Just something I wrote when I was bored. Not that great but whatever.
I want to get to know you better
"I don't know Iggy." Fang glanced at him. "Doesn't that sound kind of…chickish?"
"Yeah, a little, but it'll make Max think that you're sensitive. And you know how bitchy she's been recently?"
"She is not being…yeah, okay. You're right. Continue."
"Anyways, tell her that you've noticed her change in attitude and that you want to know what's wrong."
"Iggy, I don't think-"
"Trust me, if you're not getting some after that, Max is a lesbian."
Fang rolled his eyes. "And you're 'getting some'?"
Iggy glared at Fang. Why can't he just ever follow his plans, no questions asked. "Did you ever think that I don't want any?"
Fang rolled his eyes. "Explains why when I check my browser history on my laptop, there's all these porn sites that I know I did not go on."
"What I do at night, when I'm alone is between me and my bed sheets."
Fang decided to leave before Iggy revealed something else to him. Especially because they were all gay porn sites. Fang shuddered, running down the hallway and into Max's room. They had decided to stay with her mother for awhile. Fang got the attic, Nudge and Angel got the living room, Gasman and Iggy were supposed to stay together in the spare bedroom but now Fang knew why Iggy always kicked him out and Fang got stuck with the Gasman. Again with the shudder. Max shared a room with her half-sister Ella. Right now, Ella was at school so Max was alone in the room.
"Hey Max-" He stopped, looking at her. She was in bed, which was odd as it was three in the afternoon, holding her stomach. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. What did you want?"
The sixteen year old took a deep breath. Here goes nothing. "I want to get to know you better."
Max groaned. Her stomach was feeling horrible right now and she did not have time to deal with him. "Fang I know more than enough about you."
"Not a more personal level." Fang walked over to her. "And, you can also tell me why you've been so bit-" Oops, all most called her bitchy. That would not end well. "I mean, you've been acting weird recently and I would," He cringed, saying this, "love to know why?"
If Max wasn't in desperate need, she would have hit him in the head and kicked him out of her room. But she only had one more left so- "You really want to know?"
He nodded. "Yeah."
"I'm on my…"
"You're on what? I didn't hear the last w-"
"Period Fang, period."
He made a gagging noise. He was going to kill Iggy… "God Max, I didn't want to know that!"
"You asked and you wanted to get to know each other." She huffed, her hair falling over her eyes a little. She would look so good right now if he didn't know that she was…ew. "Besides, I wouldn't had told you if I didn't need you to do something for me."
His eyes widened. Iggy's a genius! Clearly, sex will make her feel better. Wait…if she's on her period…ah man! That was a complete turn off. But, if this was his one chance… "Okay, let's do it. Now."
Max gave him a weird look. "Fang, I was going to ask you to go to the store for me."
Utter defeat. He sighed. "For what? Are we out of soda?"
"No, Fang." Was she really going to have to ask?
"Toilet paper?"
He's getting warmer. Max shook her head. "I need you to go get me some…"
"Some?"
"Tampons."
Fang stared at her. "What?"
"Please Fang? I really need some more and my mom's at work and-"
"Why don't you do it?"
"Because my stomach is seriously cramping right now-"
"Okay, okay, shut up." He stood up. He was going to get her tampons? God that was a far drop from what he was hoping for. "Do you need anything else?"
"No."
Fang went over to the dresser and grabbed a twenty. She so owned him. He went back into the living room.
"Well that was fast." Iggy commented.
"I have to go to the store."
Iggy was shocked. His plan had actually worked! All thanks to his gayness, he knew exactly what Max wanted. Wait…did he just think of himself as gay again? God, this is the longed faze he's ever gone through…"For condoms?"
"No! I already have those." He was all prepared and everything! "For…tampons."
Iggy burst out laughing. "Seriously?"
Fang glared at him. "I don't know why you find it so funny. You're coming too."
"Which one?" Fang asked.
"How am I supposed to know?"
"Well, I just thought since you're gay and all-"
"I am not gay."
"Tell that to my laptop. You gave it a virus you know." Fang glared at his blind best friend.
"Yeah well-"
"Forget it." Fang sighed. "Did she say pads or tampons?"
"I think that you told me tampons."
"Yeah but…" He looked at them. There were so many different kinds! Max should have been more specific. He was almost sure that she had said pads. Yeah, he decided after thinking about it. She defiantly said pads. "She said pads."
Iggy sighed. "I don't get why girls need both."
"Me either." Fang sighed. "I'm getting her the cheapest one."
"No, don't."
"Why not?"
"She'll think that you don't care."
"Well, I'm sure as hell not paying seven dollars for some stupid tampons!"
"I thought you said that she said pads?"
"Same thing!"
Iggy sighed. "What's the cheapest?"
"4.86."
"Then get one for six. You always go up the middle."
"Not when you're gay. Then you always go for the ass, right Ig?"
"Hey, I'm helping you aren't I?"
Fang sighed, grabbing a thing of pads. "Alright, let's go."
"Here Max." Fang tossed her the bag.
"Thanks." She mumbled. Fang had been gone for over half an hour! What the hell was he doing? She stared at the pack of pads. "Fang I told you tampons!"
"And? Doesn't it all work the same?"
Max groaned. "Fang, go get me some tampons."
"No. Use those."
"I don't like using-"
"And? I don't like buying them."
"You're the one that asked what was-"
"I never said, 'Hey Max, out of tampons? I'll go get them for you.'"
"Yeah but you didn't even get me tampons."
"Well…there were a lot of things there, okay?"
"And, I hate Kotex."
"…What?"
"The brand Fang."
"Oh…but look at the flower on it! I thought it would make you feel better."
Max groaned. "Just go get me Always and make sure that it's tampons."
Fang glared at her. "Fine but you so owe me sex."
"Yeah, whatever."
"I can't believe that I pretended to be nice to you and didn't even get sex out of it. Not only that but I had to buy tampons? For a gay guy, Iggy doesn't know girls at all."
Max's eyes widened. "What?"
Fang stared at her. Did he say that out loud? "Max-"
"Fang, we just had sex last week!"
"Yeah but-"
"If you thought that one week with out it was bad, see how bad it will be now."
Fang frowned, walking out of the room. He never gets what he wants…
