"Look don't fob me off." Ethan spoke as he approached his older brother who was getting increasingly annoyed at a stapler opting for a paper clip instead.
Cal laughed a little. "Only you would use a word like 'fob'."
Cal walked away from his brother to the other side of the nurse's station.
"Cal, I was there, I saw what Taylor did to you." Ethan spoke as he followed his brother and stood alongside him trying to keep his brother's attention. "So, unfortunately, I'm probably the only person who can help you with this."
Cal closed the file he had been trying to look through and looked at Ethan, he was starting to get irritated by his brother's constant fight to get him to open up.
"Who needs help? Ethan, I'm fine, all right?" He spoke moving away once again.
"No, you're not, you're so far from fine that you're coming back round the other side…" Ethan followed him and stood at the opposite side of the desk face to face with his brother.
"Listen…" Cal started only to be interrupted.
"No, no, you listen. Just accept that you're not always superman." Ethan spoke, he'd finally got his attention. "Yeah, and that some days you're Clark Kent and there's nothing you can do about it. Trust me, I know all about that."
Cal sighed and diverted his eye line downwards, he didn't really know what to say to that. Thankfully he didn't have to say anything as Robyn came and Ethan had to rush off. Cal hadn't really listened to what had been said, he was in his own world.
He watched them walk away as he remained in the same place before he went off to do a final check on his patient. Once done he headed to the on call room where he had been staying recently with the few things he owned stacked in 3 cardboard boxes in the corner. He sat on the bed and sighed to himself.
Ethan was right, he knew him too well and knew how he dealt with difficult things in his life. Shut them out, pretend they're not happening, don't show that you're hurting and eventually it will disappear. He had loved Taylor, she had manipulated him. She was a good actor he had to give her that much. She had him convinced that they were made for each other and she was the only one for him and vice versa. He had finally believed that his life was complete and he could be happy again with his own family. To have all of that ripped away from him and to be told outright that he was used for money hurt him more than ever before.
He blinked a little noticing that his eyes had been slowly filling up as he thought about her. He felt as though he should be embarrassed, crying over a con artist but he knew that he was just being human. Reacting anyway a normal man would after what he had been through.
After pulling himself together he went back out into the department. He saw Ethan back at the nurse's station once again, looking through some papers. He stood beside him but didn't speak at first, they often had moments like that. Where each other's presence was enough to say what they wanted to say and provide the comfort they are looking for.
"The best thing about Superman is Clark Kent." Cal eventually spoke, it was easier to communicate to each other through riddle and metaphors than to just talk bluntly.
Ethan smiled a little knowing what he meant and looked at him. "Really?"
Cal avoided eye contact. "Yeah, it's the only chance he gets to be human, so…"
Ethan smiled, Cal knew he didn't have to say anything more Ethan had understood exactly what he meant. He was hurting and he was vulnerable and to be quite honest he didn't know how to deal with it.
"Look, you should move back in." Ethan told him. He had lost enough because of Taylor without somewhere he called home too.
Cal shook his head, he knew that this had been hard on Ethan too.
"No… I wouldn't want to put that on you again." Cal declined. "No, Ethan..."
"You're coming back. I insist." Ethan told him with a small smile and Cal nodded before Ethan walked away.
Cal couldn't deny the fact he was relieved. He missed living with his brother, he missed being subtly looked after by him. But he had done so much to hurt Ethan and didn't really understand why he would want him back.
For Ethan, the truth was he also missed Cal. He knew his brother was always going to annoy him but he also knew that he was family and at the end of the day he loved him. It was very clear to him that Cal was still upset. It had barely been 24 hours since it had all happened and he hadn't been himself all day. He had heard him saying something to Lofty about women having hearts, Cal had passed it off as a joke once he knew Ethan was in hearing range but Ethan knew from Cal's tone that is had been far from it. Having gone through many of Cal's jokes he knew that this was his way of getting it out of his system.
The shift came to an end and Cal was in the staffroom once again, dressed ready to go. Ethan also came in after getting changed and smiled at his older brother.
"Pizza and a few bottles tonight?" He offered and smiled as Cal nodded in response.
