Your name is Dave Strider and my god sleep should be your bitch right now. All night long sleep has resisted the urge to let you engulf yourself in its arms. This just happened to be one of those nights when you are just so tired but you just can't sleep. Aren't those nights the best of them all? Even with the background lull of the rain outside.
"Ugh…maybe Johns awake." You quietly asked yourself. John Egbert: your best bro in the whole entire universe, period. And you totally do not have the most homosexual crush on him, ever. Nope!
You pull up pesterchum ever-so-casually to see that you had missed various messages from the one and only John Egbert
EctoBiologist began Pestering TurntechGodhead at 1:43
EB: dave.
EB: dave.
EB: daaaavee
EB: dave dave dave dave dave.
EB: dddaaaaaavvvvvveeeeeeee
TG: whats up egbert
EB: im bored :B
TG: and what am i supposed to do about that
EB: ummmmm i don't know.
EB: you can tell me a story
TG: ugh okay
TG: i will tell you the most heartwarming and the most touching story you will ever hear
EB: even better than con air?
TG: oh hell of a lot better than that shitty ass movie
EB: con air is not shitty! it is the most beautiful movie ever
EB: no questions asked.
TG: whatever
TG: so now for a story
EB: sweet
TG: so once there was this boy
TG: he was so tired but he just couldnt sleep
TG: so he contacted his best bro to tell him he cant sleep
TG: and eventually the boy stayed up all night long
TG: the fucking end
TG: happy now egbert
TG: egbert
TG: john?
EctoBiologist ceased pestering TurntechGodhead at 2:26
Fuck, John left. Now what should you do while you attempt to fall asleep. After about 10 minutes of the ever-going war in your head of who is the World's best well known rapper is. You say well known because obviously you are the best rapper ever but alas no one seems to recognize your amazing talent of well amazing-ness.
Your war is interrupted by a knock on your door. Bro is asleep so you doubt that it's anyone for him. So you decided to answer it yourself.
"Ugh, who the fuck comes to the Strider household at 2:40 in the morning," You grumble under your breath.
You open the door to see a pair of deep blue eyes looking up into your hidden red ones. His face lit up when he saw you.
"Um, hi Egbert," You say not quite knowing what else to say. John seems to be soaking wet from the rain outside.
John's eyes lock with yours, then they slowly drift down to your shirt and then even lower to your stupid record designed boxers. He stared and seemed to be a bit speechless. A few seconds pass until he speaks up. "Hi Dave," he smiles, "Um…so I heard you couldn't sleep? Nice boxers by the way." John says with a giggle that totally was not the cutest thing you had ever fucking heard. Dammit Egbert.