Happy Birthday Daddy!
Kael'thasxoc child IllidanxMaiev
Something from Warden's Cage, an Idea of 6 I had for my chapters but didn't think it would fit in with the story. I don't know if I'll post all 6 it depends on how BELCH I am feeling! Rated M for adult stuff... (sorry young pups!)
A small silver bell jingled on the side of a deep amber red night stand. A dark red covered lump groaned, squirming away from embracing his mate to shut it up. A mighty pale hand slapped it off the night stand. It crashed into the other wall silencing it's cries forever. Kael'thas gave a large yawn, showing off his his perfect white teeth and a pair of sparkling fangs, before nestling himself back into the darkness of the blankets and sweet forest scent of his wife.
He did not want to get up today. It meant something horrid would happen that even any sort of magic wouldn't be able to cure, he was getting older. He used to welcome his day of birth into the world as a celebration of him getting to the age of elven manhood. But now it just meant another year was shaved off his life and drew him ever closer to being buried with the worms. He hated the thought of it.
He had seen his grandfather aged and white as the moon itself. Wrinkles and liver spots and even forgetting some things. He cringed at the thought. He was young and handsome and still considered himself quite the prize for any woman. He groomed himself ritually and had his hair washed in 13 different shampoos and even had a towel just to condition it from the harsh climate he was forced to live in. He even made sure to mate on a regular basis, more so for enjoyment then physical exercise, to keep his stamina in peak condition.
Absent mindly, he started to grind against his wife's warm rear, nipping at her ear as a hand slipped between her legs. He had woken up with morning wood and wished nothing more then release from his ache. He wasn't surprised when she cursed at him in Darnassian and tried to squirm from his grasp. She was playing hard to get and it only drove him to try harder...
Until the door opened, his ears perked as he continued to fondle his wife. Light footsteps trotted across the dark marble floor over to his side. He felt a soft poke. "Daddy..." Squeaked a tiny voice. He groaned and turned around, leaving his wife to rest in peace. Dark green eyes, from months of Fel Energy tapping, met soft bluish white ones as clear as two beautiful blue skies. A smile was on the young Blood Elf/ Night Elf's face. "Happy day of birth daddy!"
He pretended to act slightly surprised. "Aww, Shydadorei, you remembered. I completely forgot." He sat up a bit, resting a hand under his cheek. He noticed she was already dressed, a bit sloppy, but dressed none the less, it only meant one thing. She wanted him up and ready to go on some silly little mission or party. His face wrinkled at the thought of a party... But he smiled to Shydadorei, who seemed to be more then eager to climb up on the bed and give him a kiss.
"Mama..." She poked the lump next to her daddy. "It's daddy's day of birth, common... We need to make him a cake since I can't touch the stove." Her long ears twitched as kisa snorted and covered herself up more. Shydadorei snorted and crossed her arms in a pout. Kael smiled and placed Shydadorei on the ground. "Give daddy and mama a few minutes sweety... We'll both be down soon..."
She gave a nod. She knew that daddy wanted to be left alone to wake up mama, she didn't know why, but knew there was lots of noises and something thumping against the walls and mama would always tell him no and eventually start screaming for more. Maybe they were having a pillow fight. She smiled and nodded and went running out of the bedroom and closed the door. Kael turned his attention back to Kisa, smirking. He ripped the blankets off the bed and chuckled darkly. "I want my birthday present..."
~0~
Illidan sighed as he glanced around the courtyard. It was bustling with Blood Elf activity. It didn't occur to him what day it was. He had more things to concern himself with like Maiev, who still wouldn't talk to him much. She was as stubborn as they come and he didn't even know what he did wrong this time! Was she still mad about him arguing in front of Shy? Or was it he wasn't giving her enough attention? For the love of Elune he spent almost every waking hour with her!