He still wasn't himself, they both knew it but all Cal needed was to know that Ethan no longer blamed him, the anger he had previously felt had diminished and he understood that Cal hadn't done what he did to hurt him or be malicious.
Ethan drove them both back to his, he had been glancing over at Cal every so often. He looked exhausted, emotionally and physically drained. Once they pulled up they both climbed out and Ethan helped him carry his things into the flat.
"Menus are in the normal place." Ethan told him. "I'll get us a drink."
Cal nodded and grabbed out a menu, he didn't really have much of an appetite but ordered their normal anyway then gratefully accepted a drink off Ethan which he had nearly downed the next minute.
"I needed that." Cal smiled and relaxed into the sofa.
"So I see." Ethan laughed slightly.
"What changed your mind then?" Cal asked turning his head so he was looking at Ethan. "I mean, me living here."
Ethan shrugged. "You're my brother Cal, like I told you last night I'll always come back for you."
Cal give a small laugh and nodded a little.
"And, there was this patient today. He had Tamponade, I had to do a Pericardiocentesis." He looked at Cal who nodded understandingly. "It was quite scary, even more so when I think it wasn't that long ago you were doing that on me blind without the scanner. You saved my life that day."
"That doesn't mean you have to always repay me Ethan…" Cal shook his head.
"No, no I know that. It just put things into perspective for me I guess. Money is just money at the end of the day." Ethan smiled.
"It wasn't just money though was it?" Cal shook his head and looked straight ahead at the wall. "It was Mum's money, and then it was Mum's ring."
"You didn't sacrifice the ring though Cal, you gave it back and apologised." Ethan told him. "And the money whether, Mum's or not, in the grand scheme of things was nothing."
"I just wanted to be happy again, I though giving her the money would mean she was mine for life. Should have known someone like me wouldn't be able to find someone to settle down with." Cal sighed and picked up another bottle before downing that one too.
"Hey slow down." Ethan told him and moved the fresh bottle away as Cal went to go for a third. "You will find someone to settle down with it just takes time."
"I'm a player Ethan, everyone knows what I'm like. Hell Lofty even came to me today and said that a patient was hot as an incentive for me to go and treat her quicker." Cal told him. "What does that say about me ey?"
"You have your ways Cal that's just you. You present yourself as this man who doesn't have feelings for anyone and just doesn't care what people think, you treat women like objects to make yourself look untouchable." Ethan told him. "I know that that isn't the real you, probably more than you realise."
Cal rested his head back and closed his eyes. "It's how it's always been."
"Chances are it's not going to change anytime soon. There will be more women coming in and out of your life. We know that. But we'll keep picking up the pieces because that is what we do. It's what we've always done." Ethan told him.
"It's what you've always done." Cal corrected him. "You've done it since you were a kid. I remember you as a 10 year old cleaning the cuts on my face after one of Dad's moods."
Ethan nodded and looked down a little at the thought of his Dad.
"Putting me to bed when I was about 14 after getting drunk in the bathroom until a ridiculous hour." He continued.
"That wasn't just me picking up the pieces though..." Ethan stopped him.
"How is it not?" Cal frowned.
"Because the reason you had cuts and bruises was because you'd got in between Dad and either me or Mum. The drinking was your way of coping with living in that house and to be honest me looking after you was my way of coping." Ethan was talking quietly now.
"But we coped, we're both good doctors. A bit missed up and a bit rough around the edges but overall decent people." Cal had now became the voice of reason. He knew home life was a tough subject for Ethan, he had always wanted a normal family, whatever that was.
"It's just how we are I guess. No changing that now." He looked up to Cal.
"Honestly? I wouldn't change a thing." Cal smiled.
Ok so a bit cheesy but after last night's episode (which I watched at 2am due to a party at my halls) I had to write something.
I have had a request to write a fic based on Cal and Ethan when they are younger with Ethan angst and caring Cal. Anyone have any ideas what I can include in that as I have been thinking but nothing good is coming to mind.
There has been a dip is Ethan & Cal fics, there are some good ones but they are mostly just thoughts and feelings no actual stories so come on guys we need to get back into the swing of things!
Let me know what you guys think of this and I will be back with more soon (probably next time an episode inspires me).
Much love J x