They don't actually speak to me, which is just as well, I am frightened out of my wits by them. I wonder what they look like without all of the makeup? Besides looking like they want to take my head off at any given minute, that is. I can't actually stay at the Palace, mind you - it's cavernous and in pieces and security there is impossible - so they have put me up in an Upper Ring house that Lord Moon Peaches (or whatever his name was, they told me, but I have already forgotten it) HAPPILY gave up to me. (That's what they told me, anyhow, that he HAPPILY gave it up. I am not sure if this is true as I have yet to meet Lord Moon Peaches, but where is he living now, I wonder?) Everything smells of sandalwood and fish oil. The house, I mean. Not me. It is not, may I say, a very pleasant combination. I don't dare complain, though, as I am afraid that one of my new bodyguards will garrote me with her fan if I do.
Your grandmother packed me a going-away bag of sticky dumplings and I made everyone get out of the bathroom - it's the only place where I can have any privacy whatsoever, and I had to put my foot down over it - and I turned on the shower so no one could hear anything (good job, Wu! Turning on showers and everything!) and sat on the floor and ate them and had a small session of waterworks. Wu down! Never tell. Kings don't cry.
Tomorrow I have to meet with the regional governors. Some of them loved Kuvira and want her back and some hated her and are glad she is gone and some are happy that I am abdicating and some are most certainly NOT glad about it and I already know that no matter what I do or say, no one will like it. I should be more like the Queen was, frankly she never gave a damn about anyone but herself and if you did something she didn't like, well, that's what she had the Dai Li for. Don't like me abdicating? Think Kuvira was all that? DAI LI! TAKE CARE OF IT WITH YOUR BIG ROCK FISTS!
(Which reminds me, when you and your brother were in prison in Ba Sing Se I was there too! Well, not in the prison, but in the Palace. In my dreams I came to your glorious rescue, but of course I would have never been allowed anywhere near the prison. Ah well. A boy can dream.)
I hope your hand feels better. I hope you are happier getting back to your real job. Please write me back. Please.
-Wu