Thank you Ria and Sira for another wonderful exchange, this definitely took me out of my comfort zone to write. My to my wonderful Beta, Ayame, and to JoAryn for helping me with the story line.
I was asked to write and J/C post Endgame story with a rating of NC-17. I apologize in advance for any mistakes.
Paramount owns everything, I make no money from this.
Freezing at Lake George
Kathryn made sure that she had enough wood for the night before she settled in for the evening. She had thought that coming to Lake George instead of staying in the big empty house in Indiana would be a small comfort, since her mother was away visiting Phoebe. The memories of past Christmases were just getting her depressed. Maybe I should have gone to Tom and B'Elanna's instead of insisting that I would be fine spending Christmas alone, she thought as she looked out the window at the frozen lake. Damn Shinzon, for causing so much trouble. If it wasn't for him I would be with Mom and Phoebe for Christmas.
The political mess that he created had taken several months clean up, and then the death of Data, Starfleet's only android who wanted to become human, had been a hard hit for everyone, but mostly for the crew of the Enterprise. Things were just now settling down to the point where she was able to take time off, but when her mother had made the travel arrangements Kathryn had barely been able to come home to sleep before someone called for her to return to the office.
She had tried to read a book, but her mind couldn't focus. Instead, it drifted toward Chakotay, what was he doing now? Was he still on Earth? Endless questions flooded her mind, and she was unable to answer any of them. She had heard not long after their return that he had broken up with Seven, or more accurately, that they had terminated their relationship on friendly terms. She was secretly glad that he was no longer seeing Seven, but that had been was over a year ago. Was he seeing someone else? Another blonde perhaps?
She shook her head, determined not to think about Chakotay or his love life any more. Getting a cup of coffee and returning to the window, she thought about her life since their return to the Alpha quadrant - or lack thereof. The Maquis and Equinox crew were free, with the choice to stay in Starfleet if they wanted. Things did get a little sticky for her concerning the incident with Noah Lessing, but in the end, a formal reprimand was put on her record and the matter was dropped. What surprised her was that it was the only one, after all the times she had bent the Prime Directive, but Starfleet was in desperate need of good PR since the Dominion War, and Voyager's return was it. Everyone, including her, was given promotions and several months of leave. She had decided not to take the leave just yet, thinking that working would help her adjust to her old life again.
She missed her Voyager family badly. Even though she tried to keep in touch with everyone, it still wasn't the same. Those who decided to stay in Starfleet left for other postings and were unable to attend any parties that Tom planned-not that she was able to attend many herself, being the Admiral attached to the Romulan department. But she attended as many as she could and would go back into work the next day feeling more upbeat and energetic than the day before.
The temperature outside was -18 degrees Celsius, and the wind was bitter cold and constantly blowing, making the temperature feel like -23 degrees Celsius. The snow on the ground crunched under the weight of the man walking along the road to his destination.
He came from a very warm planet, and even though he had lived on Earth or in space for thirty some odd years now, he could never get used to the cold of the winters in New York. He pulled his stocking cap down further over his ears and put his head down to try to keep a little warmer while he walked, adjusting the bag on his shoulder occasionally.
He thought of the woman who was sitting alone in a cabin up the road about one kilometer ahead. This was her favorite holiday, and even though this was the second year back from the Delta quadrant, Kathryn was all alone, and he intended to change that. B'Elanna and Tom had let it slip accidentally on purpose that she was at the cabin on Lake George all by herself, and had suggested that he go and visit her.
The cabin was four kilometers north of the transport station. The wind was picking up again, blowing the powder snow into the air, covering Chakotay. By the time he got to the cabin, Chakotay could no longer feel his limbs or his face. Knocking on the door, he hoped that Kathryn wouldn't mind the surprise visit. He slung his bag higher on his shoulder and waited.
Kathryn opened the door and gasped in surprise. She motioned for him to come inside, but he could tell from the look in her eyes that she didn't know who he was.
"Stand by the fire and thaw out," she ordered as she walked out of the room for a few minutes.
Chakotay stood by the fire, barely shuffling his feet to move. His coat and pants had been frozen and as he started to warm up he began to shake uncontrollably, Kathryn returned with several blankets, putting them down on the chair by the fire.
