disclaimer: FANfiction. think about it. all i own is the plot. i would never have had the genius for all that is kingdom hearts-like putting disney and ff characters in there. Don't sue

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Ch. 1: Whisper

Catch me as I fall, say you're here and it's all over now

"Sora! Come back! Sora! Please! Don't go! Don't leave me here! Somebody help me please," I scream and beg as the darkness presses against me, crushing me, and I-I'm… fading.

"No!" I scream again, shrieking in fear as I find my body entangled, unable to move, and I open my eyes my screams no longer forming any words just sounds of pure terror. I look around from my prone position, slowly managing to move my arm. It's a blanket... just a blanket... I was dreaming... I'm awake… it was just a dream, I got myself tangled up in the blanket, I realize trying to slow my even breathing wondering why my eyes seem so heavy and hard to move. I rub them quickly they're crusted over a little from sleep but my face is wet... I'd been crying... that explained the sticky unpleasant feeling... why my eyes hadn't seemed to open properly. And still calming myself I remembered it was all just a dream... nothing to get worked up over. But... What if something like that does happen? There's no one to protect me. It's enough to make me shiver in fear. I'm all alone.

I hear a knock at the door. "Come in." The replica came in (of course he thought he was the real thing). "Hi Riku."

"Another nightmare?"

"Yeah." He knew me too well after such a short time.

"What happened?"

"The darkness attacked me. Sora... he was there too... and I wanted help and called out to him but then he left… disappeared." I laugh bitterly, "Just like real life isn't it? No one cares. But it's not like I have a claim on him…" After all I've never even met Sora… so why would he help? I only saw him in her memories… and my dreams. But there was more to my dream that I hadn't told the clone... when Sora had left he seemed... angry, furious really... I wondered if it was my mind trying to warn me or just my own fear... I didn't want him to hate me but would he if this didn't work? If he ever found out? He would have every reason to...

I flinched at a sudden contact on my shoulder. Warmth, human touch... or well touch at least as I wasn't sure if either of us qualified as human... whatever it was, it was so rare. And usually a bad thing. It meant I was going to get hit... or have a major invasion of my personal space that always made me fearful and uncomfortable... even if I didn't understand why. But the replica (I hated even thinking about him like that… but it was true. He wasn't Riku just as I wasn't Kairi and wouldn't ever be) didn't comment- maybe he understood, I didn't know- but I was grateful he ignored it... instead he reassured me, "I don't understand how that idiot could abandon you. I won't. Ever."

"Sora… didn't abandon me. I had to go. It was… for the best." Another lie... the two of us had never even met... it was just these false memories I'd planted telling him this. But his sticking up for me it made me feel... almost happy. Or just remember a little bit of what happy felt like because if I was still real that's what I would feel...

But that couldn't distract me from the truth... Sora was coming and these dreams only got worse. The replica came and comforted me after every nightmare and I felt so, so, guilty I'd planted false memories and they'd make me plant more. When Sora comes… they want me to make both into puppets.

I'm frightened. But… there's so much more to come. It's only getting worse.

It's not enough that I do everything they say. They still want me to do more so they hit me, spit on me.

But…I don't WANT to hurt Sora. I know he doesn't deserve this; he's too good. But now I've hurt him anyway... or I'm about to. He's going to think his best friend hates him and that he abandoned his friend and in the end I'm expected to make him into... a... a pawn it's so wrong! God, someone, save me... I can't save myself... and I'm already damned... I'm in all this already... No way to back out. I'm just trapped, left to play this until its end...

A/N: this chapter is based on an evanescence song by the name of 'whisper' (hence the chapter title). it's an awesome song listen to it.