I was in love; I am in love still, every time the name 'Augustus Waters' slips from my lips my heart skips a beat. Every time I picture him in my head, that lop sided grin stuck upon his face, I cant stop myself from smiling, but I no he's not there, a dream, a vision, a thought but I cant stop thinking about him, seeing him, his crystal eyes staring right at me, making me feel or sloppy and gooey and nervous like a teenage girl looking at her crush but he's not my crush he's my infinity, my infinity that's gone, my little infinity
Ever since he's gone everything is dull, the colour got drained out this world as he did. He took the sparkle out my eye and took away with him so he could remember me. My life now is normal, ordinary which to some people may ok but for me its different with Gus I was alive, living every moment but without him I'm living for the sake of the others around me, the others I would leave behind. My situation as my mother calls it would explain why I'm here. Sat on a lonely bench isolated in the middle of a park, staring up at the sky. Trying to get a glimpse of the stars behind the light and the blue trying to spot our constellations. See this is one of the faults in our stars, they are beautiful, little spots of light, brightening up the world, but there are only visible when most people aren't looking when most people are in bed. They are always there, brightening up my day, but I just can't see them, like Augustus Waters, my Augustus Waters.
What would you do I you saw me sitting, there my eyes dull looking down, staring at my shoes. You might avoid me, just thinking I'm a depressed lonely soul, and if you were that desperate to find a seat you might perch unwillingly on the end the bench avoiding my glare, but you'd never talk to me, but he did. The boy who sat down next to me and casually said 'Hi'. In which the only acceptable reply would be to lift my head, and slowly, softly, reply 'hi' back. He inched closer to me 'How are you doing today'. I jerked away 'Excuse me' I exclaimed.
'What' he replied his tone casual and smooth, 'Should a gentleman not ask a fine looking woman how she's doing today'. I stood up facing him so he could see the look of disgust in my eyes, 'Are you flirting with me'.
'No ' he replied quickly
'Then what are you doing'
'I guess I'm still looking for Alaska.