"So, who are you and what are you doing out there on a night like this?" Kathryn asked as she turned around, noticing that he was having difficulty getting out of his clothes. She took a few steps and started to help him out of the coat.
Chakotay, unable to move his lips or his mouth much, was only able to reply in a soft whisper, "C-c-c-c-c-co-o-.
"I know, let's get you out of these clothes and warmed up and then you can answer my questions," Kathryn said as she took off his coat and hung it up by the door. She continued, "Let me get something hot to warm you up."
"I hope you like coffee, but I didn't kno..."
When she returned Chakotay could feel the snow on his face melting. He turned when he heard her footsteps, and she suddenly gasped again, frozen in her tracks. Her eyes were as wide as saucers. Dropped the cup of coffee she was carrying and covered her mouth.
Chakotay, still cold and shivering uncontrollably, offered her an embarrassed smile before he managed to say,"S-s-s-surrpprissse."
Kathryn struggled to speak, her eyes showing a few emotions before settling on anger though, but he did catch a glimpse of love before her eyes, "Chakotay? What in the world are you doing outside on a night like this? Are you trying to freeze to death?"
Chakotay could see her hands visibly shake a little as she walked slowly toward him, still unsure if it really was him. He noticed that she had completely forgotten about her precious coffee. Maybe there is hope for her yet, he thought. He didn't stop her as she reached up and took off his stocking cap. He could see her struggling to contain her emotions as she realized that it really was him.
"C-c-couldn't have you b-by yourself-f on C-c-c-Christmas." he said softly, stuttering.
"Okay, enough talk for now, let's get you warmed up," she said, stoking up the fire, and making it roar. "I'll go and get you a towel to dry off, and then I'll replicate you some dry clothes," she said before she left the room. She wasn't gone long, and came back with a big fluffy towel. "Stay in front of the fire and call me when you're ready for the clothes." She left, going into the kitchen, her mind a flurry of unanswered questions about his presence here.
She replicated clothes and got out some red wind and two glasses. A few moments later, she heard Chakotay trying to call her, still stuttering a bit. She had the clothes in one hand and the bottle and glasses in the other. She handed the clothes off to him and set the other stuff on the table next to the loveseat, which was in front of the fire.
"I have to clean up the coffee I spilled," she said leaving the room again, Chakotay quickly put on the pants, and was putting on the shirt when she came back with a towel and started sopping up the coffee. When she was done, she stood in the doorway to the living room, watching as Chakotay tried to warm himself up by the fire. Her stomach was doing dive bombers all of a sudden.
Taking a deep breath, she walked to the loveseat and sat down, pouring herself and Chakotay a glass of wine. He sat on the opposite side of the couch and took the glass she offered him.
After a couple of hours of talking about the crew and how his family was doing on Trebus, Kathryn decided to ask him why he came to see her.
"So, you told me you didn't want me to be alone on Christmas. I appreciate that, but why would that make you think freezing to death was a good solution?" Kathryn asked sharply, after taking a sip of her wine.
"Actually, I just got back this afternoon, and B'Elanna had me transport here. She told me to come and see you-not that I didn't want to to begin with-she just said that you were all alone for Christmas, and threatened to lock me up with Tom in a small room with his 20th century music and his wisecracking and promised not to let me out for a week." Chakotay said chuckling.
Trying not to smile, she just shook her head at him, "So you thought that it would be a good idea to just show up here? What would have happened if I got called back to headquarters?"
"Then B'Elanna would have told me and I would have found you at headquarters." Taking a sip of his wine, he added, "So why are you alone on your favorite holiday?"
"No, I'm not done yet. Why didn't you get proper clothes?" Kathryn asked, challenging him with an raised eyebrow.
"Because I didn't think to check the weather, let alone plan for a very cold, four kilometer walk. But I had to come, what kind of friend would I be if I let you spend Christmas alone?"
"Okay, so very poor planning on your part, and I appreciate it, but really, you didn't have to come out here, I would have been fine." Kathryn said, finishing her wine.
Chakotay put his arm on the back of the loveseat, and whispered in her ear, "I will drop anything I'm doing to prevent you from being alone." He kissed her neck just below her ear.