Women confused him, and irritated him, and pissed him off. He rubbed his temples and sighed. He reached out and grabbed a nearby elf, spinning him around. "What are you doing to my gardens elf?" he growled. The young Paladin smiled a little. "It's his highness' birthday. Shy decided we'd all get together to celebrate." Illidan let the boy elf go and the elf went back to work decorating. So Kael's birthday. He had to give a claw up to Shy, she certainly knew how to embarrass him without trying very hard.
Maybe he should do something nice for Kael. But what had the lil bratt done for him? At this point and time he really couldn't think of anything worthy of praise besides more minions to do his dirty work. He sighed and scratched a horn, he'd have to think of something...
~0~
Kael emerged from the bedroom refreshed and awake. Shydadorei nearly tackled him against the door. He chuckled and gave her a kiss. One of the most wonderful accomplishments he could of ever created, with the help of Kisa. She was a living treaty. A beacon of hope to those couples who wished to be together, but were separated by vicious families and stupid ancient racism. He gave her a hug and placed her up on his shoulders.
"Did you and mama have a good pillow fight?" Shydadorei peeked down, looking at her daddy with a smile. "Pillow fight? We weren't having a - oh!" He almost let it slipped out what they really did, which would of left to the explanation of Hawkstriders and bees, which he wasn't exactly prepared to do just yet. "Yes we did Shy, a very good pillow fight.." He smirked, thinking back to the state he had left Kisa. He loved it!
"Will mama be able to help me make a cake?" She clung to his ears, resting herself on his head.
"I don't think so, mama said she wasn't feeling very good. I think we should let her rest for now. But don't worry my little princess, I'll help you make the cake." Kael had NEVER been in a kitchen in his life. He'd been in Alchemists labs many times, but kitchen was woman's work. "I mean how hard is it to make food, right?" he glanced up to his little princess and smiled a bit. She giggled and kissed one of his ears. "It's real easy. Mama shows me how to all the time."
"And I wouldn't trust a man in a kitchen to save my life." Maiev was leaning against one of the large onyx pillars wearing a simple purple dress. Kael smiled a little and took note of how beautiful she looked today. He wondered what Illidan had to do to get her into such a risque dress AND make-up. But he wasn't complaining. "And I'm sure miss big bad Warden can do better?"
"Shy, why don't we go show daddy how things are done.." She pressed herself up close to Kael, boobs coming right in contact with his face, as she reached out for Shydadorei and picked her off her daddy's shoulders. "We'll make more then a cake, we'll make so much food that everyone will be so stuffed they'll fly away!"
"Yeah!" Squeaked Shy, smiling at her new aunty. Maiev cast a flirtatious glance at Kael and walked away with Shy, making sure to have a nice sway to her large hips. She wanted revenge for the two boys making the little girl cry a couple weeks ago. Illidan was bull-headed and dumb when it came to women and Kael was a superficial perverted man who thought with the lower regions. Put a little bit of her scent on Kael and things should get a little more entertaining for herself.
"So what kind of cake shall we make?" Maiev turned her attention to the girl in her arms. Shy smiled proudly. "Daddy loves strawberries! And vanilla and bananas." Maiev thought of the perfect thing. "Let's make him a strawberry banana bread cake then. But your going to have to tell me where the kitchen is."
"Kitchen, that's easy aunty Maiev." Shy pointed down a corridor. "Down that way!"
Maiev shrugged off the 'aunty' bit and preceded down the hall with her little accomplice in tow...
~0~
It was five hours later and the celebration was under way. Guards were popping open expensive wines, women in scantily clad clothing were dancing for entertainment and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Even Illidan's mood changed from a sour puss to a conversationalist, with Kael! The two rarely had time to talk on the terms of friends, but when they did, there was no stopping them. Their conversation started with Illidan talking about the new portal his minions had found to child names, and now to women.
Both had a little too much wine and things were starting to get a little fuzzy. "Ya know Kael..." Illidan gained his composure for a moment. "Out of all the pains in the asses here, you are the BEST!!... Of them all. And I've been wanting to say... That... You are... A... ladie's man... How do you do it!"
