Okay, another Destiel fic :) Inspired by this post ( post/44943459290) on Tumblr
The first thing Dean is aware of is the pain in his head. For a second it's his whole world and all he can do is groan loudly. Or at least, he tries to. In the end it comes out softer then he wants; probably because of how scratchy his throat is. What he wouldn't give for a gleaming cup of beer…
"Dean?"
His world is suddenly pierced by that question and he frowns. What on earth…?
"Dean? Are you awake?"
In response he groans again, turning his face away from the voice. It was annoying him, what with its despicable, high-pitched worry…
"Please Dean…"
The pleading in the person's voice was intolerable and made Dean feel…like he was a little shit for daring to keep his eyes closed any longer. Ugh…he wanted to voice but couldn't, so instead he just grimaced. He didn't want to, but…
He blearily opened his eyes, blinking furiously at the white light that pierced them. Eventually he got a clear picture…and needless to say he didn't like what he saw.
"Hospital?" he croaked, moving his head a little to get a better view of the room.
"No, wait, shh…Drink this first."
Dean looked towards the voice and was relieved to see Sam. He opened his mouth to greet him but got a stern glare in return. He rolled his eyes but let his younger brother feed him some water through a straw.
"Heya Sammy. What's shakin'?" he was finally able to ask, his voice clearer and his throat no longer feeling like that would embedded with knives.
"Nothing much." Sam answered with one of the biggest bitch-faces known to man.
"Except for the fact that I'm stuck in a hospital." Dean added, looking around curiously. Honestly, he couldn't remember why he was here. Last thing he remembered was leaving work and having a quick drink with Bobby, his boss…Maybe that was it? Maybe he was too drunk to drive and—
He couldn't remember drinking that much.
But it was the only thing that fit.
"Did I hurt anyone Sam?" Dean asked resignedly, praying for the first time to the angels he didn't believe in that he hadn't. He couldn't deal with the guilt.
"…What?" Sam asked in reply, frowning worriedly.
"Did I hurt anyone? I mean, I must've been really drunk and couldn't see straight or something, but I really hope I wasn't drunk enough to actually hurt someone." He repeated, his throat beginning to close up. If he hurt someone…He would never forgive himself. Neither would Cas.
Cas…
Where was Cas? He would've expected his boyfriend to be by his beside, worrying like crazy and probably hissing protectively every time someone came near…okay, the hissing thing wasn't true but still. Maybe it was after hours and he wasn't allowed in the room…
"…You didn't hurt anyone Dean…" Sam finally answered confusedly, looking at him with—
"Don't."
"Don't what?"
"Don't pity me. I'm in a hospital, so what? I'll be probably out of here soon. And not only that, I'll probably have a few weeks off, which means that I'll get to hang out with my boyfriend all day." Dean grinned, almost excited despite himself. Sure he was going to be in some pain for the next few weeks…but hey, movie marathons with Cas didn't sound like the worst thing in the world! Besides, he hadn't really hung out with Cas in what felt like a very long time…
His excitement ebbed away however when Sam's face dropped and for a second he could almost see tears in his eyes.
"What? Sammy, what's wrong?" he asked, nervousness making him begin to shake. He really didn't like the look on his brother's face…
"Dean, um…" was all he replied.
"Dammit Sam, tell me what's wrong! I can take it. Am I going to die? Did I actually hurt someone? Am I never going to walk again? Sammy, please—"
"There's nothing wrong with you Dean." Sam finally answered. But it was still too vague.
"Then what? I did hurt someone didn't I? Goddammit, I shouldn't have drank—I'm such a fucking idiot—"
"It's Cas." Sam finally cried, his voice choked up a little and making Dean frown.
"What about him?"
"…The doctor said you might temporarily forget memories close to the accident…"
"Sam—"
"What's the last thing you remember Dean?" Sam asked, his tears forgotten it seemed.
"I…I just left Bobby's after a drink or two." Dean answered, a bad feeling coiling in his stomach.