The tension in the room just sky rocketed, and it took everything that Kathryn had not to visibly react. Her mind was in turmoil, between finally letting him through the barriers that she had put up or just to keep some distance between them.
Kathryn turned to face him, which left their faces mere centimeters from each other. "Chakotay, I'm not the captain anymore, you don't have to take care of me," she whispered back.
Chakotay gazed into her eyes, sparks flying between them. Neither one moved, just enjoying the sensation of having the other so close. Kathryn finally spoke, "Mom is visiting Phoebe off planet, and there wasn't enough room for me when the Shinzon affair ended." Kathryn went to move and put some space between them, but Chakotay had other ideas. He held her head, putting their foreheads together.
"Kathryn, I think it's time to change those parameters."
"Chakotay," she whispered, "I don't know if I can."
"Trust me, Kathryn. We're both miserable without the other," he said softly, nudging her nose with his.
Kathryn's mind was telling her no, and that he would run off when the next blonde showed interest in him. But her heart was telling her the opposite. She had wanted to break those damn parameters for years now, so what was stopping her? Her two failed engagements, for one, and the knowledge that loving Chakotay would consume her much like it had with Justin. She knew that she was afraid of letting herself love like that again.
"Chakotay, I love you but I can't do this" she whispered, tears pooling in her eyes.
"Yes, you can. It's time to stop thinking Kathryn and let your heart take over." Chakotay whispered as he wiped away the tears that escaped.
"I wish it were that simple." she said closing her eyes, "The love I had for Justin was all consuming, I couldn't do or say anything without thinking of or mentioning him, I almost died with him that day, I would have jumped in after them if I could have walked. I'm afraid that something will happen to you because I don't want to live without you."
"I can't promise you that nothing will happen to me, but I can promise you that I won't willingly leave you." he said softly and kissed her lips lightly.
Kathryn couldn't fight the attraction between them anymore. She wrapped her arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. They broke apart, needing air. Looking deep into his eyes, Kathryn saw all the love that he had for her. She kissed him lightly, and stood up, pulling him with her. "This love seat isn't big enough for this,." she said, leading him to her bedroom.
Once they were in her bedroom, and facing each other, neither one moved to close the space between them as they gazed at each other, the anticipation building for both of them, Kathryn didn't know who moved first, but the next thing she knew, Chakotay was kissing her with a deep, built up passion that awoke her carnal desires from deep within her.
She maneuvered Chakotay so that the back of his knees hit the edge of the bed, and pulled his shirt off over his head, and tossing it behind her. Pushing him backwards, she quickly had his pants unbuttoned, and Chakotay grabbed her hands stilling them before she could take them off.
"Hey, slow down, we have all night," he said, tugging her up and kissing her deeply, Kathryn moaned into his mouth, but she pulled away.
"Chakotay, I haven't made love in over ten years, and for most of those, I've been fantasizing about you, I think I've waited long enough," Kathryn said as she pulled his pants off. They were followed quickly by his boxers. Kathryn hastily took off her clothes and climbed on top of Chakotay, kissing him lightly. She began kissing and licking her way down his chest stopping to suck on a nipple and then the other, before continuing her way down his chest.
Chakotay, knowing that Kathryn needed to be in control, lay back, enjoying her lasciviousness, moaning his appreciation, until she took his hardened member into her mouth. He inhaled a hiss through his teeth at the new sensation of her mouth. Kathryn nipped, licked, and sucked his hard shaft until he pulled her up to his mouth. "I don't want to cum like that for our first time." he said kissing her before he rolled them both over so that he was on top.
Kathryn was soon moaning and writhing under Chakotay's ministrations, as he sucked hard on each nipple before kissing his way to her moist center. He sucked hard on her clitoris making her arch her back off the bed, and soon inserted a finger into her opening and began pumping..
Kathryn was close. She held Chakotay's head in place as her hips bucked. Chakotay had to hold her down with his free hand, and when he inserted a second finger, Kathryn came, shouting out his name. He kept his fingers inside her until her orgasm subsided, and then pulled them out, licking her juices off of his fingers before he crawling up and kissing her passionately, letting her taste herself.
