Disclaimer: If you've seen them on the show, they aren't mine. They belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just borrowing them.

This is slightly AU. Michael is Alex's boyfriend and they're living together.

Please review for the next chapter!

Alex surveys herself critically in the mirror, eying the liberal amount of foundation that covers her face. So much is caked on that she could easily be mistaken for a china doll, but it does the job it's meant for. She just hopes Olivia doesn't notice.

Smirking, she discards the thought. Of course Olivia will notice. She's a detective and she notices everything. Maybe Alex even wants her to.

"Bye, Lex," calls her boyfriend, Michael, from the bedroom as Alex opens the front door of her apartment. "I love you, babe. Be back by five."

"I will," she calls. She's learned never to say, "I'll try," like she used to. She will be home by five, otherwise her reward will be a shopping trip to buy some more concealer to cover the rainbows on her frail body. Deep blues and purples, dark reds and yellows and blacks that need to be concealed by layers of foundation on her pale skin. When she isn't wearing makeup, she looks like some perverse art project. Except that the colours come from cuts and bruises rather than markers and paint.

Alex rushes into the precinct twenty minutes late, apologizing as she enters the squad room. "Sorry, there was an accident near my house." There wasn't, but she's hoping that they don't know that.

"Did you get the warrant?" is Elliot's greeting.

Shit, she didn't. "No. I forgot. I'm sorry, Elliot. I'll go get it now."

"You forgot," repeats Elliot, raising an incredulous eyebrow. Obviously, he's not buying it.

He has a right to be sceptical. Alex isn't being entirely honest here. She got back to her office at 5:30 yesterday, intending on going out to get the warrant, but Michael had been waiting for her in her office. "You promised you'd be home half an hour ago," he'd growled.

Not wanting to make a scene in front of her colleagues, Alex had apologized and got into the car with him to go back to their apartment. Surviving the night was more important than getting the warrant.

Olivia peers at Alex. "Are you okay, Alex?"

She snaps out of her melancholy. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'll go get the warrant now."

* * *

An hour later, she's back at the precinct. She hands Elliot the warrant. "Sorry it's late," she apologizes again.

Elliot nods. "Come on, Liv," he says. "Let's go search this guy's place."

But Olivia's eyes linger on Alex's face, and she knows she hasn't fooled the detective for a moment. "Lunch, Alex?"

"Sure," she agrees. She doesn't want to, but she knows that declining would make Olivia suspicious, and she certainly doesn't want that.

* * *

They're sitting in a café near the precinct, Alex desperately trying to evade the subject of the bruises on her face. She chats with Olivia about the weather, about the case, about a television show she'd watched last night, trying to keep her away from the one question she's sure Olivia wants to ask.

Finally, Olivia leans back in her chair and cuts to the chase. "Alex, I'm worried about you."

Alex suppresses a smirk. "Why?"

Instead of answering, Olivia says, "It's Michael, isn't it?"

"W-what about him?"

"Ever since you've met him, you've changed," comments Olivia.

Alex doesn't bother to deny it because she knows it's true. She used to be so confident, so ambitious, so determined and strong. She used to give every case her all, spending hours preparing for each opening argument, at the office at all hours. That was one thing she and Olivia had in common. She used to stand up straight and look everyone in the eye, holding herself with pride. But now, she's only an echo of what once was, a broken ghost of the old Alex Cabot.

"Alex," says Olivia gently, leaning closer to her. "What's the matter?"

She debates telling Olivia the truth. Olivia's the only one that she trusts enough to even consider this; they're best friends and she knows Olivia will never judge her.

But then she discards the idea. No one must know what happens at home. "Nothing, Liv," she says, managing a small smile that she hopes is convincing enough to appease the detective. "I'm fine."

* * *

But she's not fine. When she gets back to her apartment at exactly 4:57 and starts dinner, the expression on Michael's face as he lounges on the living room couch is almost disappointed. Disappointed that she wasn't going to give him an excuse to hit her.

"How was work, babe?" asks Michael.

"Good," replies Alex. "Um, what do you want for dinner?"

"I was thinking we could go out and have a romantic evening."

She comes out into the family room and perches next to her boyfriend on the couch. "That would be nice."

He smiles and pulls her onto his lap. Alex cringes at the unexpected touch and her body tenses as Michael begins to rub circles into her back, flinching each time he touches a particularly sensitive spot.

"You're so beautiful, Lex," he murmurs into her ear, running his fingers through her long blonde hair. "I love you so much, babe."

"I love you, too," replies Alex, but it's more out of reflex than anything. She doesn't exactly know whether or not she loves him. He's usually a good guy, but he does have those moments where he just loses it and lashes out. These moments are becoming more and more frequent.

His hands still on her back and he pulls up her shirt and unclasps her bra. Alex holds her breath as he runs his fingers up her sides and cups her breasts with his hands. "I want you," he moans. "God, you're so fucking beautiful."

Alex isn't comfortable with the way he's touching her and tries to push him away. "You know what, Michael, let's not do this right now."

The blow is so unexpected that she doesn't have time to duck. Her hand flies to her cheek, which is reddening where Michael just smacked it. "You don't say no to me," he hisses in her ear, running his hands along her sides and flat stomach, making her shiver in revulsion and fear.

Finally, he's done touching her. "Lex, go change for dinner," he orders her. "Wear something pretty, maybe your blue dress."

Alex has to wonder about herself when she nods and immediately obeys.

This isn't her.

Please review for more!