Just something I've had in my head for a long time. Plz R&R
He watched them leave the bar during Traci's speech and his heart hurt for them. How can they come back from this? He knows they are both strong people but not even those two can cover this one up. We are all missing Jerry but the 2 of them and Traci lost much more than us, they lost a piece of their puzzle.
He waited for them to return, and waited and waited. Finally he had had enough of the bar for tonight and decided to duck out early, saying his goodbyes and another hug to Traci he made his way to the door. What he came upon was not what he was expecting. Standing there in the rain, soaked head to toe was Andy. She looked like she couldn't move and hadn't moved in a while. As he got closer he could see her cheeks were wet but not from the rain, but from the unlimited tears running down her face.
"Andy?" tugging on her arm he tried to get a reaction but nothing. She simply looked broken, almost worse than Traci.
"McNally, come on say something, everything ok, where's Sammy?"
"Gone." it was barely a whisper but he heard it clear and his heart broke for them, he knew if Andy was standing in the rain crying it was likely not a good sign for them.
"Come on let's get out of the rain, you're coming to my place. I'm not leaving you here like this to walk home alone."
Putting his jacket around her he led her to the car and tried calling Sam, which of course went straight to v-mail.
After the short drive to Oliver's new apartment Andy was sitting on his couch. She barely knew how she even got there.
"Alright Andy I need to know what's going on so I can help."
For the first time since finding Jerry on the floor she starting talking about herself and she just couldn't hold it in once she started.
"He blames me and he should. It's all my fault. Right from the start, if I had just gone home with Gail to begin with none of this would have happened. If I had told Sam to drive us both home, kissed him goodnight and gone to bed with Gail she never would have gotten in the cab."
"Andy..."
"No, it's the truth...I should have just gone home. But no, and because of that this whole awful chain of events started." tears were running down her cheeks again
"I can't get it out of my head, walking into that house and seeing Jerry and Sam running to him and having to hold his best friend as he died, I just can't erase it." " I killed my best friends fiance and the man I love's best friend and brother. How do I just continue with my life when theirs have been forever changed for the worse?"
"Andy, listen to me and listen good. This. Is. Not. Your. Fault. It was a horrible thing that happened because of a sick sociopath. If it wasn't Gail, then it would have been another girl and then another and another." "Jerry's death is awful but it is not your fault, and they don't blame you"
"He does. He wanted to go check it out but of course my stubbornness wanted to go check my idea and he backed me because you always have to have your partners back. If we had just gone to that damn house Jerry wouldn't have been there at all."
Oliver could see how this was killing her and he really didn't know what to say to make her feel better. Standing up he walked to the kitchen and again tried calling Sam but again, nada, just voicemail.
As Oliver was in the kitchen Andy decided she was done, couldn't do it anymore, she couldn't imagine looking at Sam everyday and have him look at her like he was, like she killed his best friend. And Trace, she was being so tough but she must be blaming Andy too, how could she not. No she couldn't face their stares of empty sadness anymore. With that she grabbed a piece of paper and pen and wrote 2 simple words. "I'm done." laying the pen down, she got up walked to the door and slipped out silently, leaving everything and everyone behind.
She went directly to the barn, went to her locker and got her badge. Her badge that she wanted all her life that now she never wanted to see again. Looking up at a picture of her and Sam stuck inside she took it down kissed it and walked out of the room towards Frank's office, laying her badge down on his desk, leaving a note saying "Thank you for everything but I quit. -Andy"
As she walked through the barn, holding her picture she walked towards the men's locker room and banged on the door checking for anyone when she got the clear. Turning over the photo she wrote " I'm sorry, I really do just want the best for you - love andy" with tears in her eyes she went into the locker room, over to his locker and slipped it in through the crack. Kissing her hand, she laid it against the locker, turned and walked out of the 15 division for good.