Kael smiled a little as a sexy Blood Elf refilled his silver goblet. "It's eashy.." He stated matter of factually. "Ya gotta know what they want and how they want it... Night Elphs are so EASY to read, like a booksh. Say you love Ewune and all is well!.." He blinked, then belched. "I think I... Woah... You... You... aresodrunk!!"
"Looksh who'sh talking!" Illidan growled. "You'z shwaying like... ya! That... thing... in the ground..."
"Treesh shtupid." Kael wrapped an arm around Illidan smiling. "If I didn't have a wifsh, I say we go back to my room..."
Illidan laughed. "Kael'fashth! You are not gay! And sides, I have Maief! I will make her mineeee..ee. Ya! She will gifh me TONS of childrenz! More then yours! And it will be wonderful..." Illidan leaned over and belched as loud as he could, which made Kael fall out of the chair he was sitting in, laughing as hard as he could. Illidan laughed as well, cheeks as black as a night sky. The two had gone through 10 bottles of wine all together.
Maiev was not impressed. There was nothing worse then a drunk anything. She was sitting with Shy and Kisa, who seemed to be a little pale. Kisa pulled out a pouch and tossed it over to Maiev. "You were right, Kael fell over first."
"You all right?" She looked concerned to her friend, a person who she was slowly accepting as a sister. Kisa gave a nod of yes before her head disappeared under the table and into a clay jar. Shy frowned, rubbing her mother's back. "Mama has been really sick." Shy grabbed a napkin and wiped some half digested food from her mother's face. Maiev frowned but knew Night Elf women were tougher then this. She slid over a glass of water for Kisa to rinse her mouth out.
"Could you be pregnant?" it was a simple question, and right now, anything to take her mind off Illidan joining the strippers in a dance. Kisa shrugged. "I had one of those tests done, and they said it was possible." Kisa glanced up to the sight of the two men having fun, drunk off their asses. "As long as he doesn't bring any back to the bedroom." She closed her eyes and rested her head on the table.
Maiev covered Shy's eyes as Illidan went to grind against a stripper, which made the stripper giggle. "I am not sleeping with him tonight, can I bunk with you Kisa?"
"Sure... I'm locking Kael out of the bedroom. He's very... Frisky... When intoxicated. And once is enough for today."
"So when you going to tell him?"
"When he can remember..."
Shy's eyes widened as she peeked through Maiev's fingers. "Uncle Illidan is taking that girl's clothes off!"
"Okay!" Maiev scooped up Shy. "Let's go shy." Kisa pushed herself up and the three started to head back inside. Shy was so freaked out at what was going on. "But daddy is kissing that lady! Mama daddy is kissing that lady!"
Kisa stopped dead in her tracks, drunk or not Kael does NOT put his lips over another woman, she went to turn around to kick his ass. Maiev reached out and grabbed her shoulder. "Hey, if your carrying kids you could get hurt. Let it go for now..."
~0~
The next morning Kael groaned, getting up off the floor. His head pounded and he felt like vomiting up EVERYTHING he had eaten. He blinked a couple times, finding himself on the floor of Illidan's bedroom. Next to him, sleeping, was beautiful Blood Elf and a sheep. He inched away, knowing how pissed Kisa was going to be when she found out. He ended up tripping over something and landed on top of it.
He glanced down to find Illidan, drooling and still sleeping off the effects of the wine. The Demon was as nude as the day he was born. Kael blinked and looked down, seeing he had lost his clothing somewhere in the palace. Exactly what HAD happened last night! Kael was about to get up and leave when a large clawed hand reached up and pulled Kael close to him.
Kael's eyes widened as Illidan started to nibble on his ear. "Common baby.." he purred, groping Kael's chest. "I promise I'll be gentle...."
Kael screamed as loud as he could....
Maiev smirked, walking away from Illidan's bedroom, that would teach them a lesson about making little girls cry...