Chakotay felt the change in Kathryn as she began to adjust her body to his hard member at her opening. "Chakotay, please... I need you inside me," she moaned as his hands roamed over her body.
Taking his cue from her, Chakotay slid slowly into her and stilled himself, allowing her time to adjust to his size. Soon Kathryn was moving underneath him, so he began pumping in and out of her. Kathryn encouraged him to go faster and harder, and soon she felt another orgasm building. She pulled one leg higher on to his back, letting him in as deep as he could go.
Kathryn closed her eyes to help fight the impending climax, but it was no use. She was soon tipped over the edge as she threw her head back and gripped Chakotay's back as hard as she could. Chakotay took no notice to the pain her nails were causing. The sight of her in the throes of passion and her inner walls clenching him drew him over the edge, and after another thrust, he emptied his seed into her. Unable to move, they stayed like that until their breathing returned to normal.
Chakotay rolled off to the side, pulling her with him. As she came down from the euphoric high, Kathryn started to shiver. "I need to clean up," she said getting out of bed and walking into the bathroom. Chakotay took advantage of having her out of bed, by turning down the covers and laying back down to wait for her. Kathryn soon came out of the bathroom and climbed into bed, snuggling into his chest while he wrapped his arms around her. Sleep soon overtook them.
They made love several times thoughout the night and early morning. And they were still sleeping when they were awakened by footsteps out in the living room. Both of them were instantly alert, Chakotay got out of bed quickly, and found his pants and pulled them on.
Kathryn, who had quickly grabbed a robe, and handed Chakotay a spare phaser she had in her nightstand, "Do I even want to know?" he whispered, taking the phaser, Kathryn just shrugged. With both of them armed, they began to slowly and silently make their way down the hall, using hand signals to tell the other what to do.
"Hello?" came the all-too-familiar voice of Tom Paris.
"I'm going to kill him," replied Chakotay softly.
"You go and get dressed and let me take care of him," she replied, handing Chakotay the phaser.
Waiting until Chakotay closed the door, Kathryn adjusted the tie on her robe and walked into the living room. "Lieutenant Paris. You have better have a good reason for breaking into my cabin and almost getting yourself shot," she said sharply, slipping into her command voice.
Tom's eyes widened in surprise, and he turned around quickly. He suddenly felt about two feet tall as he took in her appearance, disheveled hair, bare feet, robe slightly opened-and it didn't look like she was wearing anything underneath it. But what really made him cringe was the look. He hadn't seen that look since she demoted him back in the Delta Quadrant.
Tom was just about to apologize when Chakotay walked out from somewhere in the back of the house, Tom wished that the floor would swallow him up or that some other emergency would happen.
"Well, Lieutenant, I'm waiting," Kathryn pressed, showing her impatience as Chakotay walked up behind her.
"S-s-sorry, C-c-captain," Tom stammered, "B'Elanna sent me over to make sure that you would come and spend Christmas with us, but I'll tell her that you're busy." He turned to walk out before anything else could happen.
"Not so fast, Lieutenant. Just what the hell were you thinking, coming here first thing in the morning without calling me first?
Chakotay whispered into her ear, "It's almost noon, Kathryn."
She looked at him in surprise, "Well that still doesn't explain why he didn't call or even knock on the door."
"But Captain, I did try to call, I've left you five messages on your com-unit, and I did knock for almost half an hour." Tom explained hastily.
Kathryn again looked surprised, and glanced over at her com-unit in the corner. There was a light flashing, indicating that at least one message had been left. Quickly recovering from her assumptions, and noticing the Delta Flyer out of the window, she said, "Fine, Tom, call B'Elanna and tell her that we'll be there in two hours, and make yourself comfortable, because you're giving us a ride. "Chakotay?" she called as she headed down the hall.
Chakotay just shook his head saying, "Tom, she's going to kill you, and I almost feel sorry for you, but not quite." He followed Kathryn down the hall and closed the door behind him.
Tom sat down at the com-unit, dialed in his house and waited for B'Elanna to answer.
"Well?" she asked as soon as she saw his smiling face.
"You were right. I owe you a massage for a month," Tom said, still smiling at his wife. Things were definitely starting to look up for the crew of the U.S.S. Voyager.