"Dean, that was a couple of hours before the accident."
"What?"
"…I don't know what happened. Only memories will tell. All I know is…you and Cas were in the car, Cas was driving—"
"Ha, like I'd let you drive."
"It was only one beer!"
"One drink's enough Dean! You shouldn't have even been driving home from work, no matter how close it is—"
"And he wasn't paying attention. He ran a stop light and—"
"Are you being fucking serious right now Cas?"
"I am! This is ridiculous. I just…I can't Dean. Ever since your mother's death, you've been at work day in and day out. We barely even see each other anymore. Honestly, me spending a few weeks at Anna's won't be much of a difference."
"For God's sake—"
"I understand okay?! My mother died too you know. But…it's been almost half a year."
"What? You expect me to get over it?"
"Of course not! I just want…I want my boyfriend back…"
"…Cas, I…I…CAS!"
"DEA—"
"Stop." Dean gasped, the memories hitting him like a tidal wave.
"Hello Dean…"
"Oh, hey baby! Yum…what smells so good?"
"Dinner…not that you'll be enjoying it very much. It's cold."
"…Oh…Cas what is all this?"
"Today is our anniversary."
"…Oh."
"You forgot."
"Cas, I—"
"Just…just leave it alone Dean—"
"I'm really, really sorry."
"...Bullshit."
"What?"
"…Bull. Shit."
"What the fuck Cas?"
"If you really gave a rat's ass, you would have done damn well take care to remember our anniversary—You what? No! You're not allowed to talk! Just shut up and let me speak! You, you're never here anymore! It's like this house, me, plagues you! It's like you don't even care about me anymore. And fine, people can fall out of love, but please…please just tell me so I don't have to waste my time any longer."
"…Cas, it's nothing like that. I just went for a drink with Bobby. I didn't mean—"
"Good. You spent our anniversary with your boss."
"Would you—"
"No! Just-just stop!"
"No, you stop! Why don't we…c'mon, let's go for a drive. We'll cool down our heads, maybe get some hamburgers, maybe even some chocolate cake…let's just go talk okay?"
"…Fine."
"Dean…?"
"…I-I need to see him Sam."
"…Dean…"
"I don't care how hurt I am! I need to see him—"
"You can't! He's dead!" Sam finally snapped, before his eyes widened in shock. He obviously didn't mean to snap, but the damage was already done…
Dean's eyes were dangerously wide and his hands were creepily still. "No..."
"Th-the car was speeding and hit you guys. It hit the driver's side head on and…"
"C-Cas…" Dean asked when he finally gained consciousness.
The man never answered, making Dean open is eyes worriedly.
Once he did, he wished he hadn't.
Cas laid in in the seat next to his, his neck twisted at an odd angle and blood seemed to be pouring from every part of his body. Blood dribbled from his mouth and no breath seemed to be coming from it.
"Cas…No…please." Dean began to sob, trying to move. But his head was really hurting and his arm felt like it was fire…Maybe he should go for a nap. And maybe, if he were lucky, he'd join Cas wherever he was.
"The car flipped a few times and you hit your head. That would explain the lost memories. Cas…he was dead on impact." Sam whispered sadly, looking at Dean with such pity and such sadness all Dean would do was not break down immediately.
Voices were everywhere. Blinding lights and shrieking cries hurt his head. He couldn't remember a lot…all he knew was he needed Cas. Needed to see him, hold him…
"Cas?" he asked, opening his eyes despite the pain it brought.
"It's okay; just relax." Someone said nearby.
"Caaaaaaass…." He asked again, looking around him quickly until he spotted it. He gave an outraged cry and tried to get up, but someone held him down.
"Stop…He's not, he can't…nooooo," he cried, looking as his boyfriend was lifted into a black body bag.
"No, please…I was going to ask…ask him…to marry meeee...I love…I love him."
Dean began to cry.
Another part might be in store :) Just let me know if you'd read it!